Interesting twist. Very well presented.
I enjoyed your short story very much. I'm glad I decided to stop by.
Jack
A very moving story, indeed. I really liked the ending. Good Job. ANd Good luck with the contest. :)
Very exciting. Good read. I voted for you. Thanks
Thank you for your support. It really means a lot to me.
:-)
The ending finishes too fast. Add some more info about their relationship.
Thank you for your feedback. I am still new at writing, so I appreciate any valuable pointers that are given to me. I hope you find the story good reading as a whole, except for the end.
Desire
Great story but if I were a thriller buff, I would probably go for the expectation being fulfilled...her death. The story reads like the intro to a murder mystery Thriller which you should seriously consider revising away from a tale of romance...unless you made the romantic chivalry of the man as a prelude to a gentleman serial killer.
Thank you for the feedback. This is only the second story that I have written, so I appreciate any guidance I get. I hope I will improve in time.
Desire
I very much enjoyed the pleasantry in this writing at the end. It came as a nice surprise to the gripping and intense chase that led up to it. You have my vote. I liked it alot, and i look forward to reading anything else you write. Keem them coming dear.
j.sin
:)
:-)
This was my second story that I submitted. I have never really written anything else, so thank you very much for your wonderful words.
Desire
Me too