BookRix

♥ ︀➪ ＷＷＷ.ＤＡＴＥ４ＦＵＱ.ＣＯＭ?_ebook-brooke-l-the-box

I agree 100% with Val's kind critique! This is a lovely story! You are destined for great things if you continue to write like this!
Melanie's suggestion is also correct. When two words are used as one, separate them with a hyphen.
These are such minor things! In any short or novel, it is the story content that counts in the end. This one strikes gold:)

Hello Brooke, what a well written short story. You have a good talent and I hope you continue to enjoy the craft of writing.

Carol x

Well written, and sweet. I enjoyed your short story.Serena

May I make a suggestion? Because this is such a short story, could you enlarge the font size? I could not magnify it and so It was a little bit harder for me to read.

I likes it alot, very imaginative good job!1

Glad you made the small changes. It makes all the difference in this short but adorable tale.

First I think, You need to add abit more in the description about the story. Thats your hook to get people to read! I thought your story was cute and well written, A few grammer mistakes,but I could understand it. I hope you write more hun! Thanks! :)

A lovely story and very well written.

Yes...perfect..p