Thank you for creating this Romeo and Juliet story, Louina. You stuck to the theme perfectly, succinctly, and I particularly loved the motif of the star! How appropriate and effective. Nice job.
I might suggest that you take another quick look at tense, however:) You open in present but then wander over to past..then back again, and so on. It would be great to see it all in one tense; consistent. If you opened and stayed in past, for example, you could double space and move the fine ending scene to present...as a remembrance; a final statement that would be so effective.
But...I enjoyed the tragic tale:)
Patrick
Important Post
Thank you for creating this Romeo and Juliet story, Louina. You stuck to the theme perfectly, succinctly, and I particularly loved the motif of the star! How appropriate and effective. Nice job.
I might suggest that you take another quick look at tense, however:) You open in present but then wander over to past..then back again, and so on. It would be great to see it all in one tense; consistent. If you opened and stayed in... Show more