nice man, i think u can be a good writer soon! dont give up! vote 4 u
thou you have some harsh words.. but i guess you have express yourself with a talented imagination... lol if it is an imagination who knows maybe it was happen long time ago
Very good read man. I liked it a lot. I think everyone can relate to it at some point in time in there life.
Very well done. If you write anymore, let me know.
And this guy Alron... whats your deal? I mean, I understand if you feel a certain way about "dirty Language" or whatever your trying to tell yourself.. but i mean, why even take the time to leave a comment besides to criticize Jon for his efforts? You didn't help anyone, not even yourself... these comments are for opinions and feedback, whether there is foul language or not is not important. You have absolutely no insight on... Show more
Awesome ending man. Needs some work on the scene transitions but overall, very powerful. You did good bro. I hope you win.
:)
j.sin