Chapter one

I am a normal girl.

 

I'm short, I'm half blond, half brunette and a little auburn, I have a slight tan and a little button nose. Big boring grey – blue eyes. In other words I'm invisible. Until you look at me too closely. My eyes looked like they belonged in a black and white movie. So dark and fractured, like peivced together broken glass. Which is exactly how I want it to be. I walk down the corridor unnoticed, I don't get grabbed or nudged. I am like gust of wind. I fly through, doing my work and then I am the one leaving silently as other hang in groups talking quietly about strangers they knew more about than themselves. 

 

My name is Rosaline. I am the kind of girl who turns up five minutes before class begins so I can just get on with the day and go home and do what I love. I am a loner. I don't dress to impress or to grab attention. I am just me. The drama of school is enough to make me want to hit pause on my alarm clock and never wake up. Sleep or hide my head in a stupid book, skate on my board into the sun.

 

'Rosaline!' I heard my name shouted but I ignored it. Instead I snuggled deeper into my warm bed. 'Rose!' Wow, my mum hardly ever shouted. I jumped out of pure surprise and ran down the stairs. My mother and farther were already dressed and waiting impatiently in the kitchen. 'Yeah?' I asked bluntly. My mother shot me an annoyed look but handed me the cup of coffee I wouldn't survive the day without. 'Mm. Yes dearest mother?' I asked already feeling awake. I danced my cold toes on the kitchen floor. Noticing for the first time I was only wearing my short grey sleep shorts and dark purple night top. It was freezing!

 

'Me and your farther are going away this weekend. We can't go out on our actual anniversary so we desired to leave a week early. Is that alright with you?' She asked in a tone that said even if you aren't were still leaving. 'Yhea sure have fun' I said with a little smile. I wasn't left home alone allot, I had very strict parents. Rule No1 no boys in the house after 8. Rule No2 no boys in your room ever. Rule No3 No lying. And you wondered why I was such a bore…

 

So yea, I was a goody too shoes, not that I really wanted to break the rules anyway. I ran back up stairs and Changed into a cute white pencil skirt and a light white tank I matched this with black lace up boots which I left undone and a black leather jacket. The school was relaxed and as long as you dressed appropriately you could wear anything. I grabbed my blue –red, yellow and green back pack all softly woven together it was one my mother had been trying to replace with little clutch bags for centuries ( I joke but it certainly felt like it). I unbound my hair, which now fell in long straight locks to the middle of my back.

 

I am smart. I know that sounds vane but it's because I work to be that way. I always finish my work before everyone else and sit in silence waiting. I am the perfect student. Model behaviour, I want nothing more than to be accepted into a good university and be a successful vet, I’m oddly good with animals. 

 

I left the house without eating or saying goodbye. Sometimes my parents were strict and I didn't want to sit through an awkward non-heart felt goodbye. Sometimes it was just better to leave. They would most likely be back before the end of the week regardless. I walked the ten minutes it took me to get to the bus stop and waited for the old growling machine to park by the curb, I hated busses but it was an hour walk – today I didn’t want to have rat tailed hair because of the rain. 

 

I hated buses because you had to sit next to smelly people and endure the meaningless blah they called talking. I normally would put head phones in and tune it all out but I stopped when I saw Scott coming my way. He looked like he hadn't bathed in a day or two. His hair messy from being repeatedly ran through with his hand. It was a move I saw him do over and over again when he was stressed. I smiled at him sympathetically when I saw the bags under his eye, he smiled back but it didn't look like there was much effort behind it. 'H-hey are y-you okay?' I murmured softy, cursing the stutter that came out when I was nervous. He shrugged and sat down beside me defeated.

 

'Every-things been taken away! My dad's such a prick!' My heart beat faster at his harsh words but all the same I felt deep worry and an unsettling feeling settled in my belly. 'My dad caught me with ma... uh..umm a friend in my room yesterday. He threw us both out!' My mouth made an O sigh and I patted his shoulder reassuringly. 'Do you need somewhere to stay for a little while?' I asked nervously, but as soon as the words were out of my moth I froze in shock. Why would the schools most popular guy want to come to my house!? With me? Was I insane?  'Thank you for the umm.. offer Rose.' He knew my name! He actually remembered me. 'Your welcome ummm... Scott' I said replied jokily with a devilish grin. 

 

I looked at Scott's long blond hair and light blue eyes, he looked like he had come straight out of a romance novel. His grin spectacular and he was generally nice. I was being bullied back in second grade and he told the nasty boys off. We had been best friends all the way up until we hit high school, we seemed to go two different ways. I can't believe he remembered me. It broke my heart a little when we went our separate ways but he was like a painting you could observe from a far. I had never really crushed on him as such, just admired his manner. Being friends with a ten year old is different from being friends with a seventeen year old. 

 

 School was a bore and many people were gossiping about Scot and how they saw him taking the bus. His car had already been sold to some Junior. I saw scot at lunch ready to punch some kid who spoke to him wrong. I caught his look from across the room, he was generally depressed. I tilted my head to the door, with a sad smile he walked out with me. The bus ride home was quiet but relaxing, I felt like I’d gained my old friend back – even if I had to bunk school for the first time ever.

 

 

Chapter two

 Old friends

 

Chapter 2

 

My parents had already left and being an only child, there was no way I could possibly get caught with Scott here. I walked up along the paved pathway to the stairs of my home, with Scott walking awkwardly beside me and how did we come to this? Stay tuned fokes. We hadn’t spoken to each other since we were ten, we didn’t stop talking because of some petty fight that caused us to drift apart. We stop talking because of over one summer he got popular and started moving up the social ladder while I just stayed the quite little antisocial me. It got frustrating sometimes, people calling me cute and adorable for being so shy and quite, it annoyed the hell out of me when the people around me start to have what they call ‘a mature conversation’ then look at you and say, “we can’t talk about this here, she’s to innocent.”

 

Did we grow up differently? Did we learn different things? How could they possibly say things like that when they don’t even know me? It’s not that big of a deal I guess, I mean at least they’re not calling me horrible hate filled names. To my face. I have no idea what they say about me when I’m not around, though every time I sit down for lunch, in my usual seat by myself, I notice people looking at me; I swear when they turn around their giggling. To them I was the girl that once was, the ghost. The invisible one...

 

So how did I go from the quiet little girl in the corner to once again housing Scott? Well it all happened on that freaking bus drive! His eye's pain filed eye's I just had to offer. And that is how, after his little fight we ended up here.

 

I thought that since we had spoken, he would forgive his dad and go home, but it was apparent he hadn't. Today was normal, the normal plane floors, doors and very people that walked through the building. Nothing had changed, and probably never would. I stood, quietly and awkwardly in the corner as Scott walked passed me and into the school as if nothing had happened. Once again I was the invisible girl. So when he had looked across the room at me, I knew I couldn’t refuse him the safe passage I had promised.

 

I had to shake of these thoughts, it shouldn’t matter how people perceive me, my own opinion of myself is the only opinion that should count. At least that’s what they tell me. And maybe, just maybe I had my best friend back. Sighing I unlocked the front door and stepped out of the way to let, the still very awkward, Scott through. I ambled silently behind him, as he wandered through the hall way and into the kitchen.

 

“You still remember where everything is?” I asked surprised, when we’re friends he would come over frequently for “play dates” and I was surprised that he still knew his way into the kitchen. But more than that I'm surprised my voice worked!

 

“Yeah, well your house hasn’t changed much; only you have.” He said has he grinned and sat the small table in the centre of the room.

 

“I’m not the one that’s changed.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly the way it sounds.”

 

He looked over at her and smirked, well that hasn’t changed. He’s still has that quirky dimple in his left check that makes him look like a total badass, in a cute sweetheart sort of way.

 

“See, you have changed. The Lisa I know would never speak to someone with attitude.” He said flashing his smile at me again. “Huh I guess you never really knew me then.” He shook his head and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “So how have I changed then?” He asked sounding a little annoyed. “How haven’t you?” I thought back to the times we would play in the sand pit at the park and the times he would stand up against a bully whenever they would pick on someone. “You went from being this cute little boy that would stand up for me and help me with my math homework, to the high school jock with terrible grades and how many times have you been suspended for picking on someone?”

 

After a long and silent pause he said lamely, “I don’t pick on you.” As if that changes anything, so he doesn’t pick on me am I now supposed to bow down and thank him for his mercy? Ha as if I'd do that, I found myself standing taller, wanting him to feel a fraction of the pain and deserted feeling's I had once felt; Right now I felt empty.

 

“No what you do to me is worse; you act as if you don’t know me.”

He looked away ashamed, “ro-“

 

She cut him off before she could hear his pathetic excuse. “You remember where the spare room is?” He nodded and whispered “yes.”

 

“Good, I’ll just get you an extra blanket. If you’re hungry there’s food in the fridge, help yourself.” She began to walk out of the kitchen to get his blanket when he replied.

“Do you want anything?”

 

“No thanks, I had a big lunch.” I looked over at him to see him frown then he shook it off and walked over to the fridge. I’m glad he doesn’t know me well enough anymore to call my bluff, but at the same time I felt a pang in my gut; would anyone ever truly know me? I just turned on my heal, and walked over to the large linen cupboard to get an extra blanket and pillow for him, then placed them on the small single sized bed in the guest room. Just as I was putting some fresh towels in the connected bathroom of the guest room there was a knock on the door behind me.

Chapter three

It wasn't me

 

'Rosie... Look I've been an ass. I know that; Heck the whole world knows that!' I didn't let him finish I couldn't.

 

'Forget it'

 

'What?' A startled look covered his innocent features. How could someone so not innocent look like a cute little puppy? No I wasn't a dog, puppy eyes don't appeal to me! Well much there just too darn cute, Oh dang now I want a puppy. 'Look just do what you came a then leave again. I hear that's all you do these days.' My eyes filled with tears but I blinked them away annoyed. 'Rosie' His voice, my name. It broke me a little. His arms eloped me gently. 'Shh.' He hushed me gently, my body seemed to shake with silent sobs. Over the years, a broken person learns to cry silently. Express no feeling or sound. But with the boy who had once been closer than any brother could I found myself feeling the way I had when I had first met him, how could he break through every one of my barriers so easily?

 

'Shh, I won’t leave you again my little Rosie nose. I swear. Hush now.' I didn't make a sound but he continued to calm me, after I just felt exhausted. Sometimes mole hills really can become mountains. But sometimes underdogs rise, right? Heroes fall. Maybe I would get my friend back. But I found that I could steel him from the people who adored him. 'P-p-promise. Me.' I muttered. '

 

'Anything sweetie' He murmured into my hair. 'P-promise, m…Me you'll apologise to your dad. H-he'll take you back. H-he loves you.' Hiccups separated what I wanted to say, making me sound weak. But it was Scott, he just patted my back absent minded, like when I was a child and suffering with miniature panic attacks. He would sit with me silently, patting and rubbing my back until I would fall asleep. He sighed and nodded once.

 

As my head drooped onto his shoulder, he picked me up easily. His arms were strong and reassuring. He dropped me softly on my comforter, pulling off my shoes and dirty jeans he pulled the blanket over me. 'P-please stay.' I whispered, whimpering at my weakness, he just shrugged and took his own shoes and jeans off. I looked away blushing, he slipped between my sheets, pulling me into his arms, and I felt his rumbling chest against my back. 'What?' I whispered so quietly I wondered if he had even heard.

 

'You. You’re so innocent. It's cute' He whispered into my hair. ‘As cute as a toad.’ I whispered jokingly. ‘I find princesses love kissing toad’s these days. I saw one just the other day.’ He said with a world’s seriousness. ‘You are such a crap liar!’ I giggled, tickled me. ‘Toads can’t cuss, missy.’ He mock shouted as he continued his onslaught. We ended lounging in bed all day watching movies and laughing at the stupid horrors. The fake syrupy looking blood, sausage like entrails. I feel asleep halfway through the third movie.

 

 

BANG. STAMP. STOMP.

 

'I can’t believe you messed up the one job I gave you!!' Came a scream right outside my door.

'Lisa!' I groaned at my shouted name and rolled further into the warm embrace of my bed, its arms circling my waist. It’s breathing as level as my own. Moving in a steady rhythm. I could deal with all that tomorrow. I closed my eyes falling back into a dreamless sleep.

 

BANG!

 

My bedroom door flew open, the hinges creaking loudly in its objection. The light purple room seemed to shudder along with the door.

 

'ROSE I CALLED... WHAT THE HELL! WHO IS IN YOUR BEDROOM, IN YOUR FREAKING BED!'

 

My eyes drifted open in shock, I looked down at the equally surprised Scott. ...So innocent. It's cute. You’re so innocent.... It's cute...

 

The words floated across my mind, my mother looked at me like I was anything but. To her I was a slut, jumping in to bed with the first guy to show me any interest. To her I was no longer innocent, or cute. I could read all on her annoyed face. Me and Scott both jumped from the bed making matters all the more... Even now I could find a cuss word that defined my situation. 'I am phoning your farther young man, let’s see what he has to say about this!' My father's voice boomed, not even looking at me he left. His face blank. He left. Innocent...

 

I turned to Scott wiling, hoping, and begging him to tell them the truth. And like the big meanie he had become he shrugged. No meanie wasn't enough.

 

He was a...

A...

Ass-hat.

 

I felt bad, no – no I didn't and wouldn't, he looked indifferent. I was going to take the fall for this! Cute... Had he lied, is this all he wanted? Wouldn't his dad be angry?

 

As he slept he muttered the name Mattie over and over in his sleep. 'My dad caught me with ma... uh..umm a friend'. That was why he had been kicked out, Scott was gay! He would let me take the blame so he could get off Scott free. Oh the freaking irony! Neither parent looked or muttered a word to or about me, I was left once again in my room. Tomorrow was going to suck....

 

Chapter four

 

Cuss word.

 

I woke up early, rolling over I see my flashing phone glaring at me. Even thats angry with me,  I have  about seven missed calls from an unknown number. I looked at a bunch of messages.

 

I’m sorry I couldn’t tell them.

 

No one knows about me.

 

Rosie please, I said I was sorry.

 

For fuck sake just answer the phone

 

The last message was simple, just one word.

 

Rose.

 

I threw my phone at the wall tears already threatening to overcome me. I picked up my pillow and threw that too but it wasn’t enough. No instead I threw everything off of my night stand, kicked it over and punched the wall a couple times for good measure. Not that I knew how to punch so it ended badly for me. I changed into black slim dress flashing a little boob, and my leather coat. I’d never really liked wearing revealing clothes because I didn’t like my boobs on show although at double d they were hardly easy to miss.

 

This was a dress mum had bought and I’d never worn before. I laced my black boots half way up my calf and walked down stairs with my bruised phone and headphones. I.Had.Done.Nothing.Wrong. ‘Mum shouted at me but I just turned the music up higher. I am Innocent. It wasn’t me – I screamed silently as I left for school. Her bright angry face stayed with me the hour it took me to walk to school. I turned up to English late, I hadn’t done the homework and I refused to take my headphones out, I sat at the back of the class unnoticed as usual. Though I did get some glares as I walked in late, I kept my head down and began work.

 

I struggled with English, I was dyslexia but I didn’t want to call attention to myself in the middle of a pop quiz. I sat there quietly for the whole hour hardly finishing one side of the double sided sheet. As soon as the class stood up I rushed from the room ignoring Misses Nashes look of concern. I walked into history knowing Scott would be there, I sat down on an empty desk next to the window at the back. Scot sat beside me already scribbling a note. I just looked down at my previous notes, from the book I took from my bag yet again I felt I was behind. I flicked through the text book reading the chapter Mr Lindell was about to talk about.

 

I filled out the question air and began taking notes out of the book, barely paying any attention to the words I was writing. Liam handed me a note I chose to ignore. By about the fifth note I was getting annoyed. ‘Fuck off.’ I half whispered at Scott still not listening. Mr Lindell shouted my name, I took out my head phone and sat waiting for him to address me. ‘Yes sir, I’ll stop cussing in your class sir, I’ll stop handing notes sir, and I’m sorry sir for generally interrupting your excellent teaching. Sir.’ He retorted annoyed. I turned and gave Scott an annoyed look, he just shrugged. ‘Fuck-sake.’ I whispered to myself. ‘In all honesty you lost me at the first sir.’ I muttered half-heartedly as I put my headphones back in. I gathered all the notes and tore them up looking at Scott with pure anger. I left the note pieces on his desk as I made my way out of the room. Mr Lindell shot me an annoyed look as I left his class room.

 

I shifted my books in my arms preparing to trade them for my next bunch in my locker. As I shuffled all nine billion of my books two arms cheekily wound themselves on to either side of my locker. ‘Well hello Rose.’ The voice half shouted into my ear phoned ear. I took one out and turned around annoyed, I hated being interrupted. ‘Yes?’ I asked my one and only friend. ‘Don’t yes Rose, spill already.’ He ordered. I sighed and rolled my eyes. ‘You already know or you’re deaf.’ I retorted, I slammed my locker closed and tried to put my earphone back in but he caught my hand before I could. ‘Did he do anything to you because I will kill him.’ He offered with a crooked smile. ‘Jase don’t be an idiot, you know I already have it covered.’ I replied winking at him, he chuckled and put his arm around me as we walked passed Liam who was laughing like a normal teenager, with his popular friends.

 

I looked at Jase with his tousled brown hair and the electric blue lip piercing on the left, he wore well fitting – hole riddled blue jeans with random band logos sown on them, and he wore a black sleeveless with a dark purple paten colouring it, showing his tattooed arms hardly any skin was left un-tattooed. He took out a packet of cigarettes as we walked outside and towards a random tree in the ‘playground’ and I stole one before he could protest. He chuckled and lit it up for me, and laughed harder as I choked. ‘You inhale after the smoke goes in, you don’t swallow it you stoner!’ He called out laughing at me.

 

I stuck out my tong and did as he said, I breathed in the cigarette and then breathed in again. This time I didn’t cough but felt a little dizzy. I shrugged it off and leant against the tree. ‘Your mum would hate me if she knew I just let you steal a fag off of me.’ He said as he smiled down at me. ‘She hates you anyway!’ I called back laughing as he tried to pout. ‘Oh yhea, well I’m fabulous. Fuck her.’

 

He retorted taking another deep drag of his ‘fag’. I watched as the smoke slowly left his lips and rose above his head slowly. ‘Fabulous fucking fairy.’ I muttered back laughing at him. ‘That’s the nicotine hitting your system right about now. Expect sighs of a drowsy patient, maybe dizzy or faint. Greening may be involved.’ He muttered in his I’m totally a real doctor voice. ‘Greening? No way I’m not gonna puke from smoking!’ I argued blowing my next inhale into his face. ‘In some countries, when a lady blows smoke in a beautiful man’s face it means she want to get it on with him.’ He told me raising a single eyebrow. ‘In most countries I could get you arrested for harassment.’ I told him feeling more relaxed now, it may have been my first cigarette but it felt good, like I was breaking the rules.

 

Scott must have over heard me because he walked directly up to me and asked ‘Is he annoying you Rosie?’ I looked at him in utter disbelief. How dare he. ‘What’s bothering me is your traitorous pathetic lying ass.’ I told him monotone taking another drag. Jase looked down at me and grinned as he took a dangerous step towards Scott. ‘Remove your pathetic ass before I beat it.’ Jase told him, he had never looked so angry to me before. Jase had never, ever said a bad word about me. Never yelled at me or was rude – but saying that I’d never seen him look so angry. Not even when I’d ruined his favourite comforter; of course I had bought him a bright pink one to say sorry. It still led on his chair, never being used by anyone but me.

 

I took a step forward too, grabbing Jases hand – His shook with barely contained anger. ‘Liam remove your gay ass before Jase knocks you the hell out.’ I whispered, but of course he heard me. ‘Man he’s a pretentious prick. Not even that queen of a brother of mine is all that bad!’ He muttered to himself, he truly did love his little brother and spent teasing him about his love of dance and ‘jazz hands’ but he had nothing wrong with gays.

 

No, he just hated liars. ‘Hey, you okay?’ I asked him pulling on his hand gently. ‘Shouldn’t I be asking you that? Miss I have the hawtest guy in school turning tail and running.’ He told me squeezing my hand reassuringly. ‘But I thought you were the hottest guy in school.’ I told him giggling at his repulsed expression. ‘Does my hair look remotely groomed to you? No the last time I brushed it was when… erm… well it’s not been touched in a while.’ He spoke like he couldn’t see me anymore, I’m pretty sure he was trying to think of the last time he’d brushed it. With his naturally curly hair he just threw some water over it and tousled it and was good to go.

 

As the bell rang we headed back to classes people started their glares again ‘Slut’ One girl yelled at me, pointing out mine and Jases clasped hands. So many people laughed, the sound of insults and laughter surrounded me. I tried to free them but he didn’t let me. ‘Why thank you, I’ve worked hard for my reputation Rebecca.’ He called her out, tugging me towards our next class Math. Maths was a class I have always looked forwards to, it was the only one I shared with Jase.

 

The first day he had come to our school, he walked into our class late with a lazy grin and a bruised patch on his chin. His knuckled were also covered in bruises and scratches. He walked up to me and said ‘You look like a delightful Nerd.’ I looked right up into his smiling face and laughed. ‘Appearances are shocking, especially when I suck at math.’ I replied moving my bag from the spare seat. ‘Oh no, miss can I change – I called out the wrong Geek!’ He mock whispered already half standing at her glare he sat down grinning at me. That night he came around to my house – like we had said we both suck at math – to try and work on the homework. Over time we still suck. My mother came home and stopped dead, we were sat around the kitchen table drinking coffee and throwing answer sheets at one another.

 

‘Stop drooling over me, you know how leather shrinks.’ Jase called out, pulling me out of my inner most deep thoughts. ‘You’re not wearing any?’ I replied a little confused. ‘Oh yea, you can continue then.’ He looked back at his test biting his pen, he was obviously stuck. I looked over and shot him wide eyes, I shrugged and he laughed.

 

An hour and a half later of silence filled with pens scratching my nerves had oddly settled, which was weird maths drove me insane. I jumped up from my seat when the bell rang oddly feeling the urge to skip to my next class. I grabbed my bag and put away my things humming. The past is behind me,

I’ve done what I’ve done – deal with it! I can’t go back, I can’t face that.

 

I sung under my breath wanting to jump up and down in glee. My happiness was catchy apparently because Jase looked up at me and laughed. ‘Hey, I’m going out tonight with some friends. You should come, a band I know is playing at the Nights Eagle.’ He told me grinning like a maniac, he loved rock music – lived and breathed it. ‘Mm I’ll think about it.’ I told him unsure, I didn’t want to upset my parents further.

Chapter five

The day's regretful end

 

My next class was Health and social care – An actual piece of well piss. The music wasn’t as loud anymore, I didn’t feel like ripping my text book apart. I didn’t feel like crying or screaming I felt okay. Which was weird considering every once in a while someone would call something out to me, I had even heard Jases and Liam’s Argument went viral. Everyone thought they were fight over me, which was funny Jase was my closest friend and Liam was into dudes. Which was fine, I was fine with that I had only ever loved him as a friend but to not stick up for me just so he could earn his cool seat back was sickening. My blood felt afire even thinking about it, my head went blank and I saw red but I didn’t have to deal with that. I just had to keep my head down.

 

‘Rosaline LISTEN TO ME’ Mrs Mills screeched at me in the middle of a lecture. ‘You have been rude and inappropriate all day and I’ve had enough of it. So has everyone else. Now remove those headphones before I confiscate them.’ She shouted at me angrily. ‘Why are you picking on me? I am clearly the only student to finish every piece of course work, and as I told you last week I am not comfortable with you lending out my work as a ‘template’ its plagiarism. And if you insist this I will have to report you!’

 

I shouted back, ugh I’d had enough with this class. I’d finished ALL my coursework weeks ago I should have left ages ago. I stood up and threw my work on the desk ‘Cuse me but I have better places to be, I don’t need to be wasting my time here when I could be working something I need help with.’ I left without waiting for her reply. I walked into the corridor unsure as to what to do, I had never been out of class whilst it was still running before.

 

Jase stood outside of his looking bored. ‘I was wondering how long you’d last in there.’ He called across the hall, he walked across the hallway like he owned it. Not even the hall monitors wanted to try and stop him. ‘Shut up, I bet you were in ICT for like ten minutes!’ I half shouted back laughing. ‘It was seven actually.’ He replied hoking his arm through mine and leading me to the library, he often said he bunked off there – the teachers didn’t mind he actually did most of his work there. ‘Wow, that’s a new record for you – whatta you do this time?’ I asked already feeling a little better.

 

‘Awh you know I can’t tell you my secrets.’ He said rubbing my head. I rolled my eyes and took a seat in one of the stiff chairs in the back corner. We sat there for the rest of the period talking and trying to figure out our math coursework – it was impossible. When the bell rang I sadly stood up and waved to Jase my next lesson was Chemistry whilst his was Biology. I strolled back to my locker depositing my H&S care book and grabbing my chemistry lab book and notebook.

 

‘What’s going on with you Rosie, I heard you’ve been acting weird all day?’ Scot asked pinning me to the locker with one of his hands on my shoulder. ‘Well for one I’m pretty sure I’m being stalked.’ I replied nonchalantly, but his hand on me really did bother me. ‘Oh, who’s following you?’ He asked generally concerned. I shot him a look and replied ‘Half the school thanks you. And the reason EveryOne thinks I’m acting weird is because None of Them know me. You don’t know me. Ever thought of that?’ I asked forcing myself forward thus forcing him to move or we would have head butted or something.

 

He sighed as I walked away from him, maybe he’d give up now he knew all the answers. One class, one class and I would be home free – well ish. ‘Rosie just… just don’t do something stupid. Stupid is me, you are and always will be the responsible one.’ The responsible one, the boring one. The one who went unnoticed. Yhea that was me. I don’t want to be that person anymore, I’m not a quiet roommate I am a child of those living there. I am not boring – I just walk around unnoticed.

 

I walked to chemistry with my head held high, he doesn’t get to know he can still hurt me. No, I am a strong person. I don’t cry, I don’t moan or mope I get on with it. Striding down the corridor I walked in the direction of my class. Jase stood in the doorway of the library looking concerned. I just flashed a confident grin as I passed him, his eyes had a maniac’s twinkle glittering in them. He wolf whistled as I strode passed him, I turned back and winked. His bright teeth flashed a bright white smile. I felt like someone was standing in my corner, beating a drum that only I could march too.

 

Instead of walking along the outside of the corridor I walked right through the middle, not caring if I knocked into anyone. I saw Katie – Scots on again off again girlfriend leaning on some guy’s locker flirting, her eyes squinted in annoyance as she saw me. She even tried to walk up to me, directly in front of me actually – not that it made a difference. I pushed my headphones in and continued walking, just a few steps from crashing she moved aside.

 

The rest of the day was quiet. No one spoke to me nor did they stop me. I got on with my work and then began the hours walk home. It was nice, quiet. Even the trees stood at a standstill, not even a wavering leaf. Everything seemed perfect. Just rightly so. When I reached home – everything was silent. I walked into my immaculate room, not a hair out of place. Just like my mother who sat on my bed. I ignored her and turned my laptop on – connecting my speakers and turning on what Jase liked to call my ‘angry girl music’ on as loud as I could before I walked into my conjoined bathroom. I took my clothes off and showered away the days stresses.

 

The water was beautifully hot, my hair tingled as I scrubbed it with shampoo and then rubbed conditioner in. I scrubbed my body with defoliant and cleaned my teeth. After I had finished I rapped myself with a towel and looked in the mirror. I was clean but still boring, the best thing I could say about myself was that my button nose was cute as were my tiny ears that poked through my wet hair. Which hung limply. My big boring eyes stared back at my unimpressed. I walked into my bedroom and my mother still sat there looking bored. She shut my laptop with a bag, much to my amusement the music kept playing.

 

‘Turn that bunch of noise off now Rosaline.’ She half shouted over the noise, I raised an eyebrow and replied ‘Music and no – obviously it wants to play, how could you refuse it that?’ I replied sarcastically. A quieter song came on and I saw her visibly sigh. ‘Please.’ She said quietly. I walked over to my speakers and turned the music down to background noise. I picked up a brush and started working through the knots in my hair.

 

‘We need to talk about your behaviour young lady.’ She told me sounding exasperated. ‘Yes and if you can’t talk to us, well I’ve already set up an appointment with your mothers therapist.’ My dad offered trying to be helpful. Trying. ‘George we can’t just pass her problems off on someone else!’ My mother told him angrily. ‘Isn’t that a little bit contradicting considering it’s your therapist?’ I replied deadpan. ‘Don’t talk to your mother like that!’ He scolded me. ‘You wanted me to talk!’ I shouted annoyed.

 

 

‘You’ve been acting out a lot young lady and it’s inacceptable. You’re not going out tonight your grounded for a week, you know the drill. We have set up a meeting with the physiatrist in an hour and I expect you to come out of that room with a better attitude towards your mother.’

  

‘You can’t even stand to be around each other anymore. Your honey moon –is next week you should have gone then regardless of work, it’s like you’ve turned into different people I remember when you two first got married – you actually loved each other. But now you are so busy trying to free yourselves of each other, your both drowning in deny. Guess what, you’re living a lie. I have been perfect, PERFECT for the last 17 years. I fall asleep in my room with a friend and I’m the most spiteful, devil child. Years and years of good behaviour – you know what I’m wasting my time here, I don’t need to justify myself to you. I’m not sitting around here all day, I’m not going to see a shrink whilst you sit across the room from me pretending. You already believe what you believe already. You have always focused on my failures more than my accomplishments anyway.’

 

 

With that I walked over to my cupboard, Jase was right. I did need to have some fun. I grabbed an old shirt of Jases, it was a deep blue with black stripes. I wore a black bra underneath that just showed. I wore a pair of short black shorts and black tights that were engraved with roses up either leg – flashing some of my lightly tanned leg. I began the twenty minuet walk to Jases house. By the time I’d gotten there it was around five and my hair was nearly completely dry.

 

Chapter six

 A night worth the regreting

 

I knocked on his door, tapping my foot nervously – what if he wasn’t in? ‘Hag og!’ Someone called the sound of running footsteps down the stairs could be heard for miles around, translation hang on. He yanked the door open with a toothbrush in his mouth. ‘You decided to come! Why?’ He asked sounding suspicious – this was the first time I’d ever said yes before.

 

‘They stood there criticising me for doing nothing. They never listened to me, they had always told me my problems were insignificant. I have tried every day of my life to be there perfect child. I am not this person, I don’t like high heels, I don’t like fancy fish or hand bags. They told me I am a child but I took in a friend who needed help. I was used, I have done nothing but what they have asked me all my life and they always make me feel pathetic. Like I don’t matter, like there’s always something that’s more important than I am. They try so hard to avoid each other and me, it’s like we a roommates not child and parents. All they ever do is ask me if I need a therapist, maybe it’s talked to each other instead of slagging each other off to someone else. I am sick of it, I am not the bad child.’

 

Jase stood there gob smacked and then started laughing at me. ‘What? Did I say something stupid?’ I asked concerned. ‘No, it’s just like you’ve come alive in front of my eyes. Like for the first time I’ve met the real you – Well great I’ve been waiting for months. Come on were going to be late.’ He said looking happy. ‘Put a shirt on before you scare the children!’ I told him laughing and pocking his bare belly. ‘Well I would but it seems you’re wearing it - and well might I add. You goanna do your makeup?’ He asked walking back upstairs into the bathroom, where I quickly shoved him aside and started applying eyeliner to my upper eye lids. The secret was to get it all in one swoop. Don’t stop and do all the way across the top and bottom (water line is the bottom). I then applied mascara and blood red lipstick.

 

‘Rosaline.’ He called sweetly holding a bright blue and purple dyes in his hands – he had been begging me to go pink for months. But every time I’d refused because of my parents – this time I nodded and grinded devilishly. ‘Cool, Ohh you bad ass you – right well sorry babe but your goanna have to take my shirt off.’ He told me grinning devishly. He turned around and grabbed an off black coloured towel and threw it around my shoulders as I unbuttoned his shirt. He started with the blue – he applied the blue to my roots first and then cling filmed random blue streaks. After that he put purple all through my hair. This process took only around half an hour and we had to sit in the bathroom an hour so he went into the kitchen for some time and returned with two glass bottles of beer. ‘Sit back relax have a fag.’ He told me jokingly, refusing to pass me a bottle. Instead I stole his cigarette packet and lighter. I lit one up and shoved the rest in my back pocket. He stood up from his slouching – leaning on the door position and tried to grab them back I told him off saying ‘wouldn’t want to ruin your master piece now would you?’ I told him grinning devilishly. He passed me a bottle and I passed him half of the cigarette I had smoked – this time with little coughing.

 

The beer tasked like actual urine water, but something in me became all hot at the thought of defying my parents further. Jase rummaged through my bag until he found a shade of purple he liked, he grabbed the brush and started dabbing the colour on my lips. After rubbing my lips together the purple blended brilliantly, making my lips look bigger and more plush. After we had finished our drinks he asked me to kneel in front of the bath tub as he rinsed all the colour and tinfoil out. ‘Right stand up!’ He ordered after he had shampooed and conditioned my hair for like the third time. As I did he grabbed the towel from my shoulders and rapped it around my head.

 

‘Dryers in my room, I need to find a top and jeans back in a sec.’ He said, his eyes never leaving mine. That’s what made him such a great friend, he just didn’t expect anything back from me. I shoved all my stuff back into my bag and walked into Jase’s ‘room’, whilst I did Jases shirt back up. In reality his room was a mess of clothes and well I’m not exactly sure it was just a mess. I let my hair down and dried it as much as I could with the towel before finding the dryer and brush – in all places hanging on a hanger in the cupboard. He was so weird some times.

 

I slowly dried and brushed my hair into a fluffy straight purple do. Before I had finished drying it Jase applied a whole bunch of moose making it stay perfect. I grinned looking at the now fully clothed Jase – He wore black skinny jeans and a plain white shirt with grey stripes flowing across it, his leather jacket joined it of course. He wore dark blue doc Martins. His hair was pushed up and forward in crazy natural curls. Even I could admit he looked good. ‘I know, I know I’m hot but we need to go our ride will be here soon.’ I rolled my eyes and threw my bag on the bed, after applying roll on and perfume. I threw my constantly ringing phone on his bed also and grabbed a twenty from my purse. It was what my mum had left for my bus fares for the next two weeks.

 

A guy was waiting outside in his black car, he wore a grey/green tee-shirt with a black dinosaur on it. And had tattoos all up both arms. He wore a beanie on his messy red hair. ‘Ah so this must be Rose, Jases Only friend!’ He called out laughing, music blared from his cars speakers. Jase rolled his eyes and replied ‘Erm you’re my friend dickhead. Rose meet Dick, Dick meet Rose.’ He said as he opened the passenger door, I climbed in the back and said ‘Hi, Rich’ he looked at me in the windscreen mirror ‘You watch too many old war movies, your good.’ I just grinned as he turned the music even higher. The whole car seemed to vibrate with it, the speed and sound were intoxicating. My whole body just wanted to dace to the sweet sound. We rounded corners at a dangerous speed and flew through the night, all too soon we were at the Night’s Eagle.

 

As soon as the car’s ignition was turned off the sound of the bars music was just as loud as that the car played. The whole street seemed to be encased in it. By the time we’d gotten here it was seven, and people were already cuing outside to go in. We stood in the line for about five minutes before the bouncers let us in, Rich led the way to a private little medieval looking table with really old looking benches filled with people either side. Smoke filled the bar and colourful lights broke through. I stood leaning on Jase swaying to the music, ‘Dance?’ He asked me, not even bothering to say hello to his friends. I nodded and grinned, he grabbed my hand and walked around the corner – there were already around twenty people dancing.

 

The song started strong but slow, talking abound danger and love. About intoxication and escape. In Jases arms I felt free, and as he turned me I felt strong. The lights led the way and I followed swaying and turning. Jase let go as I turned and then caught me again, bending me low. I laughed in delight and followed his lead, he was actually a really good dancer. We danced forwards and back, turning and swaying all the way. Suddenly the song changed into something with a faster beat and a darker tone to it. He let go of my hand spun me around by my hips, lifting my hands in the air I swayed my hips from left to right. Dipping every once in a while. Suddenly he pulled my hips around again so I was facing him instead, ‘Trouble at two o’clock.’ He shouted in my ear, I shrugged not bothered at all.

 

The song changed again, this one was slow and dipped in sadness. It told the story of a fourteen year old girl who committed suicide, it told about her sadness. How she was perfect and loved, he sang how short she had lived but how she was an angle. I smiled sadly, and wove my arms around his neck resting my head on his shoulder. After that I saw his head move and watched as he glared at someone. He shortly thereafter pulled me off the dance floor and took a seat with his friends. Rich passes us both a beer and laughed at a joke one of his friends had told.

 

I stood awkwardly until one of their guy friends pulled me onto his lap. I shot him a glare that he only grinned at and replied ‘Your cute when your angry’ I rolled my eyes and ignored the rest of his idle gossip, I was too concerned with what Jase looked angry about – he was talking to Rich in hushed tones. Trouble was brewing. Not to mention Katie was strolling towards me ‘Hey look it Miss steal your guy. Bitch you will regret sleeping with Scot.’

Chapter seven

 Drinks are only fun for a little while

 

I laughed, I couldn’t help it. It had all suddenly all become to hilarious to me. I laughed and laughed and laughed more than I had in months. ‘Seriously? He was never yours to begin with. He’s a person. Grow up Katie.’ I told her standing up, I may have been shorter than her 5.5 by a few inches but I wasn’t afraid. ‘Grow up, babe you come on the map yesterday.’ She taunted smiling nastily. ‘Awh are you jealous? Want me to sleep with you too to make you feel better? Apparently I’m the best he’s ever had.’ I replied walking towards her slowly, I was almost in her face before Jase grabbed me from behind. Katie took the opportunity to slap me across the face before striding away.

 

‘Outside. Now.’ He shouted looking livid. I walked outside rolling my eyes dramatically ‘You told me nothing happened!’ He shouted livid. ‘Actually I told you, you weren’t death.’ I retorted angrily he didn’t have the right to catch me out, no fair. ‘Well tell me exactly what happened now!’ He demanded passing in front of me. ‘You know nothing happened Jase, you know me – can’t you trust me. Doesn’t matter no one else dose anyway.’ I muttered angrily.

 

‘Good, because you deserve a hell pf a lot better than some player who hasn’t got his priorities straight. Like I said you don’t get to have sex till your thirty!’ He told me looking relieved. I laced my arms around him and kissed his cheek ‘You good or do you want a cigarette?’ I asked grinning taking two from the near full packet in my back pocket.

 

He quickly took one and lit both up. ‘Come on I’m done here, let’s have our own fun’ he told me grinning like an idiot. We walked hand in hand away from all the excitement towards a metro Tesco. ‘Wait here.’ He told me handing me his jacket. I quickly put the warm clothing on, rapping the baggy coat around me his aftershave calmed me as well as one of his hugs would have. I leaned back, resting my head against the glass, smoking a cigarette that would one day ruin my lungs but for some reason that didn’t scare me, I just felt relaxed.

 

When Jase finally returned it was with two cases of beer. Now, don’t blame me but I can’t actually explain what happened after my fourth drink. I remember walking back to Jases and then nothing. I woke up – Fully clothed may I add – next to Jase on his bed. I giggled before shaking him awake. ‘School time pretty boy.’ I cooed my head still didn’t feel right. It felt… heavy. ‘Oh shit were goanna be late, mum said she’d kick me out if I came back with another expulsion. I just laughed and made my ditzy way to the bathroom. After rubbing damp tissue under my eyes and reapplying most of my makeup I felt much better.

 

Let me tell you this now. Turning up to school drunk was not the brightest of ideas, neither was – when I eventually got to school, third period in hitting Katie’s stupid face as soon as I saw her. Admittedly I was more than a little drunk still, but as the group of people gathered round cheering me on. The more I wanted her to feel the pain that I had been living with. So I punched her – her nose spattered blood all over clean white shirt but instead of feeling good I felt a little sick. Alcohol was the answer.

 

The teacher tried to drag me to the principal’s office but I didn’t want to go. Kicking and screaming I hit out – I didn’t want to be touched by a stranger. I buckled and twisted hitting back from the restraining hands. Suddenly no one was holding me back I found Jase and ran away whilst Katie was screaming in an overly dramatic manner. Both me and Jase laughing crazily we left school to hang in the park but the more the alcohol wore of the more I knew I’d done a bad thing. By the time we made it back to Jase’s I was more than ready to drink, more than ready to forget. Pretty soon both me and Jase found ourselves passed out on his couch.

 

By the time we’d both woken up the hangover was in full swing, he handed me another bottle promising it would help. Strangely though it did, he found a half empty cigarette packet on the coffee table littered with beers, cokes and fag ends. He offered me one, and I took it gladly. For about an hour we sat there talking and smoking. Mostly though we laughed at Katie’s face. ‘Awh no, you didn’t break her nose! Apparently her sisters holding a party though. Want to crash it?’ He asked grinning at me drunkenly. ‘Might as well, your mum will be home soon – she’d hate to see us here.’ I told him a little drunkenly. He nodded and went in search of new clothes.

 

He threw me a pair of his old black skinny jeans with holes strategically placed in them – he’d worn them the first time I’d met him ‘Here they no longer fit.’ He also passed me a tiny white tank top that must have been his ten year old brothers, my boobs just about fit in. He wore his patchy jeans and a white button down shirt, he called a taxi and off we went (surprisingly it was already 9 o’clock, we’d slept the day away – though I felt a little better for it). There was people everywhere, I’d never been to a house party before but this was insane. People danced on tables, on the stairs even fell asleep on couches.

 

He strolled in, somewhat a little unstably but we’d made it. And Katie was nowhere to be found. I sat down on a couch defeated, some dude came up to me and offered me a bottle of water – he was a friend of Scots, or was it Katie’s I never remember. I opened it and judged the lot before thankyou him, but he was nowhere to be seen. I went in search of him but with every step my head felt a little fuzzier, I felt someone touch my ass but when I turned around no one was there –I’d even lost Jase. Scared I made my way to the front door, but before I got there Katie stood in front of me – something in her hand. A phone? I don’t know everything went dark.

 

I woke up on a hard mattress smelling of puke. I led there dazed for some time before I could even sit up. Beside my bed was a bottle of water – was it the one from before? I looked up and found myself in a cage. Literally a prison cell, worriedly I sat up as the guard outside my room opened the door. Silently he led the way into ‘Interview room 1’.

 

‘What do you have to say for yourself young lady?’ The man asked, he was in his mid-forties, balding and greying. ‘Pardon?’ I asked confused. ‘Well at least you have manners kid, your parents have been called and are making their way here. Before they come though I want to know what you remember.’ He asked me politely.

 

‘Erm, I remember going out with a friend and crashing at his house. Erm maybe going to school. I – I think I went to Katie Lazlo’s’ house. I remember walking in and feeling tired so I drank some water. Erm, I remember feeling I’ll and then I guess I passed out. I think it was the water, the guy who handed it to me diapered.’ I told him truthfully. He nodded but look at me sadly. ‘I’m afraid there was nothing in your water Miss Rosaline Daniels. We had the lab check it out. And the only prints of the bottle were yours.’

 

He informed me with a sad tone, ‘Look kid, I’ve read your file – you’re a good kid. But battery on a Teacher, assault on a student isn’t good. We even have witnesses who can set you and Miss Lazlo arguing at a bar across town. And may I add underage drinking. To top it off kid, we found Class A drugs on you. So tell the truth or you could face serious jail time.’ He retorted angrily. ‘I was t-telling the truth Sir. She hit me, and in school I hit her back I-I didn’t mean to hurt a teacher and I don’t take drugs ask my parents.’ I replied crying.

 

‘Fraid we have, said you’ve been acting strange lately. You’ve never drunk or even smoked before, your poor folks blame themselves. You got two choices kid – attend a reform school or go to juvy. We’ve already talked to the school and your parents and they would like you to attend. The school feels its best for you and you’re... needs. Of course they will provide safety measures and you will be expected to attend the school until the end of august. After that period of time the schooling will no longer be mandatory – unless you slip up again. Sigh here for the school, seriously Kid it’s your best option.’

 

 

I nodded and through my tears I wrote my signature., the scratch of the pen on paper was the only sound I could here. ‘Right, an officer has been sent to collect your personal effects from your home. As soon as you’re done with your parents you will be escorted there immediately. ‘Thankyou sir.’ I whispered crying, I led with my head on the desk and waiting for my parents to come in.

Chapter eight

A fresh new beginning

 

I felt numb like this was some kind of practical joke. Over three days I had ruined my whole life. It was weird I felt somewhat relieved. No more expectations, no more wanting to be perfect I had already hit rock bottom. There was no place else to go. As it was January I had basically seven months, seven months to straighten out. To get my life together, I inhaled deeply as I heard my mother’s high pitched voice ‘Where is my baby?’ a low pitched man’s voice came closer and closer towards my door.

 

‘Right this way ma’am and sir.’ I stood up and braced myself as she threw herself into my arms, he hair dishevelled and my dad’s shirt crumpled with mascara stains on the collar. It was my fault, all mine. ‘I’m so sorry mum.’ I whispered. ‘So sorry.’ I whispered again and again sobbing. ‘Shh it’ll be okay sweetie, everything will be okay. They’ll take care of you.’ She whispered back. My dad threw his arms around us both and said nothing, we all knew it was my fault. We all knew I could do nothing to fix it. We stood silent until they pulled me away. I was literally handcuffed and marched into a plush town car. My phone, bag and ‘my’ cigarettes were placed on the car seat next to me.

 

I no longer felt like a rebel, I felt like a failure. I leaned my head on the cars window still feeling hung over. Three hours later and we were still driving, three hours and my arms were still cuffed behind my back. I felt like I was going to lose a hand at any given moment. ‘You alright kid?’ One of the guys asked for the first time. ‘Numb hand but I am well thank you.’ I replied feeling a little better. ‘I’d let you out but it’s against rules, couple of minutes and were there anyway have a look.’ He called back again, I saw from his face he was sympathetic – young brown haired and blue eyed.

 

I looked out the window and he was right, we were here. How did I know? Because it was a bunch of building surrounded with grassy land. Surrounding the dull looking grass was barbed wire. I could almost taste the sea salt of a nearby ocean. Funny we were in England, its cold all the time – why next to an ocean? I thought to my self silently peering at my new and improved jail cell. We waited as the gates shuddered open, icicles flew apart and broke mid-air. Agonisingly slow we drove towards the security box. Two uniformed security guards stood there looking bored. ‘This her?’ One of them asked peering through the window. ‘Yes sir.’ One of the Police men replied. ‘Man she’s not going to survive a week!’ He replied allowing the little white and red gate to go up. He laughed as he waved us through. Laughed.

 

As soon as the car stopped I sat in the car jiggling about wanting to be free. A woman and three students walked towards the car door. ‘Will someone get her out already?’ Who I assumed to be the head mistress called annoyed. She had white fine hair curled up in to a tight bun, she wore a cream skirt – suit combo and just seemed to breathe power. One of the students that was walking with her opened the car door and seeing my cuffed state, unbuckled me too. I shuffled my legs to the right side and stood up uncertainly. ‘Thankyou’ I whispered quietly the guy who helped me out. I jumped up and down a couple times to recover my sleepy feet. ‘Ma’am may I?’ the same officer as before called. She nodded and asked the other male student to come forward. In his hands he held a kind of chunky watch. I noticed that none of the students there had one.

 

As soon as the handcuffs were free the student holding the watch looking gadget in his hands quickly captured my left wrist and closed it on. It was chunky and uncomfortable and I almost immediately looked for some way to take it off before looking into the well-groomed guy in front of me, ‘Sorry but you won’t be getting that off anytime soon.’ He whispered, his blue eyes alight. ‘Right Rosaline, we have you stationed in the rehabilitation dorm with the rest of the troubled adolescents. This is my grandson Henry the male head prefect, and here is the female head prefect Delilah and the top student council representative Simon, he was the only one with glasses. They have all assured me that they will take good care of you, farewell child.’ She called walking away happily. I looked at her confused, already my head pulsated with an oncoming migraine. ‘Ew, henry this one is drunk!’ Delilah called repulsed.

 

‘They do get much more repulsing as each year goes by. Listen you scoundrel – you don’t own this school nor will you. Keep your head down or we’ll make your life a living hell. Dyson grab her belongings and take her to your dorm, and while you’re at it do tidy yourself up. Have some pride.’ And with that they left me there like an idiot. ‘Wouldn’t listen to anything they say, there all pretentious twats anyway. I’m Dyson and you Rose?’ He started more than asked. ‘Something like that.’ I muttered squeezing my wrist. I opened the police car and retrieved my bag, and went to the trunk of the car – there stood a dark purple suitcase and a small carryon bag that I knew had my laptop in.

 

Dyson grabbed the suitcase and I quickly grabbed the carryon bag quickly calling thanks to my drivers. ‘Oh manners haven’t heard those in a while.’ He told me smiling. ‘Surely people have manners here?’ I asked a little disgruntled, my hangover was in full blast. ‘Well you heard those pretentious pricks, and the rest of us are delinquents, they don’t say please.’ He said already walking towards a redbrick building a little away from the rest of the buildings. ‘You say they – like you are not one of them.’ I replied intrigued. ‘Hmm your right, I am superior.’ He laughed throwing his gold mane of hair back, his eyes were a kind light blue that twinkled. ‘You’re an idiot.’ I told him smiling a little. We walked into the building and a woman was stationed there, an old style phone / booth sat on the wall beside her. She was around her mid-thirties and smelt of cheese for some reason. ‘Mindy this is the new girl Rose’ he told her smiling ruefully. ‘

 

You know the drill, scan and scram.’ She muttered barely taking her eyes off of her keyboard. He walked up to the staircase and as he walked onto the first step he reached to his left and scanned his wristband. I did the same as I passed – each time it called out our full names in a dull robotic voice. ‘Dyson Nigel Leviton.’ And then ‘Rosaline Amber Daniels’. ‘Nice middle name’ I told him ‘right back at cha.’ He replied good heartedly. ‘Well your in room 23, there’s only 24 of us so it shouldn’t be too hard to find you just walk to the end of the third floor and you’re basically there. Mines the first on the third floor too. I’m number 13 if you ever need anything.’ He told me sweetly lugging up my bag with some effort. It honestly looked really heavy ‘I’m sorry I don’t even know what are in them.’ I told him once we walked up the first set of step – there was a door leading to the second floor but we carried on climbing.

 

We passed his door and walked all the way to the end of the hall – nearly. ‘Thankyou so much, I really doubt I would have been able to carry my own suitcase up those stairs.’ I told him a little shamefully. ‘Don’t worry they’ll soon beat that out of you.’ He told me cheerfully before leaving. I opened my unlocked door and walked in. It wasn’t too bad, a single bed sat in the corner of the room. And a chest of draws to the left – the top of them appeared to double as a table. There was a lonely door at the end of my small room, when I opened it – it led to a bathroom. With only a; shower, toilet and sink it was small – clean and cute.

 

I walked back over to the chest of draws and opened the first draw in there was a letter ‘Dear miss Daniels, lunch starts at one, someone will be sent to collect you. Today’s lessons will begin at two. Tomorrow you will be expected in class at 08:00.’ That was all that was written on the simple sheet of paper in neat almost calligraphic writing. I spent the hour I had free to myself unpacking my belongings, slowly my hangover ebbed away. In the top draw I found a whole bunch of neatly folded skirts, shirts and cardigans. In the second draw I found skorts (skirt / shorts used for tennis or running) and plane black running gear, all sized 8 there were a variety of long shorts, running tops and plain black jogging bottoms. What kind of school was this? I asked myself worriedly.

 

I quickly changed out of yesterdays and the day before’s clothes and into the black skirt and white shirt, it was a little cold so I wore the light black cardigan too. As I was not given any directive on footwear I just wore my normal boots. I sat waiting patiently, I got bored pretty quickly so I side braided my hair mixing the newly coloured hair mix. When I was done I let it all fall back down again and repeated the process – halfway through though there was a knock at the door. I slowly walked over letting my now slightly wavy hair down.

 

I opened the door to greet a chirpy girl with a short pixie cut and a cute little nose, she was a tiny bit shorter then my 5.2. ‘Hey’ I said smiling a little. ‘Ooh so you’re the new girl! I’m Lilly Newland, you can normally find me in the library’ she told me chirping on happily. ‘Oh-no! Did no one tell you we always work physical after lunch? Lessons start at 8, breakfast is seven, lunch one – and physical Ed from two till five. Dinner is at seven. Dorms at ten and lights turn off at eleven.’ She told me looking a little put out. ‘What are our lessons?’ I asked curiously. ‘Oh you know – English, Maths, there version of science and then there’s law and first aid.’ She told me smiling. –What? What kind of lessons were those? I asked myself

Chapter nine

 Rabbit food and jerks

 

‘Oh crud come on were goanna be late!’ She squealed quickly throwing open my draw and passing me a pair of mid-calf length shorts and a running tee. I threw off my clothes and passed them to her as she threw a purple, blue and green striped sports bra, I pulled it on over my normal bra and put on the sleeveless running tee. And then the shorts. She pulled out a draw under my bed and passed me a pair of black running shoes. She wore similar clothing herself but hers seemed to fit her better.

 

The tee squished my boobs a little but it felt like a good support. She grabbed my hand and started running out my door and down two flights of stairs. Scanning the scanner thing on the way down I sprinted out of the room hearing the teacher shout ‘Don’t be late girls’ in a tone that clearly stated she didn’t care. I ran only slightly ahead of Lilly but stayed back not knowing where we were going. ‘First building on the right’ she panted barely able to keep up. I grabbed her hand and pulled her along, running faster.

 

‘It’s in your mind – come on you can do it!’ I shouted grinning freakily. She nodded once running faster, she nearly tripped but I slower down and caught her easily she quickly fell back into stride and we burst into the doors panting. ‘Nailed it!’ I shouted high fiving Lilly and bending over to catch my breath. ‘Girls I expect a better effort later or you will go without dinner.’ A small woman with short blond hair called, ‘Ma’am yes ma’am. I called out pulling Lilly to the line.

 

There wasn’t a long line of people any more – most already had their food, already sitting down. Suddenly the door opened again and a guy around 5.10 walked in, he wore all of the uniform – black trousers and a white shirt but he wore a bright red and black scarf wound around his neck. He turned grinning to one of his friends, on the side of his head was the outline of a love heart – inside filled in with red.

 

The rest of his hair a deep black, he wore his hair in a messy Mohican – his hair tussled and free to do as it wished. He had that kind of smile only really self-assured guys did, a single dimple in his cheek and a perfect laugh lines every time he smiled. He was quite pale, at met my eyes with his extraordinary bright blue ones – they were almost electric blue. Which he used to glare at me, I turned away rolling my eyes – I had, had enough of guys lately.

 

‘What’s on the menu?’ I asked sweet Lilly as the douche strolled over. ‘Erm sandwiches I guess.’ She tittered on her toes still not totally recovered from our little sprint. ‘Oh no.’ I whispered to myself. ‘What’s the matter?’ She asked. ‘I’m allergic to Gluten.’ I whispered. ‘Oh, that sucks.’ She whispered back. She walked up and grabbed a random sandwich, some salad and a drink.

 

I just grabbed a plate of salad and a bottle of water. ‘What’s the matter bread not good enough for you? Or are you on some new pathetic diet.’ He asked. The glaring idiot. I turned around and walked slowly back up to him, I told half his sandwich and took a bite before placing it back on his plate. With that I walked away without a word. I was going to regret the stomach ache later, I had a trapped nerve just under my rib and I hadn’t taken my medicine in days.

 

I clutched it unconsciously, looking down I forcibly removed my hand and smiled – I didn’t need my tablets. It was in my mind, I will be fine. Doctors had proved time and time again that placebos worked just as well as normal medicine. Pain can be ignored – physical pain, I don’t think it would work on something like cancer though it wouldn’t be a bad option to keep their hopes up – but is that morally right.

 

I shrugged to myself, I needed to ask someone here if they had my med’s they weren’t in my suitcase. Suddenly one of the teachers walked up to me and handed me a little plastic cup, there stood my little mebeverine and my pill for acne. ‘Yay…’ I whispered rolling my eyes and swallowing them both. ‘Can’t I have my own meds – what am I goanna do, OD on antispasmodics?’ I asked sarcastically scrunching the cup in my hand and throwing it in the nearest bin. I walked over to where Lilly sat alone ‘Is that why you’re here? For ODing?’ She asked generally interested.

 

‘Naa but I remember that next time.’ I told her smiling. ‘Apparently I’m a dealer.’ I told her smiling sourly. ‘Are you?’ She asked curious. ‘Yes – I’m crap at poker, I always call dealer.’ I told her winking. Her mouth made a little O before she shook her self-physically and began eating. ‘So you’re in here for gambling?’ She asked. I laughed ‘I wish, I suck like I said. This is killing you isn’t it.’ I said laughing at her fidgeting in her seat. I sighed ‘It wasn’t one simple thing. It was a group of them that led me to be arrested. Now please eat your food I don’t want to talk about it anymore.’ I told her softly but firmly.

Chapter ten

Who the hell does physical ed for three hours anyway?

 

I ate my rabbit food with surprising vigour – I was hungry. The water helped my dehydrated brain and bit down on a juicy slice of apple. I sighed at Lilly’s sad face ‘I’ll tell you one thing, I’m kinda innocent – yhea I hit Katie but she slapped me first blamed something on me like he did, it’s his fault that liar. I accidently hurt a teacher too...’ I whispered ashamed. ‘I hurt someone too.’ She whispered back her eyes looking anywhere but at me. I took her hand in mine and whispered ‘it’s okay’ back to her. She squeezed my hand and smiled sadly ‘I’m glad it is you who came here, so many people who are here are just wrong. So many…’ She trailed off getting quieter and quieter. ‘Is that right Lilian, you are not all that ‘Innocent’, as you claim to be are you.’ Whispered the stranger who walked in late. I shivered wondering myself what these people had done. I closed my eyes and sighed – it was my fault I deserve to be here. I told myself.

 

‘Lunch is nearly over we might as well start walking to the gym – you don’t want to work out after stuffing your face, you need at least ten minutes you don’t want to puke’ she told me after we had sat and ate in silence for a while. I nodded and picked up my tray, walking over to the bin I scraped the remaining food off and left the empty plate and tray on the metal frame that already had a few decorating them.

 

The lunch room had only around thirty people in it – no wonder those people from before thought themselves higher than us, they were taught it. Even segregated classes and eating times, dorms. It was ridiculous. I left shaking my head at the sight of so many grey watch like things. I left feeling disappointed, I knew I didn’t have any right to feel that way but it was true. I sighed and left for the ‘gym’ it was a nice slow walk, taking only a few minutes but none the less it was a nice day. Not to hot or windy, not to bright or dark – perfect would be when a slight rain fell but it didn’t look like it would for at least a while.

 

I smiled up at the sky and regretfully walked into the gymnasium. ‘Bleep test. Gear up and shut up!’ The same blond woman as before shouted, she was slender with hazel eyes. I began stretching, bending down I touched my feet easily, bending one leg forward I stretched again until I felt the burn. I did the same with the other leg and then lifted it up folding the calf and pushing my hips forward to stay balanced. After ten seconds I changed legs, next I stood with legs shoulder length apart and touched the ground again then turning my left foot I faced that way stretching again. Next I stretched straight up in the air and pushed my chest forward as I put my arms behind my back. I then turned right and bent that way too. Eventually I met back in the middle again.

 

I stood with my left knee bent facing the right side, I twisted my body right and then left hearing it click again. I then did the same with opposite knees and directions. I then started stretching my arms as I walked up to the start line.

 

The gym was lit hazily, and the walls were a pristine cream colour but the wooden floor was scuffed and well warn. Covered in basketball marks on the floor and running tracks around the outside. On either side of the hall was a basketball hoop. Adrenaline built up in my body preparing me for the run ahead, I was so psyched. The only time I shined was in sports, I was competitive in the few sports I knew but something about running just made me feel purely free. Upbeat pop music played loudly but stopped for a second and a ding could be heard clearly. That’s when we started to run. I jogged forward and waited until the dig so I could run back. I breathed slowly and mentally chanted ‘It’s all mental’.

 

I jogged again a little faster, my heart beat incredibly fast wanting run no sprint. I kept myself in check, I knew the bleep test could become hard. Ding, run to the other side. Ding and off I go again barely a fifteen second pause after I had stopped running. Ding, run. Fourteen seconds. Ding run. Twelve seconds. Ding, run ten seconds. Ding, run and an eight second break. Ding, run. I counted six seconds after my run. Ding, run. Four seconds. Ding run five people were no longer running. Ding, run. A two second break. Ding, run, no break. Ding sprint. Ding and another three are lost. Ding, sprint. Another four are lost. Half of the group was down. Ding, sprint. Another two.

 

This continued until there were five of us left, Lilly cheered me from the side lines – she hand dinged out last run. Ding, sprint – turn. Ding, sprint – turn. Ding, ding, ding. Three remaining. The rude guy from before and a tall athletic type guy. He was clearly 6ft something tall. Ding – opsie. I sprinted using everything – mini seconds before I needed to turn tail and run. This time I didn’t hesitate I just ran.

Ding, ding, ding and the tall guy was a step ahead of us both now. He was physically fitter than me. I stayed in for two more rounds before dinging out. The rude guy lasted a single round longer before also dining out. The tall guy ran two more before dinging out himself, sweat spread off his naturally dark skin. ‘Work on your turning Daniels, tomorrow I want another two rounds from you.’ I nodded as I bent over breathing heavily. ‘Right, you lazy lot get up twenty burpees now!’ She called out, the people all around me were suddenly jumping in the air crouching down and jumping into push up position.

 

On the second ‘burpee’ I joined in, they were actually quite fun. 18 later they were a little less fun. ‘Jump squats – twenty now!’ She called next. ‘Hands in front, knees over toes. Ass to the ground. Go, Go, Go!’ she called enthusiastically walking around the room, these were a little embracing but not all that bad in the end. On twelve I could feel a slight burn in my calves and thighs. At fifteen they started to burn. At twenty I was a little wobbly. Even my but did!?

 

‘Push up fifteen go! Asses down arms shoulder width apart.’ She called out next, to be honest I was finding this hard sweating profoundly. ‘You’re not dipping your tits in water get down and dirty girl!’ She shouted at me pushing my body inches from the floor. I managed four before I fell. I got up and did ten more. ‘For that pathetic attempt I want a hundred sit up’s now Daniels. I knew I could do this, I was good at sit ups – strangely. Last time I counted I could a hundred and fifteen. Before the injections to stop my trapped nerve from hurting 70. I knew I could smash both records. The first twenty a student counted out were done in 18 seconds.

 

I led with my legs firmly on the floor and my back just touching each time, Lilly stood on my feet stopping them from moving. The ground was hard and hurt my back but I knew I had to do this. It’s all in my mind, I can do it. The thirty marker was counted out – 24 seconds. The first fifty done in 39 seconds. I was getting faster not slower. No turning back now. I breathed out a gust of air and continued. The seventy marker was called out. 55 seconds. A hundred and ten and I was just breaching the 1 minute 24 seconds marker. ‘You can stop’ the teacher said off handily but she was leaning forward too. My back hurt and strangely my shoulder blades but for once my stomach was fine.

 

Ten down. Twenty. Thirty five. Forty! A hundred and fifty – two minutes three seconds. I was proud of that, once I had reached a hundred the speed had slowed down but two minutes was good. I smiled to myself and led back. 'Well done Daniels not only have you proved to be a pain in the ass but one that doesn’t listen!' She called as she winked at me and flicked her hand towards the ceiling as if to say get up you've proved your point.

 

 

 

Chapter eleven

Race me

 

‘We’re doing boxing today – get into your partners. Daniels your with Lincoln don’t scare this one away!’ She called out I turned until everyone had paired off. The douche from earlier, he stood with his arms crossed his chest looking bored. I walked over slowly and stood opposite him, he got himself into a defensive position and went to hit me in the face. I stepped back uncertain. ‘Arms up Rose’ he called taunting me. How was I supposed to do this, I’ve only ever punched one person before and it hurt my hand. Well I hurt that teacher but I hadn’t meant to.

 

I followed his stance, arms both in front of him. Facing different directions almost crossed over but the left was lower. I bent my legs a little and faced my feet facing the corner of the room instead of directly in front of me. At a slight horizontal line. Not facing forward but not facing left either. My hips faced the wall whilst my upper body faced him. ‘Take a step forward see how it feels.’ He told me doing the same. ‘Nothing is ever as it seems.’ He told me cryptically. I rolled my eyes ‘cut the bullshit and teach me how to fight already!’ I told him annoyed.

 

He shrugged and attempted to hit me again. I pulled my right arm (the one above the lower arm covering my stomach.) Best defence is a good offense, I hit out with my left as our right arms were thrown together. He moved his head to the side at the last second – my fist barely scraped his cheekbone. ‘Do they plan on teaching us to fight so we kill one another or so we are so tired that we cannot?’ Wondered aloud as I jumped backwards after my hit had landed. ‘Smooth’ he muttered laughing at me. He came at me again trying to punch me, we worked at different blocks and what to do for about an hour before we were called back into the middle of the room. My arms and back ached, throbbed even.

 

‘Lastly we have a challenge for you all. Outside we have set up a course for you all too run. It should take you around ten minutes to complete, anything above eleven is a fail and anything bellow nine will put you at the top of our school leader board. Of course the other students have been here much longer and we expect them to come quicker – let’s prove them wrong!’ She cheered and showed us the way outside, at least someone liked us – I thought with a mental chuckle.

 

She was right it was some course, to begin with were those silly tires footballers waddle through. Next came a huge wall with sparse climbing foot and hand grabs. Above the wall were metal bars – eight of them you had to monkey bar yourself across them. Beyond that was a hike up a muddy hill and a crawl through a fake barbed wire – well I hoped it was fake. At the end of that there was a bell after a hundred meter stretch. The bars didn’t look all that stable. I sighed.

 

‘You will run in fives, the last of the bleep test shall run first. Paul, Lincoln, Rose, Ellie and Nathen you’re up first.’ Ellie was tall and muscular as was her male twin, the both had fiery red hair and little freckles. I lined up and prepared to run. ‘Three, two and one!’ She called. I sprinted to the base of the tires, there was a live of ten. I had done this before for football, I wasn’t as fast as Nathen but I was quick. He was a little taller than me. I sprinted to the next obstacle. The climbing wall, I jumped and landed a little under three quarters of the way up. I pulled my weight up the wall not looking down. Air escaped my lungs in short rapid bursts, within twenty seconds I was nearing the top. Two more pulls and I was there.

 

I stood on the top of the wavering wall, I leaped keeping my arms out ahead of me. I caught it, my hands stung from throwing myself on the beam but it was okay. I saw Lincoln and felt his weight as he jumped beside me, quickly I started putting one arm before the other shifting my weight and bars. He was two ahead of me. There were three thick ropes to climb down on. I quickly jumped on mine, and doing the hand under hand technique I climbed down well until I slid a little and nearly fell, my hands burned.

 

I sighed as I came a close second.

 

‘Sucks being tall Paul muttered nodding towards Lincoln’s grumpy face. ‘Right, Paul nine minutes thirty seven seconds. Rose – forty seconds. Lincoln 43. Ellie 47 and Nathen 50.’ She told us smiling happily. ‘You beat most of the other class. Work with your partners – by the end of the week I want a flat 9 minutes. I nodded and waited until the rest of the people had finished. ‘Rose.’ The teacher called as I stood there staring at the obstacle course. ‘I can see that you’re mentally focused and ready to be a good athlete, but you’re not as strong physically as you should be. Because you’re already beating most of your class we’ve prepared a tutor for you.

 

‘He expects you in the gym at six and you may leave to dress and eat at seven. After classes you will continue a two hour training session with your trainer – you will then go for lunch as normal at seven.’ I nodded and smiled secretly though I wanted to cry – I hurt enough.

 

Chapter twelve

 When did three plus sleep equal two more hours of slave driving?

 

No, that is not accurate math. I sighed and stood there alone feeling like an idiot. I looked down at my slightly burnt hands with a little concern but they weren’t too bad. Suddenly I heard footsteps behind me, I turned around and there stood Lincoln in a stupid grey sweater. ‘No, I am not getting up at six to see your stupid face Lincoln! I’m not training with you doubly! Can’t you just kill me?’ I sighed and looked down at my hands again.

 

The Lincoln took down his hood and revealed a much more tanned, bigger version of the original. ‘Ah my dearest half-brother, how long you known him – two minutes?’ He asked chuckling. ‘I’m cam.’ He told me holding out his hand, I went to shake his hand before he turned the skin of my hand over. ‘Does it hurt much?’ He asked already grabbing a thin bandage from his bag and wrapped it around my hand and then the second. ‘Not as much as you’d think. Can you show me how to climb properly?’ I asked a little anxious. ‘Sure – from what I hear you’ve done enough cardio and core strengthening today anyway. Right, can you start from the wall and stop at the end of the rope?’ He asked. I nodded and walked over to the wall, my legs and shoes were covered in mud but at least I didn’t have trousers on that would have been awfully heavy.

 

‘Go!’ He shouted once I’d just passed the tires. I sprinted forward, putting my foot on the bottom foot grip – I’d watched so many other people do it after my run. It seemed easier too, I didn’t want to splat into the wall. I bent my knees springing myself into the air, I grabbed one of the hand grips and pulled my body up to the next step. I did this until I reached the top of the wall. Where I sprang forward and jumped onto the metal pole, I quickly placed one hand on either side to stop myself from falling.

 

After swinging like a chimp I jumped onto the rope and let myself down a little bit by a little bit. ‘Use your feet as breaks of you’ll slip. I nodded and jumped down after I hit the halfway point. ‘Right, it’s all good that you’re okay with heights but you need to learn to like the ropes because you can’t always avoid them. Right, what else do you suck at?’ He asked. ‘Pull-ups, push-ups’ I listed off. ‘Sit-ups?’ he asked curious. ‘I can do one fifty.’ I told him proudly. ‘That’s good so your cores strong. Okay, we need to work on your pure muscle and you diet.’ He said making a mental list. ‘Right well let’s go to the ocean.’ He told me grinning like a devil. I looked at him like what? ‘Come on it’s only a mile run – should take around 5 – 6 minutes if you get a move on, trust me you want to be warm for this.’ I groaned and moved my tired legs in the direction of the salt water.

 

He was right it wasn’t all that bad. ‘I want you to lie in the on the shore of the water and do a plank.’ A plank? Easy. I led down and quickly put my elbows flat on the sand with my fingers laced together. ‘Get that ass down!’ He shouted just before a wave crashed into me, leaving me a heap on the ground. I nodded and got back into position. The cold water bit and every single part of me, holding my breath I held the plank as the water rushed by me. ‘Good you’ve gone ten seconds. Try and reach thirty.’ He called out to me smiling. My whole body shook with the wind and the water. With the strain and the insanity. How had I lasted this long?

 

‘Thirty, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.’ Splash! I fell. ‘Okay this time you know you can do it. This time you’re already wet. I want you to scream out the numbers one by one. I nodded once and held myself in the plank position once again. ‘1, 2, 3, 4, 5...’ I held my breath as the water splashed over me. ‘No scream into the water. Don’t let it know your fear.’ This time I did as he said. ‘6, 7, 8, 9.’ Splash. ‘TEN, ELEVEN, TWELVE!’ I screamed into the water as it flooded everything around me. I gasped and continued. ’10, 11, 12, 13.’ The water came once again. ‘FOURTEEN, FIFTEEN, SIXEEN.’ I gasped again and continued. Numbers that all that was on my mind. Not the cold. Not the wind or even breathing, I did that naturally. ’17, 18, 19, 20.’ The water once again came for me. This was a big wave but I wasn’t scared. They were just numbers. ‘TWENTY ONE, TWENTY TWO, TWENTY THREE, TWENTY FOUR, TWENTY FIVE.’ I gasped in air again, I could trust my body I knew I could.

 

Two minutes later and I was still screaming into the ocean. ‘Stand up.’ I did almost immediately, I noticed my clothes were clean. ‘Very good, you have a very strong will Rose, we can work with that.’ He said smiling. ‘This time I want you to burpees into the water. Between each burpee I want a push up. Hold your breath going under – exhale on the jump up and inhale on the jump down.’ I shrugged and jumped into the air, I no longer felt cold. I was burning with adrenaline, with cold, with fight. I had never felt more alive.

 

I jumped it the air, releasing the air in my lungs. Bending down I filled them again. I held my breath as I plummeted to the ground. I exhaled again whilst jumping again and inhaled on the way down. I held my breath as the water pushed me down to the bottom. I pushed myself back up and jumped up. I inhaled and jumped down to plummet again.

 

Fifteen later he stopped me. ‘That’s good. You can stop. I need you now to do a push up under the water. Go down when there’s no water and burst up when there is water.’ I looked down at my body surprised, I wasn’t shivering. I did as he said holding the down position, until the water washed over me. Up, breathe. Down, hold. Up, breathe. Down, hold. Up, breathe. Down, hold. Up, breathe. Down, hold. Up, breathe. Down, hold.

 

‘Come on kid I think you’ve had enough.’ He called as my body finally started shaking. I nodded and jumped up, running out of the water I started doing jumping jacks, a jump squat and then a burpee. I stopped on the third of each exhausted. ‘What next?’ I asked, my adrenaline levels were so high right now it was insane. ‘For one we need you to get dry, its half an hour till lunch. I’ve got what I need from you today anyway. I need to go talk to the chef about your dietary requirements. Any allergies?’ he asked as I jogged on the spot. ‘Erm, I think. Yes Gluten and citric acid.’ I said shivering violently. We started running back, I felt a little better but not much. ‘Shower in cold water, slowly rise the temp. Don’t go boiling straight out or you’ll burn yourself.’ He told me jogging off towards the mess hall. I jogged over to the dorm house, not able to run any faster – I bumped into Dyson.

 

‘Holy shit what happened to you?’ He asked as I passed him on the stair cases inside. ‘Tra-ani-ning’ I stuttered. ‘Jeez you got yourself one tough ass trainer.’ He sated as he passed me on the stairs. I laughed as I ran up the first set of stairs (signing in) and then the second. I ran into my bedroom without any more encounters and turn the shower on cold. I jumped right in with my clothes on, slowly turning up the heat I slowly felt normal again.

Chapter thirteen

 Meal two - can I stomach more salad?

 

I slowly scrubbed myself and my salt filled hair. The sting from the sea still coated me, After I had washed I quickly brushed my teeth and hair – braiding it as I went in search of the pink muscle bandages I used when I had sprained my ankle. I found them in my pants draw – which kinda freaked me out, the thought of someone ruffling through my underwear draw to pack them. I sighed and quickly applied bandages to both hands, eventually minuets till seven I walked the short distance to the cafeteria.

 

I saw Cam almost immediately as I walked into the room, he stood next to his pain in the ass brother. He waved me over – nerve wracked I skipped about ten people in the line. ‘Erm in some countries people get murdered for skipping lines.’ I murmured quietly as I looked back at the angry people behind me. ‘Well at least you would be eating right.’ He told me grinning like an idiot. ‘Please tell me it wasn’t too much of a problem for them to cook wheat free?’ I half whispered biting my lip. ‘Stop being an idiot – it’s their job.’ He told me rolling his eyes. ‘Their job is to cook for delinquents not  some rich girl who moans about a belly ache!’ I retorted. ‘If it was such a little problem, why are you taking these?’ He asked waving an antispasmodic. ‘Because I have a trapped nerve, every time I eat wheat it makes it like ten times worse!’

 

I replied snatching away the pill and swallowing it before anyone saw. ‘Then why did you steal some of lincolons sandwich earlier? He spent most of fucking lunch moaning about it’ He asked leaning in generally interested. ‘Because he was being judgemental, pretentious prick’ I told him dead pan. He chuckled and moved up to the counter and collected his stir-fry. He passed me a plate ‘don’t worry it’s fun free’.

 

He told me smiling, he also grabbed two fruit bowls and two smoothies. ‘I can’t believe I have to be training at six.’ I moaned slumping into a chair opposite Lilly, Cam sat next to me and handed me my food. ‘Not only do you have to watch me take my meds but my food too, what am I going to do – starve myself?’ I said exasperated. ‘What if I just wanted to know more about you before I drown you some more.’ He said smiling his stupidly cute smile. ‘So they do think I’m suicidal, sweet.’ I said putting my head on the table in annoyance.

 

‘No they think you’re temperamental, which you’ll prove to them if you don’t take you meds, eat your food and don’t break the rules. Rule breakers don’t last long here Rose. They never have.’ He whispered close to my head, I sat up and started eating the stir fry. I’m sure it didn’t taste all that bad but all I could taste was burnt ash in the back of my throat. I finished every bit, filling my empty body with food. I even ate all the fruit in silence. After force-feeding myself I began drinking the smoothie – which I had to admit though was really nice.

 

‘I hope there are more smoothies in the future that was really nice, thank you.’ I murmured to Cam smiling softly. ‘Thanks, I can show you how to make them if you want?’ He offered kindly but I yawned and shook my head sadly ‘Any second I’m going to crash out and I’d rather not have noodles for hair. But thank you.’ I said as I took my plate and bowl to the collecting area. I kept hold of the plastic drinking cup that held my smoothie, yawning a final time I made my slow and painful way back to the dorm. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out like a shot.

 

I woke to a kind of weird vibrating happening on my arm - 5.45 am, Thursday.  I groaned and rolled out of bed. ‘They think you’re temperamental, which you’ll prove…’ No I won’t. I rolled out of bed and shoved another pair of shorts on, and another black sports top. My hair was still braided from last night so I jogged quietly down the two staircases, logging in on the machine I jogged my sore muscles back to the main gym, I found Cam standing with weights all around his feat. ‘Remind me why I haven’t already drank a metric shit tonne of coffee!’ I called as I entered the room yawning. And stretching. He threw a ten pound medicine ball at me, barely catching it I looked at him confused. ‘Caffeine slows down your metabolism. You said you were good at sit ups right why them and not press ups.’ He asked as I sat in the sit up position. I threw the ball went down and caught it on the way up. ‘Because I feel relaxed. I can easily turn my ration thinking off, it’s like I know I can do it and I know I won’t fall or anything so it’s fine.’ I replied honestly.

 

‘Right you like them because you’re safe.’ He said smiling mischievously ‘twenty more and you’re done.’ He told me after I’d done ten. I hummed quietly to myself already feeling the tightening and pulling of muscles in my abdomen. I felt like someone had grabbed two halves of my body and pulled them until something broke. ‘Right pick up ten kg and show me how to lift it.’ He said pointing at one of the smaller bars with smaller weight attached. I picked up one and put my arm by my side before lifting just my fore arm to the height of my shoulder. ‘Good now pick up the other and do the same.’ I did as he said a completed a couple ‘reps’. ‘Right now I need you to imagine there’s a line in the top of your head reading the top of the ceiling, this line however goes the whole way through your body keeping you up straight.

 

I want you to also keep your elbows to your higher hip, as if you’re a penguin wobbling along. Like you smell bad or something.’ He told me and as hard as I tried my arms kept slipping forward, sighing he placed his hands on either side of my arms keeping them in place as I did ten. And even with the small weight. ‘This sucks.’ I moaned yawning again. ‘Jump squat, burpee and a star jump’ He said looking at me amused. I grinned and did five of each feeling much more awake and my legs begging to ache pleasantly. ‘How’d you sleep?’ He asked politely. ‘I went into my room and just slept – It was great, I suffer from insomnia so I was surprised.’ I told him stretching my already awake limbs. ‘Jeez why did I get the chick with all the athletic problems’ He said teasing me. I stuck out my tong before standing on one leg and wobbling slightly.

 

‘Oh and a little uncoordinated.’ He said chuckling softly. ‘You placed third in the bleep test. How are you at short sprints?’ He asked tilting his head to the side. ‘I’m quick in short bursts but not the quickest.’ I said, ‘Paul beat me at the bleep and the last final run. Even though I was ahead of him. ‘One has a guy, two longer legs, three he’s probably related to Usain bolt and four I wasn’t asking about him – I was asking you what you thought of yourself. I nodded and thought for a second as I bent to touch my feet. ‘Well he wouldn’t have just one long leg now would he?’

 

‘I used to jog and take off running randomly, I liked the feel of my heart suddenly accelerating and then slowing slightly. But after a while even my heart slowed down giving me less of a thrill – I think if I can get that thrill back I’d be much better than I am.’ I said after a longer thought. ‘Think of it this way then. Every time you run, you’re proving them wrong, thus not allowing them to extend your stay. Think of them like mean guards, bored and lonely. They want your company, the only way you’re going to get out is?’ He asked taking out an IPod from his pocket. He placed it in the speaker thing and a rock band I’d heard before came on. It wasn’t commercial or ‘popular’ but the lead singer didn’t sound like he’d smoked fifty cigarettes before singing either. He was one of the good ones who sing loudly but have amazing voices anyway.

 

‘Every time you run I want you to count. And listen for the bleep but you’re not against the noise. You’re against your own number. I nodded and jogged into place.

 

 

 

Chapter fourteen

Numbers that fill my mind

 

I ran as Cam shouted out 'Ten.’ Ten what? I was running a sixteen second run? ‘Other side now - you have ten seconds - go, go, go!’ He called out again. This lasted for about ten minutes, me running to the beep and him shouting out how long he wanted it to take me to run to the other side. ‘Stop!’ He called out suddenly. I slid to a stop nearly falling arse over tit. ‘You’re last run was half a second faster than your fastest time, recorded yesterday.’ He told smiling. ‘Why did you stop me then?’ I asked panting. ‘Cause you have like ten minutes to change.’ He told me glancing at his watch, I nodded and caught the smoothie he threw at me – I’d given him the old cup from yesterday a little whole ago.

 

I screwed off the lid and gulped half of the bottle in record time, the smooth cold drink. The taste was bazaar but wonderful. ‘Please don’t tell me what’s in here, it tastes so good I don’t want to know if something like raw eggs are in there.’ I said as I began walking out of the room. ‘Rose.’ He called after me, I turned my head waiting for a response. ‘It’s all natural fruit and some honey.’ I smiled and started jogging to my room. It took me five minutes to change my clothes, I left my room and began upbraiding my hair. I don’t quite remember when I’d braided it but it was curly now.

 

I reached the hall with minuets to spare, pulling my uniform into place. People were grabbing a plate of toasts, eggs, bacon, sausages, tomatoes and beans and if wanted a bowl of cereal or piece of fruit. Cam sat alone as he saw me he nodded to a spare tray of food. I walked over slowly as I finished my drink. I had no sausages or toast but I had some porridge. ‘Nommy’ I muttered happily picking up the wheat free bowl of food. He passed me my meds before I began eating hungrily. ‘I forgot to ask your likes or dislikes.’ He said looking at his own bowl of food with dislike. ‘You don’t have to eat the same as me.’ I told him smiling at the thought. ‘How can I expect you to function if I don’t know the food is enough or even edible.’ He replied steadily eating. ‘I dislike mushrooms, pork and erm any type of fish.’ I replied to his earlier question. ‘Cool, do you take any vitamins or minerals?’ He asked. ‘Vitamin c I guess.’

 

After finishing my breakfast I walked into one of the class rooms, they lined either side of the hallway leading away from the food hall. As I walked into the room labelled ‘English’ I could hear the sound of maybe beatboxing from the outside. A guy and a girl maybe? The first voice was heavy and masculine as I walked in I saw a dark skinned guy say ‘Awh I messed up’ He had hassle brown laughing eyes, his sister quickly took over. She laughed ‘Ya’ll all suck!’ She called out blasting her own beat out. Hers was like nothing else, she made sounds like gun fire – higher and lower in base. ‘Forgot I lived?’ Heavy breathing ‘Remember me die.’ She called out suddenly. ‘This is no battle, I beat you already.’ She called again, this time louder. ‘Capture that!’ She called again making a totally new sound. ‘Forget round two – I finished on that!’ she called lastly as she finished her turn.

 

Even though I knew nothing of beatboxing I knew she was good, really good. ‘You have a serious pair of lungs on you’ I told her as she stood up and bowed. ‘What cause I’m fat, you skinny bitch?’ She asked walking towards me. ‘You could have the same size lungs if you ran all day, I didn’t comment on your size but on your lungs.’ I told her rolling my eyes. ‘Oh yhea pick of the fat chick.’ She called out angrily. I sighed ‘Even if I say no you’re going to say that I offended you cause of your race next right? ‘Oh now it’s cause I’m a black beatboxer right’ no I would have said the same if you had a penis, if you liked girls or if you were ridiculously hot, if you were skinny or over weight. My point is you have a good set of lungs.’ I sighed and took one of the single desks near the window. Exactly the same, I thought sadly as I blasted music through my headphones.

 

A single female’s powerful voice commandeered my ears with only a guitar and her voice. She sung about what it was like when her other half left her, like she couldn’t breathe. Like the ocean was trying to carry her away. I smiled sadly and awaited the teacher’s entrance, ten minutes later an military looking man walked in. ‘Arses up, phones away we got us some competition folks. Cam seems to think our new delinquent can beat my fastest female athlete. I think we got ourselves a little bet!’ He called out laughing in my face.

 

‘Ha, her? She doesn’t fit in!’ The African American overweight girl called out. Cam stood behind the intruder looking sorry. I smiled softly at Cam, if he thinks I can do it then he better get me trained and ready. ‘Commander, you must give her a week – she’s just got here!’ He called out looking a little worried. I nodded at Cam saying I agreed. ‘In the Army we run on demand.’ He called out angrily. ‘Well are they asked the day they get there to run your fastest?’ I asked crossing my arms over my chest, and tilting my head to the side. ‘No, I suppose we don’t. You have a week kid.’ He called out before retreating with Cam.

 

English sucked, I could barely concentrate. I was too busy wondering how Cam was going to prepare me. Math’s sucked worse I hadn’t a clue what I was doing and I was too scared to ask. Biology was better, Science was something I understood. Law was all about legislation and boring shit I would have normally yawned my way through. Luckily taking notes was easy. First aid, however was interesting we covered the recovery position and how to resuscitate someone after an attack or fit of some kind.

 

I ran up to my room to find Lilly waiting for me, she smiled and waved as she entered her own room which was two doors from my own. After I changed, throwing all my ‘school clothes’ onto my bed I jogged over to Lilly’s I knocked before she shouted ‘Come in’. I opened the door as she was putting her hair into a pony tail, I quickly did the same to mine. ‘Heard Cam got you into a race.’ She called out looking interested. ‘Him and his big mouth.’ I laughed jogging down the stairs. ‘You think I’ll win?’ I asked curious. ‘Depends.’ She told me. ‘On?’ I asked. ‘Weather you want it bad enough.’ She replied with a devilish grin. ‘Who is the chick I’m running against anyway?’ I asked curious.

 

‘She was on some track team or something, won some big.’ She shrugged but didn’t look me in the face. A week to train? Could I win?

 

Chapter fiftten

 Dont blame him.

 

‘Camm!’ I groaned as I sat down next to him. ‘Shut up, I know!’ He replied passing me my tray full of healthy pasta (fun free pasta) ‘Not the pasta you douche, I can’t believe I’m racing in a week! What if I lose?’ I complained. ‘You won’t, pretty much everyone in this room wants you to beat that pretentious bitch.’ He told me sighing as he scoped some of the food into his mouth. ‘I’m serious!’ I complained shovelling food into my own mouth, Lilly sat down next to me sighing – she had a bagel with bacon. Damn.

 

‘Cam, what have you done now? And what the hell are you eating?’ Lincoln asked wrinkling his nose. I shot him an annoyed look. ‘Tell me about it.’ Cam muttered pushing his plate away – he threw me one of my meds. I sighed before dry swallowing it. I slowly ate my food as Cam and Lincoln discussed what techniques to use, apparently Lincoln hated her more than me. I got up pushing Cam my empty plate with a disgusted look on my face, did they need samples of my urine too? Maybe need some blood samples? They can screw themselves. I walked out of the room without another word. I had about fifteen minutes and a five minuet walk, I ran behind one of the buildings and hid for a little while, I just needed to feel like I wasn’t being watched for once. I had no signal or internet but I could listen to music which was good enough.

 

After a little while I sighed and sprinted to the gym, even I had to admit the feeling was good. For those two minutes I felt free and liberated, Lincoln stood by the door and let me pass by him before slamming the door closed. ‘It’s not fair that you blame him.’ He told me looking a little annoyed. ‘He’s trying to help you, you should treat him better.’ He said, who? Wait oh, he’d just seen me be rude to his brother. I nodded and walked inside.

 

Everyone stood in lines of five, the teacher at the front. He was the Military guy from before. ‘As you’ve all heard we’ve got a race coming up. But that won’t interfere with my weekly training sessions. Today we will warm up and then continue outside.’ He called getting into an easy stance. He punched one hand out and then the other but stood perfectly still. As soon as the first one came back to his chest he fired out the second, this carried on for some minutes until I didn’t think my hands could take the strain. ‘Now, stretch and prepare for the mile run to the outdoor training area.’ The many chorused moans, weren’t all that appeasing nor were they welcoming. After doing stretches we lined up to jog.

 

Which turned into an all-out sprint, which was okay – a normal mile was jogged in ten minutes, ours was run in seven. I ran neck and neck with Lincoln – Paul his easy first place came second behind the commander. In front of us stood a massive training field, complete with; logs for running up and down on ( led steeply in the direction of a climbing frame twice the size of the one I was training on yesterday, an even bigger rope, massive boats to carry into and out of the water, and people shaped punching bags all lined up.

 

‘There are twenty five of you. That’s five groups of five for all you imbiciles out there. There are five boats. So stand by your boats! Move your assess.’ I ran to the closest boat and stood by it as another four people scrambled to it next to me, somehow we managed to push and pull it into the air. ‘Hold it upp!’ He shouted, his green army trousers stood out. ‘March!’ He screamed and pointed to the other side of the beach.

 

We ran holding this stupidly heavy boat above out heads to the other side of the beach. ‘Get on in!’ He screamed. We threw down the boats and ran into the sea. ‘Pushups!’ He screamed. I can do this, I know I can. I held my breath and plunged under, breathing out and resurfaced and then let out a breath. ‘Ten. Nine. Eight, Seven, sex, five, four, three, two, one! Get your sorry asses out!’ He shouted, Next we led on the beach doing burpees soaking wet. ‘What are you doin, get your boats!’ He screamed. He had already started running down the other side of the beach. ‘Get on in!’ He screamed. ‘Don’t you even think of dropping your boats!’ He shouted.

 

‘You will stand, and you will hold your boats above your head. You will not fall!’ He called out, I looked out and saw Cam standing on the edge of the sand. The boat quickly filled up with water. My arms burned, my back screamed and my belly vibrated with barely controlled pain. I began counting silently in my head. ‘Any one of you can drop out anytime. Its okay if you do, you know that course over there isn’t so bad once you run it ten times. And the twentieth time isn’t all that bad, honestly you can all do that instead.’ He called out reasonably, smiling a sadistic smile. I shook my head.

 

60

120

180

240

300

360

420

580

640

700

760

 

Eleven minutes later, no one budged an inch. Each and every one of us would not be the one to drop. Another five minutes ‘Come on out!’ He shouted. Shivering I ran out of the water, I was drenched and shaking. I couldn’t seem to stand still. ‘Looks like we’re going to run us some course!’ He shouted almost sounding excited. I sighed and pulled my hair back into place.

 

I sighed, already exhausted. People were already sprinting up the massive logs, which led to the even bigger climbing frame. My muscles cried as I sprinted, I felt like jelly. Nearly falling down three times, I jumped down the other side. My leg muscles nearly collapsed underneath me. My arms shook as I hulled my tired body up. The other side was stupidly high, and there was only five ropes leading down. Each and every person fought to not be the last down. Around ten people were on one. My palms burnt as I let myself down. On the other side, there was hurdles people were already running over, on the other side stood a big muddy trench. Others looked a little hesitant but I knew I had to. Sprinting faster than before I ran right into the mud pit and crawled my way through. First.

 

‘Burpees in the water.’ I heard someone scream behind me, I looked back – Lilly. She looked at my grinning, I winked before running sloppily into the water. Jumping I crashed into the water. ‘Back to the beginning!’ She shouted again after I shouted my tenth drop. I nodded before sprinting back to the beginning. It felt like hours later when we were told to stop. Everything in me wanted to drop, fall apart.

 

‘And I thought I was in shape’ I panted leaning on Lilly, ‘What in all hells was that?’ I asked, she giggled. ‘Don’t worry you get used to it, plus it’s only once a week.’ She told me brightly. ‘Ugh too more hours.’ I complained. ‘No, it’s our free time now.’ She told me. ‘For you maybe.’ I replied pointing to Cam, he stood next to a tired looking Lincoln. ‘I train for two extra hours to ‘catch up’’. I informed. ‘Oh’ she made a sympathetic sound and walked towards the dorms waving sadly. ‘Lincoln, go save yourself.’ I joked, he shot me a half smile but nodded at the principle who looked at him angrily. ‘Oh did you do a no-no, I asked laughing. He snorted but said nothing. ‘He’s only here till the race.’ Cam told me jogging to the other side of the sea, where people weren’t gawking at us.

 

 

‘I’m sorry Rose but I’m going to have to train you like normal today, if you lose this bet no one here will let you live it down.’ He told me sheepishly. ‘Gee thanks O-wonderful trainer.’ I replied sarcastically. Running a little faster to catch up, I literally had no energy left. Barely enough breathe to sigh let alone run. ‘What kind of race?’ I asked as we got closer to the other side, I was already out of breath, knowing this place it wouldn’t be straight forward. ‘Knowing the commander it won’t be straight forward. But your performance today was great, a little too great this will be hard. He doesn’t like losing and Delilah has been training for so much longer than you have.’ Gee whiz I thought. ‘Yea but she’s a prena ballerina we’ll get em’. I told them confidentially, running faster than before – I sprinted faster than I ever had before. I had to show them I could do it.

 

 

Everything will come at a costs to ourselves.

Without this costs it wouldn’t be worth it.

It would be worth nothing.

Running doesn’t feel good physically at this level of tiredness.

No at this level of tiredness, everything hurts.

But with this pain you know you’re doing it right.

Any person can run. Anyone.

But not everyone can run through this amount of pain.

Giving up now would be much more painful,

Tomorrow I will wake up proud of myself.

Knowing I had given my all.

When all of my hurts are gone, all that remains is that final score.

So what is hurt? It is just a short passage for winners

Drown it all out with the sound of your heartbeat.

 

 

I had sprinted – given my all and I had won. I will not be stopped. I cannot be stopped. I fell to the ground, there was no place left to run. I had did it.

 

I led on the floor and grinned at the darkening sky. Two pairs of footsteps ran up beside me looking down worriedly I grinned and said quietly ‘Sometimes when I step out into the world, I don’t feel as good as I normally do. I have a banging head ache, I feel sick. But I know, I know that if I don’t pick up that weight, if I don’t run as far, as fast as I can - tomorrow I will be so much worse off. ‘I looked up and saw the commander looking down the beach at us, I sat up and waved grinning. ‘Ten percent skill, ninety percent luck.’ Lincoln said letting a hand down to help me up. ‘Man that felt good.’ I told them jumping up and down on the spot trying to get feeling back in my legs, ‘your insane’ Cam told me grinning and shaking his head. ‘You know the drill, water burpees, push ups and squat jumps’ He called out nodding into the ever cooling water.

 

With every breath I expelled I screamed the number I had accomplished. With every added number I became more and more sure I could do this, the voice in side my head screaming no was drowned out by my heart. By my unyielding will to say yes. With every added number the cold and the tiredness went away and adrenalin flooded in. I reached thirty. Thirty before Cam called out.

 

‘Right you can both go – but were hiking tomorrow at five to make up for the time lost.’ I nodded and smiled gratefully. Although I was a little wobbly, I could hardly walk – let alone think of running back. ‘Come-on.’ Lincoln called gently a little ahead of me, I nodded and speed up my pace a little – he grabbed my arm and we half ran and half stumbled back.

 

I woke up to someone shaking me, I could hear someone else rummaging around somewhere in the room. I jumped up in the dark room confused. ‘Who are you, where am I, and stay back in armed!’ I half shouted taking a wobbly step back. The floor beneath me sagged and someone grabbed my arm, suddenly a light was switched on. Eyes blinded I hit out ‘Ouch, Jeez it’s us!’ Lincoln’s voice called annoyed. Cam stood by my draws with my school uniform in one arm and a jogging uniform in the other. ‘Ugh, what time is this?’ I asked walking into the bathroom with the jogging uniform with me. I quickly changed and brushed my teeth, bleary eyed.

 

I walked back into my bedroom to find them both leaning against something drinking what smelled like coffee ‘Gi-me’ I called sweetly pulling a pouty face at Lincoln, he looked on deadpan. I turned to Cam and he passed me a mug he’d hidden on the bed side.

 

 

Chapter sixteen

Does 5 am really count as morning? Really?

 

We stood at the bottom of a hill, hills a stupid word for mountain of mud in front of us. ‘You’ve got two hours and… 15 minutes. But you probably want those to change. I’ll be here at the bottom, Go up all the way to the top. Run back down, don’t be late. When your trackers go off you really have to move or you’ll miss out on breakfast. And you’ll have to make your own excuses.’ I nodded and passed him my empty mug. ‘Good luck’ He called passing us both bags, they felt heavy and sloshed. Mine was purple and had a straw coming out of it, and this little stopper lever. It was filled with water. I quickly put the bag on my back and began jogging through the little forestry bottom of the hill, quickly jogging in and out of the randomly placed trees I began my trek up towards the top of the hill.

 

The floor was filled with due and slippery in places, it wasn’t so bad because every once in a while I felt the grip of a stone under my feet steadying me, it was like the world didn’t want me to fall. I smiled moving faster than before, tomorrow’s pains and worries walked away. After the first half hour my legs lost the unyielding wobbly feeling. My back lost its strain and feet lost their pulsating feeling. With every foot fall I felt stronger and more alive.

 

The sun slowly rose, and with it I knew I must move faster. I sped up and soon thereafter I broke the surface of the trees. I was at the top, the sun clearly rising its way up the horizon. I drank thirstily before turning tail and running downhill. Checking my phone I saw it was twenty to seven. Half an hour, fifteen minutes to change and a whole five minutes to run to the food court. I could see the path I needed to take down.

 

I ran down hill lengthening my stride to ensure I didn’t end up rolling down the hill ass over tit. Ten minutes in I was already out of breath and no way near the half way line, there was nothing else to do I needed to sprint. I saw Lincoln in front of me running down a much more dangerous path than my own, a much quicker incline but riddled with trees. I breathed in deeply (more like gasped) and jumped over a fallen log.

 

I thought of the twenty minutes I had to run. Instead of worrying I counted. It calmed me, focused my mind. It was almost like I wasn’t even looking where I was going anymore, my vision blurred but I trusted my feet to take me there.

 

Three minutes later, adrenalin called my name asking me to run faster, count faster. Doing so I found myself level with Lincoln. Looking right I could see him weaving in and out of trees, it was breath taking to see the amount of concentration it must have taken not to crash. Facing forward I pushed myself harder, leaping over fallen debris instead of jumping pathetically. I almost fell twice but rolled with the motion and continued forward. Mud caked my hands and feet but I felt liberated, I looked over just in time to see Lincoln gain his feet and wink before he sprinted forward again.

 

Seven minutes left. It’s on. I pushed myself into that impossible faster category. Quickly dodging a up and coming tree I skidded closer to Lincoln, nearly pushing him in to a tree. I quickly grabbed his hand and pulled hard to the left. Stumbling we sprinted past the trees. Unstoppable. Lincoln squeezed my hand before letting go but he stayed right at my side as soon as I began to slow down he urged me forward by going faster. I grinned devilishly as I sped up myself. He knew I was competitive, the scoundrel. I laughed mentally as my hair came undone and flew behind me in a mass of waves.

 

‘Five minuets’ I panted out, he nodded before slowing down a tad, I grabbed his arm and pushed us both faster. A minute later I let go to dodge an oncoming tree. Seconds later there was no more incline. We were on flat ground. ‘Whoo’ He yelled sprinting forward. I panted before falling back a little, he slowed down a little matching my pace. We’d made it. ‘Fifteen minutes to change, five to get there.’ I panted running over to Cam who sat lazily in a tree eyes closed listening to music.

 

I turned to Lincoln and put my finger to my lips. I slowly walked over to the tree and jumped up on to the lower branch. Suddenly Cam rolled over and caught my hand. ‘Argh!’ I screamed and he pulled me over to him. ‘Nice try.’ He said passing me my clothes. I grinned as he lowered me to the ground and then rolled over, and pushing off with his arms he landed on his feet with bent knees. I walked back into the forest a little and changed into the school skirt and shirt. My hands were filthy and I looked odd in my running shoes.

 

Breakfast was boring I was so tired I hardly remembered eating it. I remember walking somewhere but I don’t remember why. I stood with a phone in my hand listening to an idiot.

 

‘I’m sorry Rose I feel like this is partly my fault.’ His voice was sad, begging forgiveness. I had given up forgiving him, he no longer deserved it. I had ended up here, this academy because I needed ‘help’.

‘Partly? You jack ass, your bitch ass fake girlfriend spiked my drink and offloaded her drugs on me, and she probably fucking called the cops. Partly? You used me like a doll. I thought. I thought you were a brother. You were my best friend. ‘I half shouted, I looked around the cold quiet room, the receptionist looked at me angrily.

 

‘Okay, Okay so it’s mainly my point but I didn’t punch the teacher, I didn’t get drunk on campus or...’ I didn’t let him finish, he was right I did those things.

 

‘No your right, you didn’t force me to do anything you just ruined my life. Call me again and when I get out of here I’ll break your nose.’

 

I hung up the phone throwing it at the connection on the wall, I rested my head there for a minute before turning around facing a random guy who smiled genially at me. ‘Shall I come back?’ He asked already half turned. ‘Na its fine I’m done anyway.’ I murmured before walking towards the door, towards him. ‘You deserve better.’ He said after a second of silence. ‘Phaa, everyone deserves better than a fake ass betrayal, I’m Rose by the way.’ I said smiling softly. ‘Seth, were in like every class together.’ He told me winking. ‘That seems to be the common denominator round here. See you around Seth. ’ I replied laughing as I left the room, feeling a little better. English was next, I really needed a nap anyway.

 

I sighed as I walked into English, the Tv was already out. Great now were watching some crappy remake of a truly great book. I sighed taking a seat next to the window. Seth walked in smiling a couple of minutes later and took a seat on my right, I smiled and led on my arm. ‘Books much better right!’ He called out softly, smiling to himself. Lincoln strolled in whistling, he took a seat in front of me his head stuck in a book. Unconsciously he stood and opened the window.

 

When the teacher finally walked in (he was about seventy and bolding) he slowly painstakingly pulled the tv on wheels into the middle of the room. A modern remake of Romeo and Juliet, ‘Still a better love story than twilight’ Lincoln muttered to himself. ‘I actually thought twilight was alright. I think Stephanie Meyers is a really good writer. ‘I replied, thinking that that saying was so controversial. ‘Of course you’d think that’ he muttered turning around and rolling his eyes at me. ‘Says the guy who just said something so controversial, fifty idiots just thought LOL. Not that was funny or even haha. LOL.’ I replied rolling my eyes, he turned around and glared at me.

 

I sighed, two steps forward seven back. I leant forward, hearing him sigh I put my hand on his shoulder. ‘Hey you okay?’ I asked whispering. He shrugged me off and replied ‘Tired is all, haven’t slept in a while I guess.’ He muttered back leaning his head on his arms. I nodded even though he couldn’t see me, ‘I hope you sleep tonight.’ I whispered back as the Tv was turned on, I leant my head on my arm and looked at Seth.

 

He gave me an odd look and I only winked back in response. I saw lily and Dyson talking nearby, she blushed profoundly and looked my way, and I grinned before putting my head in my arms. I felt sleep stealing me before even the adverts began.

 

‘Hey, it’s time to get up.’ I opened my eyes to see Lilly shaking me, I yawned and saw Lincoln was still asleep. He talked softly to himself, I stood up on uncertain legs and walked towards me, and Lilly looked at me concerned but said nothing. I knelt down towards him and shook his arm gently. ‘Hey, Link. Get up.’ I told him softly. ‘Link?’ He said looking tired but amused. I laughed and pulled on his arm. ‘Were goanna be late.’ I told him softly. ‘Hey, I-I want to say sorry. I was kinda rude.’ He told me looking a little embarrassed. ‘Were not alone.’ I whispered, a little amused myself.

 

‘Fuck. See this is why I’m a dick.’ He whispered tilting his body around me, looking at Lilly and Dyson standing behind me. ‘Anyway, I was talking to Lilly and was wondering if you two wanted to come to my party, Seth’s brother to sneak some booze in last Visiting.’ He said grinning like a crazed man. ‘Sure you did. Plus me and Cam decided to take Rose to the lake tonight.’ Lincoln said looking round a little worried. More training great, I mentally sighed.

 

‘Come on we all know you’re training her, plus it’s after I checked with Cam – you can both go.’ I sighed aloud this time. ‘Can I go to sleep there?’ I asked yawning and unconsciously leaning on Link, he looked down at me a little worriedly but didn’t more away. ‘Hard night?’ Lilly asked a little worried. ‘Na the whole six am wake up thing sucks – insomniac, anxiety. Ya’ll know the norm.’ I said winking at Lilly. She giggled and said ‘Hate to say it but were goanna be late to math.’ Gosh I hope it’s another movie. ‘Doubt it.’ Lincoln said ‘Am I that readable?’ I asked no one in particular. ‘Naa, Lincoln’s kind of a mind reader.’ Dyson said grinning. ‘Don’t lie, you were talking out loud Rose.’ Lilly said as we walked from the room and to maths. ‘I. Hate. Math.’ I groaned with each foot step.

Chapter seventeen

'That’s why theirs booze.'

 

Dyson said smiling.  'I hate to say this, but I can’t be caught drinking. Like at all, I’m on the shit list.' I said sighing sadly. ‘Rose you can’t miss this.’ Lilly said whining. ‘Look, you’ve all been here a while. You all know what you’ve done and you’re paying it off. They’ll forgive you. I've been here four mere days; I can’t be seen drinking, my life’s already messed up enough because of me. Sorry to sound like a bore but the only way I can deify them is to beat Delilah, and drinking won’t help me wake at stupid am.’ I told them walking into the math room. The class hadn’t started yet, I quickly found my seat and began working on complicated math problems.

 

I groaned and laid my head on my desk confused. ‘Stupid math. Stupid. Stupid.’ I said banging my head lightly on the desk. I stopped banging my – knowing I looked like a crazed buffoon.

 

A note landed on my desk, next to my head. ‘You can go you know, and what you’ve done it isn’t all that bad. I’ve read reports ten times worse than yours and that’s just the ‘norms’.’ I looked around the room confused. I crumpled the note up confused. ‘Don’t pretend to know me.’ I said aloud to no one in particular. Another note landed on my desk. ‘I know about your brother.’ Fuck you. No, you don’t get to bring him up. I stood up abruptly, ‘Sir I need to go to the bathroom.’ I said but before he could half utter a response I left the room.

 

How could they know about my brother? My sweet, poor brother. I sighed having no idea where the bathroom was, Lincoln stuck his head out of the class room and pointed across the hall three doors down, and I nodded and walked away.

 

I opened the bathroom door and stood facing my reflection. My twin brothers face stared back at me, it wasn’t my fault I know that. But everything he went through burrowed a hole so deep in my chest it burnt every time I breathed too deeply. He was the reason I ran, he was the reason I did anything. We used to do everything together, I learnt piano and him guitar. He, older than me by mere minuets, was the favourite but his shadow was a nice one to walk in.

 

We were running partners years before we learnt to walk, my mother used to say we physically couldn’t walk anywhere. He used to joke that he didn’t need a shadow, he had me. He was Liam’s true friend, if my brother was still here right here with me Liam would never have betrayed me. Jase worked at the hospital as an care assistant where my brothers body lay in the hospital bed. It had been months now, in a couple weeks it would have been six months.

 

My vision blurred and eyes sparkled, exhausted tears ran down my face. I hadn’t cried in months, not like this. Not for anything. I sighed and washed my face, I was okay. My brother wasn’t dead. He was in a coma – shrapnel from a car explosion had pierced his heart, on impact he had hit his head hard. But that should all be okay now. He should have woken up but he hadn’t.

 

1. 2.   3.   4.   5.

 

I am okay. I am fine, he will live. I whispered to myself, I looked back in the mirror and saw myself. A little pale and gaunt but it was me. I nodded to my reflection before returning to class. I didn’t receive any more note nor did I utter another word. Science was much of the same; we had focused on chromatography, which was basically which pen leaked the most colour furthest from the initial water line. It was a tedious colourful mess.

 

Law wasn’t even worth mentioning, no one talked to me. I didn’t try to talk to them. I don’t even remember what we learnt. I’m pretty sure that we learnt how to administer needles in first aid, best places to administer adrenalin – or any kind of epi pen. Heart for adrenalin and thy for epi pen. We even had fake needles to practice getting the air bubbles out of them. We were even given sharps boxes. How fun, I thought sarcastically. Oh joy my sarcasm is back.

 

All the fun people are insane. I thought melodramatically .

 

I walked to gym with little if any enthusiasm. My black mood surrounded me like the plague. An inky, endless blackness. I sighed and held my head high. Cam was already leaning against a table with our food, some kind of soup and fun free brown bread with seeds. I sighed to myself and swallowed my pill and shoved my headphones in my ears. I just didn’t want to talk right now, I took my pill and ate in silence. The soup was tasteless and bread - like a sponge. And not in the absorbent way, more like a dried in the sun one.

 

I stretched my back and my neck, I clicked all my knuckles before walking back to my room alone. I saw Seth but ran past him and sprinted into my room. My dirty clothes lay outside of my room, Cam had left them there. I threw them in the laundry bin and changed into clean ones. I put my hair into a simple pony tail before walking to the gym. Cam stood in the corner looking at me a little concerned. I hated that look. Detested it. That look deserved a bath in bleach riddled crocodile water. I thought smiling a little. I walked to the middle of the room, throwing my phone to Cam. He nodded smiling a little, least I wasn’t hiding right?

 

‘Pair up, stretch and spa. I’m too busy for you lot right now!’ Our little nuts teacher called from a supply closet. I walked up to Lincoln quietly, stretching out my hamstring I heard him mutter. ‘I’m not sorry.’ I nodded, I thought it might have been him. I put my hands on the floor and walked them forward. I continued stretching – thinking. ‘How many have read it?’ I asked. ‘I don’t know, but only me and Cam have read your medical and psych records.’ Translation; only me and cam know about your brother. I nodded a little relieved, the less the better – right?

 

     I got into a defensive position, weird thing was – this session wasn’t too bad. Maybe he wasn’t working me as hard. Maybe I was getting better. Stronger. I even got a hit to his face in – which even I had to admit felt amazing. After an hour of profoundly sweaty boxing, we began working on knee, elbow and kick shots. Which was fun – I even got to kick a little portable little hand punching pad. Everything was a little numb and red on the skin that hit the bag but it felt good to hit something. At the end of the session I was smiling. Three hours of learning to hurt something makes you smile just a little.

 

‘Come on, we’ve got a date with the beach.’ Cam called passing me back my phone. ‘Erm, water.’ I called passing it back, he gave me a look but put it back in his pocket. We jogged there slowly, it was nice to take it slowly for once. ‘Come on shoes off.’ Lincoln called pulling his trainers off grinning like an idiot. ‘What? My feet are gross!’ I called looking embraced, I looked down at my shoed feet disgusted. ‘That’s the point princess Rosa, the sand will brush away all dead ‘gross’ skin.’ He called rolling his eyes, he yanked up the legs of his jogging bottoms – the elastic on them both making it possible.

 

I bent down and removed my shoes and odd socks, my feet looked like little frozen sausages. I giggled before shoving my feet deep into the sand. I sighed as the smooth sand slid over my feet. ‘Come on princess, let’s get a move on!’ Lincoln shouted much like the commander had. I laughed before running after him, Cam stood back looking amused and a little cold. He was drinking a cup of something warm; something I was half inclined to steal. I ran instead, coffee slows down your metabolism remember Rose.

 

The sand was scolding cold and just as rough but it felt strangely wonderful. Suddenly it started raining, not like a gentle caress but an insane downfall. It was wonderful, like a serious deep tissue massage. I think they called it a Haikou? Or is that a lymric, erm maybe a Chinese poem. I don’t know. I’d look it up on the internet but it seems there is none. ‘Oh no my shoes!’ I thought suddenly. ‘What’s the matter you have more right?’ Lincoln asked. ‘Sure I do, like one pair – there all soaked! I was only given three, the first is mud clogged, and second sand drenched and the third is now saturated.’ I replied huffing as I ran. ‘Such colourful words.’ He called back turning and sprinting back. ‘Hey!’ I called racing after him. ‘We all know I’m faster!’ I shouted back laughing.

 

An hour of sprinting back and forth later, Lilly came running over. ‘Hey – Master said you can go in!’ She shouted shivering a little, she wore a blue rainmack that covered her from head to knees. I laughed and nodded soaked, I was so cold even my bones shook. Grabbing my shoes and damp phone I ran inside, to cover.

 

I showered and combed my insanely knotted hair, I threw on a light blue jumper with dark blue and white writing decorating it. I threw on some red skinny jeans that had like seven different pockets, I shoved on my boots not even bothering to tie them - they hung loosely and flashed my stripy thick socks. I sighed and threw myself onto my bed, for the first time here - I had forty free and nothing to do. I wondered out down the stairs and made my way into the canteen, I walked through the barren canteen and through past to the class rooms.

 

Opposite the English room was a library – Well that’s what it said above the door. I walked into the empty, warm but quiet room and looked around. The smell of old books quickly over powered my senses, it was such a beautiful room. Old, like from the war old. It was covered with old pictures and uniforms, the bookshelves were ancient. Beautiful oak, carved with such an intricate pattern. I sighed happily and picked up the closest book to me ‘much ado about nothing.’ I remember it was about love, some betrayal. The youngest daughter was thought to have been cheating before her wedding day – but to prove her innocent she had to play dead. It was a very interesting and old story.

 

I smiled sitting down and began to lose myself in the pages, of the old story. By the time people had begun arriving in the room next door I had already so close to finishing. Standing up I clicked my back and walked into the other room, my eyes still focused on the book before me I chose a random table and sat down. I hardly took notice as someone sat across from me, coughing. I said ‘hey’ but was too focused on reading to really be interested in the person across from me. ‘Seems like a good book.’ Seth called looking at me amused when I lifted my head up. ‘It’s different.’ I said thinking deeply.

 

‘What do you mean?’ He asked looking interested in what I had to say. ‘Well for starters people don’t fall in love in seconds it’s just not plausible, but in this its different people were forced to marry. Even in the ‘good’ families, with the kind father’s people were forced to marry their daughters away. Much unlike Juliet’s parent’s – Parent. Heroes farther didn’t want to give her away and was deeply upset when he thought her in pain – even when he was angry. It’s just nice.’ I finished lamely.

 

‘Ugh, Lincoln gotten to you hasn’t he.’ Cam said sitting down with our meals, he pushed me over a pasta dish (fun free might I add, translation free from). ‘Naw I’m literature’s bitch I’m afraid.’ I told him grinning before turning back to my book, from the corner of my eye I saw him roll his eyes. Lilly and Dyson walked over looking to be in deep conversation, ‘Where’s Lincoln?’ I asked not seeing him at our table, and raising an eyebrow at Seth’s presence. ‘Probably with his friends.’ Cam replied looking round too. ‘Ohh he has friends!’ I replied giggling, just then he walked in talking to a tall brunet girl – she was seriously tall and tanned. ‘I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have friends.’ Dyson said winking. ‘Shut up D, your best friends!’ Lilly said laughing, she took a tentative bit of her burger and pulled a face.

 

‘Man your lucky your fun free! This is gross!’ She called out quietly, she drank half her bottle of orange juice looking grossed out. ‘Ugh, never say that until you live the fun free life.’ Cam said looking sadly at her burger, she quickly grabbed his plate and gave him hers. She took one bite of the pasta and smiled softly. ‘Much better.’ She called eating hungrily, Cam sent me a sorrowful look before taking a huge bite of his burger. Lincoln walked over smiling like a man who had accomplished something. ‘Ohh that’s your – I would totally tap, that face.’ Dyson called out loud enough for the brunet to hear, in response she flicked her hair and swayed her hips. Lincoln only raised an eyebrow and leaned back in his chair.

 

I snorted totally unlady like, ‘He’s right don’t play poker any time soon, Lincoln.’ I replied. ‘Attractive.’ Seth called sitting by me. ‘So you all know, I don’t tap peoples face.’ I choked on my food and covered my face doing multiple snorts at once (I don’t mean the sounds pigs make, it’s like I don’t even know what it’s like...) Seth gently patted my back, ‘you okay?’ he asked softly looking concerned. ‘Bones’ I replied with tears in my eyes. Lincoln reached over and grabbed my hand placing his drink in it. I quickly drank some and returned it to Lincoln.

 

I rolled my shoulders effectively removing Seth’s hand from my back. His hair was a dirty blond cut close to his scalp and eyes a soft blue. Stubble covered his cheeks in a light dusting, he was attractive but I didn’t know him. ‘You coming to Dysons party?’ He asked his eyes boring into mine. ‘Na, I have work to catch up on.’ It was a half lie, I did have to catch up on work but I kind of just wanted to be alone for a while. He smiled softly and nodded, he turned and entered a weird staring contest with Lincoln who seemed to be more interested in leaning back on his chair. Suddenly it tipped over and Lincoln ended up sprawling on the floor, he quickly rolled with the force and ended up three steps behind the table. He stood from the crouching position with a look of fire in his eyes.

 

 

 

 

Chapter eighteen

 Eyes of white fire

 

I quickly ran to his side, and looked into his eyes. Which were non-moving from their target. Seth. Electric seemed to fly from them, his eyes almost glowed. This close I could see the line of black that ringed them. Even spilled into his eyes a little. Part blue part black. I swallowed and slowly walked over to him. 'Link, don’t.' I whispered knowing it wasn't worth it. He wasn't mad, he looked psychotic. ‘All the best people are crazy.’ I whispered to him, recounting what I’d said to myself earlier. ‘But not like this.’ I grabbed his hand and pulled until he looked down into my own eyes. ‘Not here.’ I whispered feeling eyes on us all. The lighting was bad, I knew my pupils were dilated showing all of my freaky eyes for him to see.

 

His own eyes darted from one to the other in quick succession. Eventually he nodded and smiled slowly. ‘What is it with you Rosa?’ He said, well at least he didn’t say Princess this time, squeezed my hand once before letting it go. I shifted seats away from Seth and took the free one next to Lilly – the seat opposite Seth. Thus forcing Seth to leave or putting Lincoln to my right. One across and right from Seth. Silently he sat in the seat raising an eyebrow at me. Before he could sit down I nudged him and he nearly became a sprawl on the floor once again. Instead he caught himself and jumped behind my chair pulling it and me backwords. I giggled and jumped up, grabbing his new allocated chair I sat down.

 

Seth send Lincoln another glare before standing up and leaving. He hadn’t even bothered to take his tray with him. I quickly ate the rest of my food and placed the plates above one another. The drinks on the same try and then the tray under neither the loaded one. I stood and left taking my book with me. Freedom. ‘Hey’ Seth called from the hallway. I sighed and turned towards him. ‘Yes?’ I asked a little annoyed, I had to work with Lincoln and Cam every day, and I didn’t want to piss them off by talking to this… I didn’t want to think of an insult in case I myself was being the idiot. Opse.

 

‘Look I…’ He didn’t finish, he scratched his head and looked over my shoulder. I took one step back preparing to look behind me. ‘Darling what have I told you of playing with the delinquents?’ Cam asked putting his arms around my torso. ‘Well…’ He didn’t finish. ‘You really don’t remember?’ He said with clear delight in his eyes. ‘I said I’d have to beat them up. Sweetie please do be careful, you know what I get like when I don’t get my way. No one likes it when I’m unhappy.’ He replied putting his face into my neck. He licked it and I couldn’t help but giggle – it was supper gross. I turned around and shot him a glare, he only winked and walked passed the star struck Seth. ‘You’re an idiot. A possessive, weird idiot.’ I told him wiping my neck with vigour. ‘Lincoln’s right you are a princess.’ He told me grinning like an idiot. I rolled my eyes and walked away from him, I wanted my alone time. I would fight nail and tooth for it.

 

I felt like I was going to explode I couldn’t take any more drama. From exploding teens, from drugs, to my brother. I know I brought this on myself, well most of it. I knew blaming others wouldn’t help me in the long run but I hadn’t done it all. I was innocent. Guilty until proven innocent right.

I walked and walked not looking where I was going, the tears again. I couldn’t take it anymore. I felt like screaming it from the highest ridge, the lowest cloud. They deserved to know. I was innocent. Tears fell like the unstoppable force they were. I started running I couldn’t stand it anymore, I couldn’t stand life. It was stupid. I was lost and alone but running made me feel better. Turned my scars into paper cuts. I was too young to throw my life away, I knew that. But that didn’t stop me from wishing I could some days. I found myself in a grave yard, I slowed to a walk staring at the trees, blowing in the wind. Trees were never upset, never worried. Their biggest troubles were because of humans. I walked up to the first grave, it was old and covered in leaves.

 

I wiped my tears away and brushed away the dirty dust that covered the front of the grave. ‘Anglia Prescott. 1997 – 2014.’ She was a year younger than me, at seventeen she died. ‘True friends stab you in the front.’ Was written across her grave stone, I smiled sadly and continued cleaning her grave. It cleared my head for some strange reason. I stood after pulling all the weeds away and continued my walk through, careful not to step on any graves. I walked and walked, grave after unfamiliar grave. It was peaceful.

 

When I reached the last of the graves I walked further and further away from the school. I managed to find myself in another forest. The trees barely a hairs breathe apart. The browns clashed together and greens above all else stood starkly out. The darkness was slowly falling all around me and fog seemed to come with it, the moon rose slowly and lit my path. I was not afraid of the dark. Nothing out here can hurt me. But on the same note no one wanted to hear me cry, no one wanted to feel my pain. I started running again, the tranquillity never lasts long.

 

I ran into the darkness welcomed it, the dark was my only friend. Because darkness was only the absence of light. If I ran here during the day time I would see the exact same, nothing was different out here. I ran until my heart felt like it wanted to explode, I ran until my feet turned into lead, I ran until every breath was like a sharp piercing pain to my throat and then I ran further.

 

I stopped at the sound of water splashing against more water, the river? I asked myself wondering if this is where Lincoln and Cam were going to take me before. I stopped and lay my hands in the water that never could be caught in a human. Dripping through my fingers I watched fascinated, well that was until I heard the crows caw. I heard someone moving quickly through the forest and directly in my direction. I walked silently over to a tree and then the next. Until I couldn’t hear the running over my own heartbeat. Only then did I allow myself to run like hell back through the forest. The forest didn’t seem friendly any more, it seemed more like a forgotten land. Beautifully dangerous, I didn’t hate the dark nor did I fear it. But I knew, well presumed, what happened to girls left in the forest when she was surrounded by delinquents. Even if I was one, I knew when it was time to be aware of something.

 

I remember a quote from Ryan Pitts – Courage is not the absence of fear; it is the ability to move forward in the face of it. He was a famous soldier in the American army, I knew he was given a medal of honour but I never knew why. I am and forever will be my own light in the darkness. I sprinted through the forest seeing the trees only seconds before I nearly smashed into them. I heard the stranger grunt before turning tail and running straight at me.

 

I am fine, I will be fine. I am faster than anyone here, no one will catch me.

 

Doubt crept into my mind when I thought of the off chance it was Paul chasing me, if it was he would have already caught me. I thought rationally, I am faster. I will not give in, it’s not in my nature nor will it ever be. My chaser cussed and tried to run faster, I heard him gaining but I was already at the head of the first (or last) grave. I leaped over it apologising profoundly. I looked around but there were no more, the ground beneath my feet was squishy, no one was here. I wasn’t at the grave yard, I was on the beach. I couldn’t see inches in front of my face, nothing was evident. I could hear my could be stalkers breath puffing out behind me. The quiet shushing sound of the sea nearly froze me in my tracks. The smell of sault calmed me. Home.

 

I turned away from the sound and sprinted away from it. Ten minutes, if I can last ten minutes then I will make it. I stumbled on the sand moving too quickly, falling to my knees I quickly scrambled forward. I ran and ran until my feet hit gravel, slipping I fall face first. Putting my hands down stopped the force - my hands, elbow and knee weren’t feeling so lucky. I could feel the gravel stuck in my palm, the blood spilling down my arm and knee. It pushed me forward, they throbbed and the blood spilled faster but I needed to be safe. I needed to be free.

 

I sprinted in the direction of the boarding rooms, when I saw them in the distance I nearly slowed down. Nearly.

Chapter ninteen

You can choose your friends, not your fears

 

I burst through the doors with so much force I thought I was going to run the door down. No one was in the lobby, tears ran down my face. I wasn’t safe yet, but I also wasn’t sure I could run any more. The half run half limp up the stairs was horribly painful, on the second floor I was ready to keel over. I quickly pored as much energy as could into concerning the second set of stairs. At the top of them stood Lincoln. I limp ran straight into his arms, not caring if anyone else was around. I sobbed uncontrollably in to his shoulder, his arms automatically rapped themselves around my frozen, shaking bloody body.

 

‘Hey, hey shh. What’s wrong?’ He whispered stroking my hair. I shook my head unable to respond, my teeth chattered audibly. ‘Let’s get you warmed up.’ He said almost to himself, he picked me up and carried me to a random room. I closed my eyes uncaring, I knew I was safe. At least for a little while.

 

He opened the door of his room with a struggle and walked in, his room could have been the twin of mine. Cleaner and different covers but still. He placed me down on his bed rapping a midnight blue comforter around my shoulders. He walked over to the door and closed it quietly, he turned and walked slowly over to my terrified form. He walked over to his draws and grabbed a plain red jumper, he handed it out to me pointing out my dew and sweat drenched jumper. I nodded jerkily and tried to pull my own jumper up but my fingers were too cold.

 

He sighed at my pitiful attempt and pulled up my jumper for me, he turned as I managed to pull my own tee shirt off. I pulled his jumper on top of my bare skin still shivering. I pulled up the sleeve trying not to get blood on Lincoln’s jumper, I stood up and walked dazed into Lincoln’s bathroom. I pulled up the trouser leg of my ruined running trousers, I looked at the bloody gash feeling nothing but numbness.

 

I didn’t fear blood, it was natural. I watched as it slowly fled my body and ran down my calf. I stood there unsure of what to do. ‘I was being chased.’ I told him, turning I watched his expression turn to confusion to anger. ‘I fell…’ I told him looking down at the gash that never seemed to stop bleeding. He nodded and passed me a flannel. I put the toilet seat down and sat feeling a little sick. ‘He – he was right behind I could feel his breath, hear his curses.’ I felt shocked at my own words I sounded calm, monotone in fact. Emotionless.

 

‘How do you know it was a he?’ He asked a little offended. ‘His voice was deep.’ I told him offhandedly. ‘Did you recognise it?’ He asked grabbing another flannel and after widening it he pressed it to my elbow. My eyes watered as the pain set in but I didn’t move. ‘No. How will we know who it was?’ I asked a little worried. ‘Easy, any delinquent not at the party is noticed.’ He replied smiling a little, at my expression he stopped. ‘What if it wasn’t one of them?’ I asked quietly. ‘What do you mean?’ He asked a little confused. ‘You’ve all been saying since the challenge was spoken, lots of people didn’t want Delilah to win. ‘I replied thinking deeply. ‘What’s that got to do with this?’ He asked. ‘Well if practically everyone here wants her to loose, everyone there doesn’t want to be shown up by some new girl with a week’s training.’ I replied off handily.

 

‘Makes sense.’ He replied shrugging, ‘Do you think you’ll still be able to run?’ He asked a little worried. ‘Damn right.’ I replied feeling better. He smiled, never before had I seen such a bittersweet smile. Dimples and all. ‘Two days down, five to go.’ I groaned, Lincoln turned around and began filling the sink with antiseptic soap and warm water. ‘Hands.’ He called already grabbing one and shoving it in. I glared at him and tenderly put the second (free) hand in. ‘Elbow.’ He called already making a grab for it, before he could shove it in I stood up and knocked his hip with mine. Putting my own elbow in the water.

 

‘Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch.’ I chanted good naturally smiling a little as the soap numbed my arm again. I sighed as the pain ebbed away, Lincoln was already on his knees cleaning the dirt and blood away with an antiseptic wipe. I cried out as he wiped over a stone stuck in my flesh. He quickly removed it and carried on.

 

He searched around his bathroom until he found a plaster, it was stupidly defaced with a skull and cross bone. Bright fricking pink. ‘Sorry, there my little sisters.’ He replied blushing, I chuckled and took my arm and hands out of the water, he quickly took one of my hands in his looking for cuts or stones to remove when he found none he moved to the other. He smiled before gently grabbing my arm, and inspecting it before dabbing the damn thing dry. Gotta  admit I didn’t enjoy that part.

 

I sighed as he finally applied the last bandage. ‘Thankyou Lincoln.’ I whispered looking into his calm eyes, calm before the storm my mind whispered to me. ‘Come on, let’s get you warm.’ He told me pulling me back into the other room, I hadn’t even realised I was shivering again. He pushed me gently on to his bed and grabbed a laptop from the corner of the room. ‘Whatta we watching?’ I asked intrigued he just grinned and asked me to shuffle over.

 

Kicking off my shoes I did so. He opened the screen and pushed off his own shoes, pulling his single pillow up he sat up straight. I moved closer and rested my head on his shoulder. As soon as he typed in his password a picture of a dude hanging off a cliff with only a support line to hold him, in the back ground the sun was setting turning the whole picture in to orange, black and blue hues. It was beautiful.

 

‘You climb?’ I asked generally intrigued. ‘Yea, my sister took the picture it was the first time I took her with me. She moaned the whole way, but finally when the sun set I’d never seen her happier she told me where to go and when we got home she passed me a bunch of photos this was the best.’ He told me grinning like a little boy who’d gotten just what he’d wanted.

 

He clicked on something called the ‘Russian sleep project?’ I said aloud it came out a question. As soon as the voice started its speech I shivered moving closer to Lincoln, at the end I sat there frozen. ‘Well I’m no longer afraid of Casper the friendly stalker.’ I muttered in a high pitch. ‘Mission accomplished’ he called out smiling, he turned to my not so smiley face and frowned. ‘As interesting as that was, next time it’s movie night – I’m picking.’ I told him shuddering once. He chuckled and chose a track to play and put his laptop on the floor, a man sung – I recognised his voice. He was really good at singing but if I remember correctly he’s usually screaming.

 

Chapter twenty

 My story

 

I hummed along smiling softly, Lincoln shifted until he was lying flat. I kept myself upright for a few seconds before lying down with him. ‘Did your mother ever sing you to sleep?’ I asked turning my face towards his. ‘Yea when I was little I guess why?’ He asked closing his eyes. ‘Mine never did, she used to sing for Dillon sometimes. When I had nightmares he was the one singing.’ I smiled remembering his high pitched child’s voice and then when he grew older his stronger sadder voice. He was going to play at a bar the night it happened.

 

‘I remember reading that you played the piano, you any good?’ He asked. ‘I can play.’ I replied shrugging, ‘you play anything?’ I asked. ‘Yea, the wickedest air guitar.’ He replied trying to attempt it and nearly falling off his bed. I laughed so hard and nearly fell off the other side. ‘That was truly spectacular.’ I replied. ‘Now you have to play for me.’ He replied grabbing my arm before I fell, I shook my head. ‘No deal’ I said shaking my head venomously. I hadn’t played since Dillon’s accident. ‘Come on – no fare I nearly fell trying to play for you.’ He said pouting, I couldn’t help it I laughed at him. ‘Maybe if you can find a piano.’ I replied cautiously. ‘Consider it done.’ He replied grinning mischievously.

 

Suddenly the track changed into one of my favourite bands, live I recognised the song and the entry speech. I began singing and bobbing my head grinning, I felt eyes on me and turned to see Lincolns shocked face. ‘What?’ I asked innocently. ‘How do you know this song?’ He asked generally interested. ‘Cause I was there.’ I replied, the song wasn’t one of the most popular but it was the one I loved the most. He shook his head with an honest to god baffled look on his face. ‘What?’ I asked laughing.

 

‘It’s just that your supposed to be this nice, honest piano playing girl who messed with the wrong pills on the wrong night and got caught.’ He replied. ‘You know, that’s just bullshit. I never was someone who took drugs. I was drugged. And my music taste has nothing to do with my being here.’ I replied angrily ready to leave. ‘Don’t leave yet. Look, I’m sorry I seem to have become a dick again.’ He whispered sheepishly, grabbing my hand and pulling me back on to his bed.

 

‘Do you want to talk about it?’ He asked in a way that was less curious and more concerned. So I told him, it just started rambling out. I hadn’t told anyone this before, not even Jase. I blew out a big breath and began. ‘I-I guess this all started the night of my brothers accident. I - no we were going to a bar, his band was playing and he promised to take me along. Mum wouldn’t say anything, she couldn’t I was with him. He was more of the mother figure to me than she ever was. Any way on the way there we hit a storm, we seemed to be the only ones out there. Wind and rain battered the car as we turned up the mountain side. The road was unstable always had been, Lightening was striking all over the place. Something blew in front of the windscreen, both of us sat there screaming at this stupid newspaper open and fluttering in the air. He swerved to the other side of the road, and we sat there laughing, little did we know we were seconds away from being rammed straight into the safety rail.

 

My brother’s door nearly crushed him alive, his heart was punctured and he hit his head pretty hard. Another piece of metal lodged itself into my arm forcing me into place.’ Tears leaked down my face as I moved his jumper away just below shoulder bone and close to the side of my armpit sat the horrible puckered straight scar. ‘They got to us pretty quick, the metal didn’t go all that far into my arm after a few stiches I was fine. Concussion and nothing else. I walked around the hospital aimlessly looking for him, hours later he was taken out of the OR. They said he’d be in a comer for some time. They had to drug induce one or something so the swelling in his brain would go down. Months later and he’s sill not fine. My friends used to joke the wrong twin was in the comer me loving my sleep and him loving life an all. Ever laugh was like someone lighting a little part of my heart on fire.

 

Eventually I had enough of embracing the pain, so I gave them all up. That was until Jase came along forcing me to be his friend. He was the only one not asking questions, he works in the hospital where Dillon is now. He never spoke like he wasn’t here anymore, he was the only one.’ I sighed, next part of my story. ‘We had a best friend when we were little. His name was Scott. His farther learned that he was gay and he threw him out.

 

I asked him if he needed a place to stay and he quickly agreed. During lunch he has a fight and we left. We ended up falling asleep to movies. My parents caught us asleep and wanted me to go to therapy at this point it was enough they’d been trying to get me to go to one for months I lost it. I went to Jases and we got completely fucked. Next day we turned up totally bladdered still, after having a fight with Katie his fake ass girlfriend I accidently hurt a teacher. Not that I knew at the time. I think she’d hit me the night before, so I gave her a black eye.’ Sighing I continued on explaining the drugs and the prison visit as best as I could. Lincoln laughed, actually laughed at me. ‘You truly are innocent.’ He told me fluffing my hair, ‘no I beat a teacher up and gave some posh chick a black eye. I’m like half innocent.’ I replied laughing a little.

 

He turned on his side and attacked my stomach with tickles until I couldn’t breathe. I giggled, and screeched until he put his hand over my mouth – which I automatically licked and it was gross it tasted like antiseptic hand wash. ‘Shh it’s late.’ He whispered not taking his hand from my mouth until I nodded. I’d really been running for that long? I’d been here for around an hour, what if I’d gotten caught. I really need to watch my timing when I went for a jog.

 

 

A darker song came on, screaming I need help. I rolled over laying my head on his shoulder. Yawning I asked him a question n. ‘Why are you here’ I asked already falling to sleep. ‘A story for another night.’ He whispered as my eye lids became heavy. I nodded and aloud myself to fall asleep. The sound that broke through my barrier of sleep was Lincoln’s own yawn. ‘Night.’ I whispered. ‘Sweet dreams.’ He whispered back resting his head on mine. 

 

 

Chapter twenty one

 Seriously again, five am? Who does this?

 

I rolled drowsily and a chuckled echoed in my ears. My head banged something pretty hard and I groaned opening my eyes. Music played softly, where was I and who was I with? Was it Scot had I dreamed this whole thing? Was it Jase or even Dillon? My heart soared at all the possibilities, but the only smiling face that met mine was Lincolns. ‘Shut up I’m sleeping.’ I muttered hiding my head in his neck. ‘Ahh the princess is awake.’ He teased good naturally.

 

‘Shh’ was my only half reply. I yawned as I looked out the window. It was pitch black still. ‘What time is it?’ I asked sitting up confused. ‘Five am and we have training.’ He replied sitting up and folding his arms across his chest. ‘No. It’s Saturday that’s ludicrous! Who trains of weekends?’ I asked almost sobbing. ‘We do.’ He replied in a sing song voice. ‘Wait a minute is that snow or rain outside?’ I asked more than a little concerned for my well feet, hands, you know whole body. ‘Rain I think.’ He replied after a minuet of careful listening.

 

I sighed ‘How long till Cams here telling me to get my lazy ass outta bed?’ I asked already knowing I had to get up. ‘Its half four.’ He replied getting up and collecting my things for me. ‘At least tell me the cafeteria opens at normal hours!’ I asked I was seriously hungry. ‘Nope, doesn’t open till ten.’ I groaned and grabbed my stuff on the way out before I closed the door and turned around. ‘Hey Lincoln.’ I called as he was walking into his bathroom. ‘Yea?’ He asked stretching and showing a flash of stomach. ‘Thankyou.’ I called softly before leaving.

 

I dragged myself a few doors down to my own room feeling rather sorry for myself. I quickly shed all of my clothes and washed my hair in the shower, and then washed myself with a wash cloth. I didn’t have any plasters to replace mine with. I quickly braided my hair as water fell down my bare back, sighing I found a pair of clean jogging bottoms and a running tee-shirt. I was going to have to ask my mother to get me more – and sports bras I only had five… Kinda needed more if I’m sweating my tits off (wow gross imagination) off every day.

 

I found my own trainers and grabbed a black zip up hoody, when I was done I returned to Lincolns room, I heard quiet but raised voices inside. I opened the door a little intrigued. ‘If she was hurt you shouldn’t have left her alone!’ Cam half shouted they had luminous blue laces and grey souls the rest was purple – they were memory foam I loved them. ‘He didn’t Cam, he sat with till I was asleep.’ I told him, Lincoln raised an eye brow at me. He stood there topless rubbing a towel on his head. I averted my eyes from his flat stomach – which I’m pretty sure had muscle chiselled in to the very core of if he tensed it.

He winked before going to find a black running top. ‘Why didn’t you say?’ Cam asked his brother. Lincoln pointed at me ‘the whole of this started cause she helped a guy…’ he replied as he tugged his top over his head. ‘Anyway anyone have coffee?’ I asked jumping on the spot more than a little excited I loved coffee and here they didn’t serve it, Cam was literally a life line. Cam handed me a flask and I threw myself on Lincoln’s bed. ‘Right I’ve got what I want, enjoy your run I’m going for a nap.’ I informed them cuddling my coffee.

 

‘When did you turn lazy?’ Cam asked laughing, ‘born this was I’m afraid.’ I replied taking a big drink, already feeling the caffeine hitting my system with a blow. I shoved my phone down my tee-shirt and into my trouser pocket, headphones were left dangling down the front of my tee-shirt. Shuffle automatically began playing through my head phones. ‘We going?’ I asked drinking almost all of my coffee. Sighing I jumped up and down and stood up beginning to stretch my tired bones. When I finished I thirstily drank the rest of my drink before handing it back to Cam who shook his head. I jumped up and down again before standing still ‘we going now?’ I asked a little excited now that I was awake. ‘Got a rain coat?’ Cam asked a little worried, he had a dark blue one that was soaked, I nodded and ran to fetch it before meeting them outside of Lincoln’s room. Mine was a dark purple and grey. They matched my own running shoes, I even had a sports bra somewhere that matched.

 

I jogged as quietly as I could down the double set of stairs, as soon as I reached the landing I sprinted in the direction of the hills. I could hear my trainers hitting the ground with a rhythmed slap, slap. I quickly put my head phones in and sprinted even faster, I felt the stretch in my calves. I felt the muscle tense and relax, it felt weirdly enough normal. As the music pushed me to speed up, I did. I saw the forest that led to the uphill tree ville. ‘You have an hour, get up. When six o’clock comes around I want you to turn tail and sprint back. If you haven’t reached the top by the hour you need to do so quickly, if any of you fail we will keep doing this until you reach it.’ Cam called out. An hour? It took me an hour twenty last time.

 

He handed us a bottle of water each, I groaned I hated holding this in my hands and running. ‘Less water less energy. Can you work with less hydration?’ He asked grinning, I rolled my eyes and took off running. ‘Breakfast better be ready by the time I get back.’ I yelled already running.

Chapter twenty two

 

It was dark in here, but I knew even though I couldn’t hear or see him Lincoln was the one bearing down my neck and for some reason that felt okay. Music helped me tear through the forest, my stomach grumbled but I pushed through. I can do this, Lincoln suffered the same. Cam ate the same (when he felt like it) I thought chuckling. If they said and did this so could I. An hour was a short time, but I was already nearly out of the forest. The running up hill was harder, but the ground was dryer. I had almost forgotten what a horrible day it was. I loved it.

 

Instead of feeling boiling or freezing I felt okay. The water bottle annoyed me so I put it down next to a tree before I hit the incline. I could drink some when I ran back down. Endurance. I never brought drinks with me. Never when I ran it was all or nothing. A real cheesy ‘pop’ song came on, it was something I adored it was a little unusual but kinda great. The beat was strong and the song loud. I mentally sang along as I sprinted through the forests carnage.

 

It wasn’t all that dark now, the day was slowly lightening. The rain hardly touched me so I unzipped both jacket and jumper but continued wearing them. They flapped annoyingly but I soon forgot and started counting. Some people recorded their mile per minute thing but because of Cam I counted. Not for anything in particular but by distracting my mind I thought straight. Instead of worrying which took more brain space I was forced to concentrate, sucking to be great at this.

 

Half an hour flew by so quickly but I was a good way up the hill, my head hurt from all the counting and blasting music but I wouldn’t change it. Six hundred seconds doesn’t seem all that long a time once you’ve counted them three times. By the forty minuet marker I could see the sky the trees were thinner the higher I went. By fifty minuets I knew I could make the top in the next ten minutes.

 

At the top was a pick nick blanket with bottled water placed randomly. The soaked red and white blanket had a total of ten bottles led there. I personally wouldn’t want to carry my own bottle. Great that’s going to be the next task isn’t it. I sighed and drained a bottle whole before placing it back down and returning. It was 5:56, I had some sprinting to do to get back down now.

 

I took a deep breath and ran down the path Lincoln had chosen yesterday. I had to agree it was slimy, and way more hazardous but it was also the more direct path. I tried to keep blinking to a minimum, lengthening my stride I saw Lincoln ahead of me jogging without pause. His longer legs were more equipped but I was smaller more agile and a little faster. I ignored my cold wet feet, my sweaty back, banging headache and blurry eyes I knew at the end of this trail it was over.

 

I eventually caught up to Lincoln even surpassed him, but I needed to go faster. I had cut the running up time in half. Last time I had jogged it, but I had sprinted down and still made it in twenty minutes. At fifteen minutes I was getting angsty. But then the ground stopped dropping, it flattered out and I easily found my water bottle. Laughing I pulled out my headphone and sprinted more steadily out of the forest.

 

I found Cam walking back towards us with a big flask of what smelt like soup.

 

In threw myself on the drenched floor gasping for air, it was wet and cold but I’m pretty sure I would have slept there if Lincoln hadn’t hauled me to my feet. ‘Come on you two 1 hour eighteen? I can do it in one hour flat.’ He called looking happy. ‘You serious?’ I panted feeling a little faint. He nodded and passed me the warm soup with a concerned look on his face. ‘You. Suck.’ I called drinking some before handing it to Lincoln. ‘How do you think all the drink bottles ended up there?’ He asked stretching out his back. I rolled my eyes ‘I always thought. There was a secret. Back way for trucks. Or something.’ I panted, he shook his head as Lincoln handed me back the soup. It was good, thick creamy I love tomato soup. I clutched my stomach and nearly threw up. ‘Meds?’ I gasped clutching my stomach. I passed Lincoln back the flask.

 

He looked at me shocked and quickly retrieved a packed from his coat, I shook my head. Too late. I ran to the closest cover of trees ready for my spaziming stomach to throw up the food. Cam followed me muttering to himself. ‘You not going to throw up. Repeat after me.’ He called out softly. I shook my head again. ‘Breath in, One – two, three. And out.’ I nodded distraction. I held my hand out and he passed me my pill.

 

‘Fuck that was close.’ I told him standing straight. ‘Does that happen often?’ He asked. ‘Naa only in the morning and only after exercise. They used to try to get me to eat bananas but I can’t look at them without wanting to yalk now. I’m fine to miss a pill as long as I don’t do so much exercise.’ I replied automatically clutching my stomach. ‘Quit you’re hovering, I’ll be good in ten.’

 

I looked into the mirror image of his brothers eyes, but they were kinder, gentler. They were complete opposites. Cam was strong, incredibly so, he was sweet and nice. So why did I keep running into Lincoln, the fates were playing a cruel game on us all.

 

Holding Cams eyes seemed to become my entrapment, I was stuck in a moment I wasn’t all that sure I wanted to be a part of. His eyes held me like that of a helping hand, the one holding you, stopping you from falling into the abyss bellow. So why couldn’t I stop thinking of Lincoln? He was a jack ass mostly, yea but he can be nice and even if he’s an ass you like him. My cruel mind whispered traitorously to me. No I didn’t I was just drawn to him. Three days down, I only had four more until we would officially stop being forced to work double shifts together. I would only have to deal with him during sparing. I only felt connected to him because of the ‘training’ we endured together.

 

‘Will you teach me so more kickboxing? I kinda won’t to be able to kick your brother’s ass.’ I asked breaking the silence. His smiled turned into a crazed grin. ‘Course princess.’ He replied good naturally. ‘Ugh not you two.’ I complained.'You love it.' I glared at him before turning and walking away from him. Starting from now Lincoln is going to stop affecting me so much. I walked out from the underbrush to see the original pair of stony blue eyes. He smiled softy flashing a dimple. Ugh who was I kidding? This guy was a pro, okay so instead of cold turkey maybe I should just not ever be alone with him? I glanced at his eyes again. I'm doomed. 

Chapter twenty three

 Sparing with Cam is diffrent, his is soft where Link is hard. Calm where Linclon is steal. But why did I miss him? I hand held punching bag hit my head again. 'Quit doing that!' I called out annoyed, third time this hour. 'Quit thinking so much and do then.' He replied annoyed, for a second he sounded like his brother. I grinned and quickly aimed a kick at his head, which he caught with his free arm eaisly. He threw down the bag and pulled my leg closer. 'Argh!' I yelled falling into him. Loosing his balance he to fell. I giggled and began tickling him. 'AHH. Quit. Doing. That!' He called out annoyed, even his teeth were gritted. I laughed and tickled him harder, pinning his arms down with my knees. He laughed and pushed his hips forward. And kept pushing until I rolled left - which he quickly took as an invitation to pin me to the floor instead. 

 

'How would you get out of this?' He asked with all seriousness. I shrugged not knowing. 'Think. Look for a weak link and test it. Theres no wrong answers, theres just the one that works the best.' I nodded and tried sweeping his arms out, he was holding his weight off of me. Failing I brought my knee up into his adobinum. He gasped but held furm. I brought my face forward and bit his neck softly, I then pushed my whole body forward, when he moved back a little I let go and rolled to the left. 

 

Laughing I stood up and jumped up and down. 'I so Ninja.' I called out holding my hand out to help him up. 'Are you an illeterate one?' He asked pulling me back to the ground and trapping me again. 'Break free.' He comanded. Not that I'm complaining but I spent quit a bit of time under his body trying to 'break free.' I'm guessing this was mondays lesson, atleast I would know the basis of breaks I suppose. 

 

'Okay, that's enough. I think we shoud work on form next?' It was more of a question, even he was layed in a thin layer of sweat. I shrugged and tried to fight back the twinge in my sholder. 'I'm having troubble with jump kicks.' I supplied slyly, grinning. 'You haven't done that in class yet. No one has.' I pouted good naturally and he only shook his head. I sighed and got into position. 'Half turn kick.' He called out, not putting his hand out. Okay, i'll just imagion I'm kicking your face. I though and positioned myself with my left foot forward and left arm in a block above it. My back leg flew forward and kicked an invisible target and then returned. 'Drop your arms again and I'll throw a punch.' He told me deadpan. 'I think I'mma see if Links stole your persinolaty.' I mumbled but didnt move. No fratnising with Linclon I said reminding myself. 'Again.' He called and I repeted the movement. My foot snapping, this time my arms didnt drop. This kick was easy. Straight up, kick with the front of your foot, mind your toes. 'Again.' I repeated. 'Again.' He called. 'Again. Swap. Again. Swap.' He called out all of a sudden. I kicked, jumped in the air to swap feet, kicked, jumped to swap feet and kicked again. 'Good.' He called out with a small smile. Hella yhea. I thought but didnt want to say incase he got annoyed. 

 

'Where do you aim this kick.' He asked as I stood still, he motioned again and I instatly kicked. 'Chest.' I called out and jumped and swapped my feet as he made a turn motion. 'Turn kick.' He called out this time. For a second I was confused and then aimed higher and kicked through the invisible object before getting back into my stance. 'Good. Half. Turn. half. Change. Turn. Half.' I quickly complied already bored. 'Keep rushing and forgetting your arms and your gonna end up with a bruise.' He called out grinning evily. He liked this game. 

 

I sighed and sdjusted my stance. 'Where do you aim a turn kick?' He asked. 'Side of face.' I called out automatically, it was higher therefore it had to be. He nodded. 'Axe kick.' He called out. I sighed, hating this one. It was just as high but you didn't hit your target until the way down. The 'plam' or bottom of your foot was what hit the pad or person. I complied, axe kick was good - you got more momentum going down but you had to be careful not to slam your foot on the floor - that hurts. 

 

'The one step.' He called out suddenly. It was a normal half turn kick but you had to kinda do a little hop to make sure you didn't tangle your feet up. I quickly jumped back after I 'hit' my marker. 'Which foot do you kick with' He asked. 'Front, jump forward with back.' I called out automatically. He nodded, looking a little happier. 'Turn kick.' He called out, I loved this one. It was dangrous. You turn with your front foot and use the momentum to kick with your back. It was great. I hopped back into place instead of turning back into it, I didnt want to leave my back to him. 'What hits?' He asks. 'The calf.' I called out panting. 'Again.' 

 

'Okay, doubble half turning kick.' He called out this time. I gave him a confused look and then kicked out with my left and then jumped onto my right leg and kicked out again. 'Try to make the leg coming down and the one going up the quickest transition you can make it. You dont want to be that close on one leg.' He called out. 'Again.' Ohh that word. Three doubble half turning kicks later he was satisfied. 'Where would you aim?' He asked. 'Left and right kidney.' I repiled thinking for a moment. 

 

'Reverse turning kick.' Okay so thats basically turn backwards and kick with the back of your foot. Hmm it was awkward and he made me repeate it ten times. 'Try it higher. Aim for my head.' He asked holding up a pad where his head would be. I grinned and kicked it. The satifying slap had us both grinning. 

 

'Want to see if you can make me move?' He asked grabbing a full kicking pad I grinned. The push kick. Your feet are ish facing 'forward' whilst your head is facing left. So you kind if have to twist your feat on the ground and then use your front foot to kick out with a flat foot and push. Basically the leg is bent and you dont have the room to straighten it without making it. The first coupple times I failed but on my fith try he took a step back. I whooped and fell to a heap on the ground grinning. '360 half turn?' He asked. 'It has a jump' He called out with a sing song voice. 'Nuuu.' I replied. Not wanting to move. 'Fine I think I've broke you.' He sighed and led beside me. 'How are your muscles?' He asked concern flavouring his tone. 'Wobbily, kinda shake if I move.' I replied rolling over to face him. 'Good.' He replied closing his eyes and putting his arm over his face. 'Good?' I asked undignified. 'Well we must pull your muscles to their furtherst point before allowing them to mend themselves.' His reply was muffled, sleepy. I wanted to giggle but managed not to. Ten minuets and I'll do something to him. 

 

Chapter twenty four

 Revenge with no just cause

 

I lay here thinking of what I could do, not twenty feet away were marker pens. But that wasn't quite good enough, tie his shoes together? To juvinile. As I continued my plotting Link walked in. Perfect. I placed my finger over my lips and pointed to his half brother. I mimicked snoring and his face lit up. Like literally his whole face went from moody to estatic in seconds. I wonder what Cam had done to him, I was about to ask but Link put his fingers on his lips and I couldnt help stair at them for a second or two. 

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Publication Date: 08-18-2015

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