Whats life worth living?
Why go on anymore?
Is there a good reason for living?
These are questions I often ask myself. The answers are always no. If it was up to me I would have already been dead. But that's not my choice. I don't get to chose my fate, no one dose. my name is Faith,but yet that is yet another lie in life. I have no faith or hope.
During class, when all the war went on behind the teachers back, I thought about Nova. His blond hair, the way he looked today. I don't no why he hesitated. Or why Kim said what she did. I wasn't pretty. But all that thinking distracted me. I didn't know that someone was talking to me.
“Hey, I know that Nova likes you,” a girl said
I ignored her. I knew she was ling, Nova thought of me as a friend.
When it was lunch time, I sat alone. I didn't eat. Kim always worried about me. I didn't see Nova till the last period of school. He didn't look at me or say a word. Was he mad at me? Did I say something to make him mad? Was it because I ran off? Nova is so complicated! When class was over and the teacher left, I made Nova sit down.
“ Whats you're problem!
my fate, no one dose. I want so badly to die, to end my misery now, but I cant.
I don't live with my real parents. I simply live in a house with a women named Cindy, a man named Carl, a 8 year old boy named Chris, and a guy my age named Todd. They are NOT my family, they never will be. I go to high school like everyone else, only I live with the school jock, or as I call hi the school jerk.
I am a outcast, not only because I'm unsocial, but because of the way I look. I have the darkest shade of black hair you will ever see, the most hunted shade of green eyes, the wickedest mouth. They call me the witch, or the creep. But, I don't care, that means I don't have to socialize. Yay. I don't even want to talk to my teachers.
This is how the mornings go.
I wake up at 6:00am in the morning, lifeless. I sit in bed for a whole hour, thinking. Then I get up, take a shower, and wait till everyone else gets up. As usual Tod's up and early.
“Hey Faith, you're up early,” he said, getting the the milk out.
“Leave me alone, jerk,” I said, pulling me knees up to my chest and putting my head in them.
“All I said was hi,” he couldn't leave it alone.
“That's all it takes,” I said, walking outside.
He walks a distance behind me. But try's to talk. All I hear is blah blah blah. By the time we get to school, Beth takes him away. That just might be the happiest part of my day. When he had the chance he would annoy me. I would only talk to two people. Kim and Nova.
“hey, beautiful whats shaking?” he asked?
“Don't you dare call me that you-”
“Hey,hey, its only me. Don't kill me,” Nova said.
I felt red. I blew off on my friend. I turned to look at him, his blond hair that made him stick out from me, hi unreal baby blue eyes, they calmed me.
“I am so sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you. I thought you where Todd,” I said.
Nova lived next door, he just didn't walk to school. He hated Todd more than I did.
“Wait, dose Todd call you beautiful, dose he harass you? You can tell me,” he asked, concerned.
“No, no but why did you call me-”
“Just because,” he said.
“So, Faith whats been going on lately,” Nova asked, changing the subject.
“ Nothing. Tell me why you called me that lie,” I said
He looked nervous. He didn't look me in the eye. we stood there, in silence. Every minuet that went by I got more angry.
“Just tell me! I'm you're best friend,” I said.
Publication Date: 02-21-2011
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