Content
1st March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone 5 and a half (FAT)
Calories: 4024.6 (TOO MANY)
Things eaten: 1 tub of Ben and Jerry’s Phish food ice cream, 1 giant Cadbury’s Easter egg, 6 Cadbury’s creme eggs and 1 1.5litre bottle of coke.
Ugly, covered in spots, fat and treated like shit.
I knew this would happen. I knew he’d dump me. I knew it all along so why didn’t I stop it, or at least do something about it? Why did I have to go and raid the Easter cupboard? I knew those creme eggs were for Lily. She’s going to be mortified. Mum’s going to kill me. She already hates me. I called her a cow this morning. I didn’t mean it. I never do. It just slipped out. It always slips out.
Now look at me, watching P.S. I love you and stuffing my face with Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. I know I’ll regret it later; calorie by calorie I’m growing in size. I’m already fat. I’ll be obese by the end of the week. That’s why he dumped me, isn’t it? It’s because I’m fat. It’s because I’m fat and ugly and covered in spots.
[FACEBOOK]
[Olivia Dean is now single]
Aimee Scott
Hard luck babe
Lewis Reynolds
So you should be! It’s about time he opened his eyes. Cow
Jessica Whitely
Good for me! :D
[Jack Marshall is now in a relationship with Jessica Whitely]
(Jack)
I did it, I ditched her. Freedom is mine! Thought I'd never do it. It's not that I'm chicken, just that shes been acting wierd lately and didn't want her to cry on me. It's real awkward when a girl cries when you dump her. I don't like it when she cries. I just can't stand her sometimes. She kept getting angry for no reason and taking it out on me. She was getting all jealous and saying that she didn't want me and Jess hanging out together. I guess she was right, but she didn't have to lash out so much. That's why I dumped her. She changed. She won't stop saying she's fat. She's not fat....she's just not the fittest girl in school. Shame really, she was well nice. Not like the other girls, you know? She was more into the stuff I am. More like a mate than a girlfriend. Suppose thats all she is now. Oh well, got a new bird to focus on.
2nd March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone 5 (STILL FAT)
Calories: 0 (MAKES UP FOR YESTERDAY)
Things eaten: Wasn't hungry.
Still ugly, still fat. Still treated like dirt. Although have vowed to only drink water to reduce spots
I got my results for my chemistry test today. I passed. Not that it matters, though. I'm not exactly people's first choice for giving out jobs. I'm only just scraping by in my lessons lately, I only just get marked 'satisfactory' on my homework and I got sacked from my saturday job. Everything in my life is a disaster. First Jack goes out with that smug cow Jess and then I get told I'm being held back from English higher because of 'poor quality work in class'. Honestly, Teachers know nothing at that school. They don't understand my pain. Mum's upset though. Lily hasn't got a clue. She thinks everything’s O.K. in the world and that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy are having tea and biscuits as we speak.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
HANDS OFF!
I saw you eyeing up my man today in Art. You're a proper bitch, you know that? Stay away from him. Face it, he dumped you. He's embarrassed to be seen with you. You're holding him back. Let him go so he can get on with his life with a slimmer, prettier girl, like me.
From:
Jack Marshall
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
(No Subject)
Please stop messaging me. It's creepy.
From:
Olivia Dean
To:
Aimee Scott
Subject:
Thanks for nothing
Thanks for sticking up for me. NOT. Some friend you are. Jess is having a right go at me for nothing.
(Jack)
Stop messaging me, Liv! I don't want to tell you why we broke up and to be honest I don't know what I see in Jess!
Aimee, I don't care if she's in floods. I've got a girlfriend. It's not Olivia. Deal with it, Bitch.
God, It's only been a day and I already have hate mail.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
RE: Thanks for nothing
I did stick up for you but you know Jess...
3rd March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone 4 and a quarter (FAT)
Calories: 69
Things eaten: a cube of cheese
Still ugly. Still fat. Less spots, but still treated like dirt.
I bought Lily some new creme eggs today and instead of an easter egg I got her a cuddly bunny. Don't want her to get fat like me. I put them both in the cupboard. She'll like that for easter. Although those creme eggs make me feel sick looking at them. Bad food means bad body. Bad body means I stay single and depressed forever.
Don't eat the chocolate. Chocolate is bad for you. Most food is bad for you, but cheese is good in small amounts. A cube should do.
I will lose weight.
I will be skinny.
I will get Jack back.
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
likes,
"Guys are way hotter when:
1. They play an instrument (particularly guitar or keyboard)
2. They smile a lot
3. They are modest
4. They laugh at your lamest jokes
5. They have awesome hair
6. They have green or blue eyes
(Jack)
Hey, I play the guitar....wait a second.....
She always said she liked my hair. And I have green eyes. And I think she's funny.....
Is she on about me?
Jess isn't going to like this.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
WHAT DID I SAY?
I saw that little 'like' of yours. describing my man? that's just low, even for you. He won't fall for it though. He's too smart. You're a boobless, fat spotty cow. Enjoy your life, not that you deserve one and once again, HANDS OFF MY MAN!
...........................................
Jessica Whitely:
Olivia Dean is a skank
Lewis Reynolds and 73 others like this
...........................................
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
Call me
Liv, turn on your phone for once in your life! I really want to talk to you! what's up lately with you? its like you don't want to talk to me, or anyone for that matter. Please, just call me.
4th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 Stone 4(FAT)
Calories: 580
Things eaten: KFC. 1 kids sized popcorn chicken. 1 corn on the cob. 1 tropicana fruit punch.
Still fat. Still ugly. Apparently now boobless. Feel sick.
KFC with mum and Lily today. What joy. KFC is for fat people who want to get even fatter. We shouldn't be taking Lily to these places. She'll get fat. I don't want my baby sister to end up like me. I want her to find a boy who loves her, not leaves her.
I want her to find a boy completely the opposite of Jack. Well, not the opposite. He's gorgeous and kind and...
stop it. Jess'll ring your neck in if you keep thinking about him. She knows...
All I'm saying is I don't want Lily to end up with a heartbreaker.
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
has changed her profile picture.
Lewis Reynolds
skank
Jessica Whitely
you look like a prostitute
Katie Reynolds
can't believe Jack even went out with you!
Jessica Whitely
me too
(Jack)
Wow, she's skinny! Her face looks really pale in that picture. Haven't seen her in a few days so I don't know, but that's got to be the light. She never looked like that. She doesn't look like that.
What if she does? OMG what have I done?
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Jack Marshall
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
sincere apologies
I'm sorry for the way I've acted the past few days. You don't deserve it. I dumped you because I hated seeing you upset all the time. Don't be upset. I hate it when you're upset. Are you alright at the moment, Liv? you look a little pale.
Oh well, see you in Art.
Jack :)
..............................................
Olivia Dean:
:D
5th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone 3
Calories: 260
Things eaten: Half a tub of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate fudge brownie Ice Cream
Fat. Ugly. Not upset. Definately not upset. Cannot be upset. Upset Olivia means single Olivia.
Yes! We have contact! I treated myself to a Ben and Jerry's. I know I shouldn't but, well, YAAAAY!
We are one step closer to getting Jack back!
YAAAAAY
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
Happy Days!
You seem cheerful again babe! good to see it! You're looking great. I don't know how you did it but you're deffinately slimmer. Keep it up!
You do look pale, though :/
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
You know what this is about
Once again, you seem to be eyeing up my man. Somehow you're happier and slimmer and it's not right. You don't deserve happiness and you don't deserve to be slim. You're too ugly to pull it off anyway.
(Jack)
Ho Hum Pigs Bum.
BORED.
I miss Olivia.
Not excessively, just as a mate.
She was good to play footie with.
Jess just likes shopping.
Speaking of Jess, I haven't seen her in ages. She keeps hanging around with Lewis Reynolds and his sister.
Creepy.
Maybe I'll call her.
Hmmm....Later.
6th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone 2
Calories: 0
Things eaten: Not Hungry
Jess is a bitch.
Jess came to my house today. How the hell does she know where I live? She came with Ryan and Katie. Mum and Lil weren't there.
You can see the bruises through my top. Great.
what a nice way to spend a suday afternoon.
[FACEBOOK]
Jessica Whitely
looks like someone got what they deserved.
Ryan Reynolds
Hell ye!
(Jack)
Somethings going on and I don't like it. Jess is acting wierd and Liv didn't turn up to art today. Apparently she was throwing up in the toilets.
Poor girl.
7th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone 1 and a quarter
Calories: 3
Things eaten: 250ml Lemonade
Still ugly. still fat. Boobless and more spotty than ever.
Lily says, "mummy I don't want to go to school today,"
She has no Idea.
Try being harrassed by your ex-boyfriend's sycho replacement of you.
You can tell she likes Lewis.
Not Jack.
She's never with Jack.
Good. She's bad for him. She made him skip art once. He loves art. He loved me, too.
Stop it, Liv, you'll smudge your mascara!
Who cares, I miss him!
I have to get Jack back.
But how?
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
school should die a slow and painful death.
Jessica Whitely
you should die a slow and painful death.
Jack Marshall
true!
...................................................
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
Jess
How many times have they said things like this to you?
Jack is such a prick.
If they do this again I'm reporting it.
what are friends for?
(Jack)
No updates on facebook.
Home page.
'school should die a slow and painful death' ha, funny! so true, so true.
'true!'
ho hum pigs bum. more facebook....
8th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 8 stone (FAT)
Calories: 0
Things eaten: wasn't hungry.
Still ugly. Still fat. Still treatedl like dirt.
I have been fighting this battle for Jack for over a week now with no results. He's still into that cow of a girlfriend of his.
Oh look, 2 updates! 'Jack Marshall and Jessica Whitely commented on your status'
Jack thinks I should die?
:'(
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
:'(
Aimee Scott
is worried about liv.
Jack Marshall
confused :/
Lewis Reynolds
don't tell me you've turned.
Jessica Whitely
I'm not that bad am I?
Jack Marshall
No, babe, you're not. something else.
Jessica Whitely
well what then?
Jack Marshall
Homework, babe, nothing to worry about.
(Jack)
Look at me with my babe, Olivia, I mean, Jess. (oops O.o)
I loved my babe.
I mean I love my babe.
I mean I love Jess.
You know what I mean.
what do i mean?
what's up with me?
9th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 11 and a half
Calories: 680
Things eaten: Tuna sandwich (chucked it back up)
Still Fat. Still Ugly. Feel awful.
Been off school today. I was ill. I chucked up all my food.
Bet Jack will never like me now. He's already sided with Jess on everything. I hate him. I hate me. I hate feeling sick and I hate going to school.
I hate my life!!!!!!!!!
I hate everything!!!!!!!!
...
Lily's just come into my room with some tissue. She must've heard me crying.
Now she's crying.
Why do bad things always happen to me?
Don't cry, Lil.
Its alright.
Everything's alright.
Wish I could believe that.
[FACEBOOK]
Aimee Scott
Get well soon, Liv!
Jack Marshall
Get well soon!
..............................................
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
DIE!
I hope that sick bed of yours is a death bed. I know what you're trying to do. You may be able to get the sympathy vote from Jack but you're not fooling me.
You're going to pay for this.
(Jack)
Jess has been all over me today. I kinda like it.
...
I wonder whats up with Liv...
10th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 10
Calories: 0
Things eaten: Not hungry. Anything I'll eat I'll chuck back up.
Fat Fat Fat Fat Fat Fat Fat Fat
Ugly Ugly Ugly Ugly Ugly Ugly Ugly Ugly
Unwanted and alone. That's how I am to spend my life now. Practically mothering my little sister. Cooking her tea of spaghetti. Throwing up every five minutes.
I have been abandoned by every force possible. My teachers have dumped me in the lower sets. My dad left for afghanistan. My mum won't stop going clubbing and my sister is scared to be around me.
Not going back to school for a while. I suppose that's best.
Except daytime TV has really gone downhill since I was 6.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Lewis Reynolds
To:
Jessica Whitely Subject:
BOOZE!
Hey, fancy coming round tonight? got loads of beer off my bro.
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Lewis Reynolds
Subject:
RE: BOOZE!
Yeah, sure x
(Jack)
Apparently Jess is busy tonight. Great. What fun tonight's going to be. Just me with my PS3.
Who am I kidding this is great!
Except noone to play against.
Oh well, I can beat my high score on Black Ops.
What's my high score? hmmm.... I have to beat round 22.
Wait a second, I've never got to round 22 before!
So who did?
OMG.
Liv?
No way.
11th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 9 and a half
Calories: 200
Things eaten: energy drink
Still fat. Still ugly. Not feeling too good but must power through.
Called on jack today.
What? Its been like 10 days.
Well, we played footie in the park like we used to before we went out. It was fun.
I kicked his ass at it.
Brought Lily with me. She played on the swings and every time I scored a goal she ran up to me and hugged me.
She whispered in my ear, "Livvy better now?"
I whispered back, "yeah. Livvy a lot better now."
"Lily happy 'cos Livvy happy."
"Thanks, lil"
"Lily go play on swings now"
I nearly cried.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Jack Marshall
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
smiley face
Thanks for playing footie with me. You always were a good mate. It's nice to see you smiling again.
I hope you're feeling well enough to come back to school. I miss having a critique in art. lol
:)
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Lewis Reynolds
Subject:
SHUT UP!!!!
If you tell anyone about what happened last night I swear to god I will kill you.
If Jack finds out I'm dead and his ex will have him back.
TELL NO-ONE!!!!
(Jack)
Saw Liv today.
It was great, we played footie and her little sister was being all snuggly with her. I love the word snuggly. Plays on your tongue.
Anyway it was all going great until she threw up in the bushes. I would've held her hair back or something but she told me to bugger off.
So I went back to the swings.
Her bag was open.
I know I shouldn't have but I looked inside.
Weight loss leaflets.
She's not even fat!!!!!
12th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 9 and a quarter
Calories: 0
Things eaten: Wasn't hungry
Off to the doctors. Apparently I've not caught a bug but something else is wrong with me.
I have to go back every saturday from now on. Apparently they may have to run tests one me.
I'm not a guinea pig, you know!
Mum was all like, 'she's barely eating!'
and I was just thinking, 'not hungry, biatch! get used to it.'
So now I have to sit at the table with the family to eat.
What joy.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Jack Marshall
To:
Aimee Scott
Subject:
Liv
I need your help Aimee.
It's liv. We played footie the other day. She kept throwing up and I looked in her bag and she has loads of weight loss stuff in it.
I'm worried about her.
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Jack Marshall
Subject:
RE: Liv
are you serious?
she's not even fat!
(Jack)
Olivia isn't even fat.
why would she do this?
why would she want to lose weight?
What to do, what to do?????
13th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 11 and a quarter
Calories: 1348
Things eaten: Ham and cheese toastie, Lemon chicken.
Practically force fed today. Put on 2 lbs! feel fatter than ever.
I hate my family.
We had chinese for tea. Except chinese no longer fills me with the same contempt as it used to. The flavours all seem dilusional and everything tastes like sick. I'm used to being sick now. It has come as part of my life now.
1060 calories for a tub of lemon chicken???? Mum practically shoved it down my throat. I told her I was still full from lunch but oh, no. She had to go and force me to eat.
I hate her so much.
Decided to make myself sick this time. Everyone had gone to bed so I snuck into the bathroom and stuck my fingers down my throat. Its a new low for me but if it's the only way to get skinny and get jack back then it's what I shall do.
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
there's method in the madness. One day you will all realise.
(Jack)
Jess, answer your goddamn phone, will you?
some girlfriend.
it's like she's avoiding me.
what have I done wrong now???
14th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 11
Calories: 465
Things eaten: 3 slices of hawaiin pizza
Back to school today.
Some girl behind me kept calling me a fat cow.
It wasn't jess. She's not in my RE class.
I bet you it was that Bethany girl, she's been looking at me funny lately.
I swear Aimee said, 'go on, do it. It'll make you skinny. be sick. the girls toilets are only down the hall.'
Funny, I couldn't see her mouth moving and she totally pulled a shocked face when I left.
just goes to show what a bad influence this school is on her.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Bethany Wilson
To:
Aimee Scott, Jack Marshall, Jessica Whitely, Lewis Reynolds.
Subject:
WTF???
WTF is up with Olivia Dean, people?
did you see her in RE? she proper kicked off. She shouted SHUT UP right in my face and just stormed out. Anyone have any ideas???
Beth xx
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Bethany Wilson, Jack Marshall, Jessica Whitely, Lewis Reynolds.
Subject:
RE: WTF???
She sent me a note before she left.
'you don't have to tell me twice. I'm going'
I didn't even tell her anything.
No-one was even talking to her!!!!!
She's seriously messed up, though.
(Jack)
Liv is back to school. Still looks pale and still looks thin.
Jess isn't avoiding me though!
she's been snogging me non-stop all day.
probably to make someone jealous but hey, who am I to argue????
15th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 10
Calories: 441
Things eaten: spicy chicken caesar salad with dressing
Mum's watching telly in the next room. I can hear it through the wall. Just adverts.
'Do it like the romans did!'
'when you've finished eating, just be sick and be skinny!'
'guaranteed results'
strange. Never heard an advert like that before.
...
being sick really makes your throat hurt.
i will lose weight
i will get jack back.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Aimee Scott
To:
Jack Marshall, Bethany Wilson
Subject:
(No Subject)
To all the people worried about Liv (or at least i hope you are),
I have some information for you. Olivia Dean went to the doctors a few days ago, which is understandable because she has been being sick lately.
BUT...
there's more...
They want her to go back. It could be because she has something wrong with her stomach and they want to check it out.
OR...
it could be something to do with the information I have. Jack told me that he saw weight loss leaflets in her bag. Also, she thinks she heard us talking to her when we weren't. and that means...
From:
Bethany Wilson
To:
Jack Marshall, Aimee Scott
Subject:
RE: (No Subject)
She's a bulimic nutcase?????
(Jack)
Olivia Dean,
when we were best friends, I swear we were telepathic. Please say you can hear me now. You are not fat. You are not fat. Stop doing this to yourself. You are not fat!!!
I know, I shouldn't have dumped you but it wasn't your fault and you don't need to punish yourself.
Please.
Stop.
16th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 9 and a half
Calories: 490
Things eaten: Sushi, lemonade.
Emergancy call to the doctors today. Apparently there is something they urgently need to check up on.
We were in the doctors waiting lounge and as soon as I sat down, everyone was whispering about me, calling me names. I tried not to listen but it just blurted out of me.
SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU SHUT UP!!!!!!
The doctor quickly rushed out and took us into his room.
"I got a call from a miss Aimee Scott today. She's worried about you, Olivia."
"what's she got to say for herself then?"
"Olivia! Don't talk to Dr. Clarkson like that!" Mum interrupted.
"Miss Scott claims you have been acting strangely lately, just like you were out there. She told me that your friend Jack found some weight loss leaflets in your bag."
"little pikie. what was he doing going through my bag?"
"apparently you were being sick in the bushes."
"I was ill that day"
"yes, but since you came to me, apparently there has been more vomiting. and apparently you sent Miss Scott a note saying 'you don't have to tell me twice, I'm going'. Olivia, she didn't even speak to you."
"Yes she did! I'm not insane!"
Apparently I am insane.
Apparently I have scizophrenia.
Great.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Lewis Reynolds
To:
Jessica Whitely
Subject:
Secret
I can't keep it a secret anymore. I have to tell someone. It's not fair on Jack
From:
Jessica Whitely
To:
Lewis Reynolds
Subject:
RE: Secret
No! Please, he'll kill me.
If you tell him anything I swear to god I will kill you.
(Jack)
What's up with Jess these days?
First Liv, now her. What is it with girls???
I need to call her.
Its creeping me out.
Hmm... text from Lewis...
'I need to talk to you'
hmmm... Later.
17th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 9
Calories: 370
Things eaten: Tuna pasta, sycho medicine.
I'm insane. Quite literally insane.
I'm not going back to school. I'm going to stay at home like ordinary mentally ill people do.
Jack says I'm beating myself up over something, but if I go back to school I'll end up beating someone else up. I know I will. I can just sense it.
Mum wants me to get used to these tablets before I go back. I'll make sure that takes the rest of my life. I don't want to go back.
But I suppose with the medicine, I'm not insane.
There is method in this madness, though. If I be sick, then I'm releasing all the food I've eaten. Which means I'll get skinny and pretty just like Jess. Not that she's pretty.
I would never admit that.
[FACEBOOK]
Jessica Whitely
Told you she was a headcase!!!
Jack Marshall
That's not nice. She's been through a lot.
Jessica Whitely
Sorry Babe. Love you!!!
(Jack)
So thats what's up with her.
She's mentally ill.
Google: causes and preventions of scizophrenia
Ok so it can be caused by....
genes.
social isolation.
a bang on the head in childhood.
unwantedness.
oh no.
Her dad's gone away...
and she felt unwanted by me...
and jess's 'posse' didn't want to be around her.
Social isolation and unwantedness.
Oh no.
This is all my fault.
18th March
Weight: 7 stone 8 and a half
Calories: 1125
Things eaten: Coffee, soft chocolate chip cookie and 2 slices of meat lover's pizza.
The school and my mother have decided to put me on the dance commitee to keep me occupied and out of trouble.
I'm in year 10 for christ's sake! I don't need babysitting!
Oh well, Jack's on the commitee. He bought me a coffee from starbucks today. Caramel Cappuccino with non-fat milk. And, because it's jack, he had to get me a chocolate chip cookie, didn't he?
Oh well.
The dance is in 11 days on the 29th March and we still have to print tickets and stuff. I'm in charge of the design because I'm in the GCSE graphics group. Important job.
The theme is 'valley of the gods' and the hotel is going to look like a greek god's palace. You know, like hercules. Just, watch the film.
Anyway, I thought I'd go as one of the muses in Hercules. That sort of look. It's not a costume party.
Jack says that Jess is going in a skinny, mini, floaty purple dress which is supposed to look greek. Good luck with that one.
I'm going in an elegant white dress with a gold design on the waist. It's absolutely perfect.
Almost perfect. All I need is a man.
And some shoes.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Lewis Reynolds
To:
Jessica Whitely
Subject:
Dance
C'mon Jess!!!!
Please just dump him so we can go together. I really want to be with you, properly. For god's sake jess, you've been sleeping with another guy! You obviously don't like him!
Just dump the virgin. Please.
You know you want to.
(Jack)
That's good, she seems happy now. All she needed was a few tablets and something to distract her. She seems to be enjoying the creativity aspect of the whole thing. She always was like that.
She showed me the dress she's wearing. She told me she had to get down on her knees and beg for it. I laughed. It's a gorgeous dress, though. Sexy, but discretely sexy. Jess has gone for the more, LOOK AT ME, I'M A GREEK WHORE!!!! look. She'll still look fit, though.
I wish Lewis would stop texting me, though. It's getting kind of creepy. He's all like, 'please text me Jack, there's something you should know.'
Yeah, there is something that I should know. YOU'RE GAY that's what! well, that's what is sounds like. He hasn't got a girlfriend and he's been acting really strange around me these past few weeks. Honestly, bro, grow some.
19th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 8 and a quarter.
Calories: 758
Things eaten: Prawn sushi, Tuna and Salmon sushi, wasabi, coffee, a LOT of grapes.
Dance commitee went out for some sushi for tea because we stayed back so late after the meeting. We are refined people, of ellegant taste and so we must eat sushi! and not those wubbish american dishes known as the mac of donalds!
Mum's really pleased about the whole thing of me not feeling ill anymore so she's decided to give me a big wod of cash to spend on this dance! Yaaaay! go me! So, How about shoes covered in diamontes worth £190?????
Nah, they won't go with my theme. I think I'll go for some gold coloured sandals. I've bought lily a little tiara online. I hope mum doesn't mind. I figured lily should look like a princess once in a while. We all should.
Jack has been really nice to me lately. It's nice, it's like we've gone back to how we were before we started going out. I can't help but want more, though...
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Lewis Reynolds
To:
Aimee Scott
Subject:
Help me
I know I haven't been the best of friends to you lately, but I really need your help. I've betrayed my best friend and I need help putting it right. Please help, please.
To:
Aimee Scott
From:
Lewis Reynolds
Subject:
RE: Help me
What did you do??????
I promise I'll help. no matter what it is.
From:
Lewis Reynolds
To:
Aimee Scott
Subject:
RE: RE: Help me
I slept with Jess Whitely
(Jack)
Things seem to be going better for everyone now. Liv is back to her old self, jess has laid back on the whole plan to make olivia's life a living hell. But that's probably because she's realised that Liv doesn't actually want to get me back.
Which is good.
We always were good as friends.
Liv as my friend was the girl I fell in love with.
Let's keep it like this.
and let's keep what I just said a secret.
20th March
Weight: 7 stone 8 and a quarter.
Calories: 110
Things eaten: coffee. I chucked all my other food away.
I don't need those sycho tablets. I'm not insane. I'm normal, I'm normal, I'm normal.
I got to the hall early for the commitee meeting. Bethany Wilson was in there. She saw me and smirked.
"Look what the cat dragged in, crazy little liv"
"you're not on the commitee,"
"what's that in your bag? A box of sycho tablets? Poor liv."
"I'm not crazy!"
"Then why do you need to go and see the doctor then? Why do you need those tablets? Why have you made yourself sick? Because your insane, That's why!"
And that's when I showed her. I don't need the tablets. I turned on the hot tap in Mr Logan's sink and sent those tablets down the drain.
"I don't need them." I smiled. She got the picture. "Now get out!"
[FACEBOOK]
Bethany Wilson
Olivia Dean is a psychopath do da, do da, Olivia Dean is a big fat skank, oh de do da day!
(Jack)
Olivia's been distracted today. She couldn't stop staring at the clock in Dance committee today. It's like she wanted to leave. I thought she liked being on the committee.
She didn't come to dinner with us, either. Do you think it's me?
Have I done something wrong?
No, can't be.
I've been nothing but nice to her.
Ok, so jess has laid off the whole bullying thing.
So has Ryan.
What about Aimee? Has something happened with them?
Maybe Liv was going to meet her afterwards.
Yes, that'll be it. You know what girls are like. Friends come first.
21st March
Weight: 7 stone 8 (FAT)
Calories: 69
Things eaten: some cheese. Which, of course, I chucked back up. Cheese is disgusting.
I went to the dress shop today to get a size. It turns out, a size 10 is too loose and an 8 is too skinny so I'm going to have to lose as much weight as possible in 8 days to be able to fit into it.
That shouldn't be too difficult. All I have to do is exercise a bit. And not eat much.
Method to the madness, method to the madness.
If I lose enough weight like this, then I'll fit into the dress.
I hope.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Emily Brown
To:
GROUP: School
Subject:
Dance
The year 10 dance is in 8 days!
We have confirmed the time of the dance to be 6 o'clock. It is taking place at the Regent Hotel on Mill Street in town.
Remember, get yourself a date by then!!!!!
Tickets are available from Olivia Dean or in the Finance office and cost £6.
Thankyou to Olivia Dean for joining us on such short notice. We need all the help we can get. If anyone else wishes to join, we meet every saturday and sunday in the school hall for 3 hours. We're meeting next weekend before the dance.
Thankyou
Emily Brown
Head of the Dance Commitee
(Jack)
Get yourself a date, eh?
That's easier said than done when you have a girlfriend like Jess. I've been trying to talk to her for days but she keeps avoiding me. Why do girls have to be like this?
They make life so difficult for us men.
Liv would have had something to say about that.
I swear she was a feminist.
22nd March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 8 (NOT SKINNY ENOUGH)
Calories: 482
Things eaten: Lasagne and ice tea.
Lasagne looks like sick. It makes me want to be sick. 3 times.
It's the only way to get skinny for the dance.
I will get skinny. I will get jack back.
and I will do it all in 7 days.
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
Operation GJB is underway
Jack Marshall
what?????
Bethany Wilson
don't bother, Jack, she's loopy. That could be world war 3 plan for all we know
Jack Marshall
that's harsh, Beth
Bethany Wilson
harsh but true???
(Jack)
Honestly, there are some bitches at my school. Bethany Wilson is a prime example. God, she knows that Liv is ill. She knows that she needs support and then she goes and takes the mick on facebook.
Honestly, it's a wonder why we even have girls on this planet.
23rd March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 7 and a half (NOT QUITE SKINNY ENOUGH)
Calories: 260
Things eaten: a tub of 'jamaican me crazy' sorbet
I feel like a bloody humpback whale when I try this dress on. Its so tight! Just a bit skinnier and maybe I could breathe in the damn dress.
I will get skinny. I will fit in the dress comfortably. I will get Jack back and I will do it all in 6 days.
Because I am Olivia Dean.
[FACEBOOK]
Jack Marshall
wants to see if his girlfriend actually wants to go to the dance with him?
.................................................
From:
Lewis Reynolds
To:
Aimee Scott
Subject:
Dance
hey, if Jess doesn't have the balls to own up for it, wonna come to the dance with me???
As mates, of course.
(Jack)
Well that's just brilliant. My girlfriend has declared herself sick for the day so she's not at school.
That means she's trying on her dress for the dance.
or shoe shopping.
That's jess.
and that's another reason why I can't talk to her.
Where has she been lately?
Why is she avoiding me?
If she wanted to dump me she could just say it to my face.
It's not like I'm going to cry.
24th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 7 and a quarter
Calories: 452
Things eaten: Turkey breast with mash potato and peas.
I blared the music out of my room so that Mum and Lily couldn't hear me being sick. I don't want them to know that I haven't got the tablets.
They'll thank me one day for this. They don't understand why I have to do this. I have to get him back and the only way to do that is if I get skinny. After all, he dumped me because I'm fat.
I turned the music off, dried my mouth and went downstairs. Mum and Lil were cleaning up the table after dinner and I heard Lil say, "Mummy what's wrong with Livvy?"
"She's a teenager Lily, you remember what I told you about teenagers"
"when they're in their room. Leave them alone."
"Yes."
"When I'm a teenager, will I need tablets like Livvy?"
"No, Lily. Livvy's special. Livvy needs tablets to make her better"
"Livvy's perrrrfect Mummy"
"I know Lil. I know"
The doorbell rang.
"I'll get it! I'll get it!"
It was the delivery man.
"Lily, Livvy bought you a present"
Lily screamed with excitement as I opened the box. Her cute little face. It would make any heart melt.
I got out the tiara from the box and placed it on Lily's head. "You're a princess now, Lily"
Lily smiled so broadly that Mum and I nearly cried. Mum gave me a hug and whispered in my ear, "thank you. You're such a good girl, Liv"
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
can't get over how cute her little sister is.
Aimee Scott
I know she is, isn't she!
Olivia Dean
Hey, long time no see!
Aimee Scott
we've both been busy
Olivia Dean
:/
(Jack)
Just bought my suit for the dance. I was thinking about not going but I'm part of the commitee, I can't miss the bash I'm orgainising. I have to be there to make sure the building doesn't collapse and stuff.
Plus, Emily will skin me alive if I don't turn up. She wants the entire commitee there to oversee the event as well as enjoy it.
I'm wearing a white suit with a gold tie and a gold hankerchief in the pocket. It won't 'go' with Jess's colour scheme but what does that matter? I like gold. It makes me look expensive.
and sort of James Bond-y
Gorgeous.
25th March
(Olivia)
Weight: 7 stone 7 and a quarter (NOT QUITE SKINNY ENOUGH)
Calories: 0
Things eaten: I wasn't hungry. decided to channel all my energy into ticket sales.
I sold my tickets today. As far as I know, everyone except three people in our year are planning on going. These three people are Aimee Scott, Jess Whitely and Lewis Reynolds. I assumed its because they've got noone to go with but then I thought of Jess and how she's bought her dress and stuff. Surely her and Jack would be going together.
They haven't exactly been close lately.
Maybe I should get Aimee and Lewis to go together. Then everyone would be going, near enough.
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
has just bought her shoes for the dance!
Jessica Whitely
no-one cares!
(Jack)
Why isn't Jess going to the dance? I'm her boyfriend. Did it ever occur to her that her boyfriend needed someone to go with?
Oh well, if she's not going then I'll wing it on my own. Flying solo and all that...
Honestly, what has gotten into her lately?
26th March
Weight: 7 stone 7 (NOT QUITE...)
Calories: 0
Things eaten: too distracted to eat
Dance commitee... what can I say? well...
It was just a normal commitee meeting. Emily was pressuring us to finish preperation on time and everyone else was going on about what they were going to wear.
I put up my dress to Jack to show him the length and he joked, "Do I look pretty, babe?"
But then, something stormed through the doors and teared up this piece in 4 simple words:
"Hands off my man!" Jess screamed. Luckily for me, Aimee was there and she stepped in to help.
"How can you say he's your man? You don't even want him!"
"What made you say that?"
"You slept with Lewis you whore! that's what made me say it!"
The whole room became in a state of shock.
"Jess, is this true?"
"Yes it is." Lewis answered, "I thought you loved me when we did it. You said you'd end it with him as soon as we got back to school"
"but oh no," Aimee added, "someone decided to stay with Jack and go back for more and more of it. Lewis couldn't say no, of course, he's loved you for years. Shame you were too stupid to realise. It's a shame you couldn't appreciate him."
"but...I..."
"save it Jess, it's over." Jack sighed.
and that's the first time I ever saw Jess cry.
[FACEBOOK]
Jack Marshall
is now single.
Olivia Dean
looks like someone got what they deserved. See, Jess, when I say it I don't mean getting beaten up
Jack Marshall
She beat you up? OMG
(Jack)
I'm so clueless. All this time she's been cheating on me and I never even thought...
I trusted her!
And she's been bullying Liv aswell...
She deserves more than to just be single. She deserves all that she gave to Liv and more.
because she's a lying, cheating cow. And everyone but me knew it.
God I'm so stupid!
27th March
Weight: 7 stone 6 and a half (NEARLY THERE!)
Calories: 0
Things eaten: Nothing
It's safe to say that peace has been restored on this planet and everything is as it should be. I am officially not insane as I have spent a whole week off my tablets.
So, I'm still dieting...
but everyone diets...
and I have reason to do so. Because there's method in the madness.
Lewis and Aimee both bought their tickets for the dance. It turns out they had a deal that if Jess wouldn't go with him, Aimee would, which is cool.
So yeah, we all lived happily ever after. Except for Jess who got what she deserved.
[FACEBOOK]
From:
Jack Marshall
To:
Olivia Dean
Subject:
forgiven?
Hey, Liv, it's me.
Look, I'm sorry for dumping you. I promise you that it wasn't for Jess it's just she found herself in the right place at the right time.
There's no easy way to say this but...
since we're both going to the dance alone, maybe we could go together? Just a thought...
As friends, of course...
It turns out my outfit matches yours.
Don't tell anyone I just said that, it was queer.
LOL
:D Jack :D
(Jack)
It makes sense really...
Me and Liv could save money on cars...
and we're both friends...
and single...
and we're both on the commitee...
It just makes sense for me to go with her!
28th March
Weight: 7 stone 6 and a half (I DID IT!!!!)
Calories: 0
Things eaten: wasn't hungry
I did it! I did it! with one day to go!
I got skinny, the dress fits comfortably now!
and...
I GOT JACK BACK!!!!
ok, so he said as friends...
but if thats all I'm going to get then that's good for me.
Hey, maybe if he sees me in my dress. A SIZE 8 dress I might add! Maybe he'll think twice about just being friends...
only time will tell...
[FACEBOOK]
Olivia Dean
Is officially ready for the dance tomorow!
Jack Marshall
see you there, partner!
Aimee Scott
:D
(Jack)
So, tomorow is the big social event in the year. I must look my best. For if Jess is to come, then I must show that I am over her.
To be honest, when was I....
under
her???
everyone knows I like Liv. Maybe I'll tell her tomorow. She needs to know that the reason I dumped her was not because I stopped loving her.
I'll always love her.
29th March
Weight: 7 stone 6 and a quarter
Calories: 0
Things eaten: who needs to eat when you have a party to go to!!!!!!!!
The day of the dance.
It was perfect. The whole thing was lit perfectly, the fog machines were working, the room seemed to shine when we walked in. All the commitee's hard work had paid off.
Jack and I walked in, linking arms, laughing at how rediculous it seemed that we were going in together after all that had happened.
We danced and it was perfect. Everything, in fact, was perfect until I fainted.
[FACEBOOK]
Aimee Scott
did anyone see what happened????
Jack Marshall
she just...collapsed!!!
(Jack)
OMG.
Four hours.
That's how long I got to say goodbye. Liv didn't just collapse. It turns out that weight loss programme made her lose 13 pounds in a month.
It turns out her scizophrenia made her think that she was alright. But it turns out when she got home she would vomit and force herself to lose weight.
She fainted through hunger and because her bulimia had affected her immune system, she couldn't fully bring herself back around. She was awake for 10 minutes and that was it.
and she died...
she died because she thought I didn't love her.
and do you know how that makes me feel?
OMG. She looked so weak. You could see most of her bones. She looked like she hadn't eaten in weeks. She looked totally different from the girl we all saw at school.
I told her, in the last 10 minutes that she had. She opened her eyes just a crack and I said, "I never stopped loving you, Liv. Please know that,"
and she quietly breathed back, "I'm sorry"
and that's when I panicked. I couldn't help but ask her why. I couldn't help but scream at her to tell me what happened.
All she said was, "I love you. Goodbye"
Olivia Dean tried so hard to get Jack back.
If only she knew, she had him right from the start.
Imprint
Publication Date: 03-20-2011
All Rights Reserved
Dedication:
To all the parents who think nothing is wrong...