FIRST CHRISTMAS

It was just twelve months ago
Since my special wish was made
A wish you thought so simple
For which a fortune I'd have paid
And now it's our first Christmas
In our first little house
But I hope the first of many
With my beautiful new spouse
This year my wish is simpler still
On this Christmas day with you
May our hearts be always filled with love
And the stockings be filled with you


BRIEF ENCOUNTER

Snow spattered, unseen, against the steamy glass
As the train rattled out of the station
It was a fairly crowded train, but not full
With weary shoppers, shopping bags bursting
And commuting workers the weeks work done
Journeying homeward at the dark days end
A cheerful crowd though
Pleased with themselves bright faced and hearty
Full of seasonal cheer anticipating the holiday
Seemingly oblivious to the drafty carriage
I sat alone and felt lifted by the quiet jolliness
Contemplating the collective countenance
Of the self satisfied passengers
Then she appeared and I was lifted higher
There she was larger than life vivacious and self assured
Covered with snowflakes and laughing to herself
My snow angel, with snow covering her like sugar on a doughnut
Wrapped up against the cold in a woolen hat and coat
And the long knitted scarf draped about her neck
She shook her head and her light brown hair danced about her shoulders
And the snowflakes melted away from her soft curls
There was a rosy redness on her cheeks
Almost matching the hue of her coat
Either from the cold winter evening or a liberal taste of Christmas spirit
A little of both probably
She made her way down the train between the seats
Leaving wet snowflakes in her wake
Full length coat swishing side to side
She moved almost gracelessly, which suited her well
As she tottered a little in her high boots
Perhaps due to the lurching motion of the train
Or the Christmas punch and eggnog
She was still laughing softly to herself which also suited so well
And then she saw me, and her eyes lit up like beacons
She stopped and stood momentarily open mouthed
Then her smile illuminated the carriage
My heart soared at the sight of her
I returned her smile and she flushed a little deeper red
It had been almost a year since I last saw her
My lovely lost love, Linda
I had locked all my feelings away but now they were back
Like a door had opened in my heart and they all rushed out
And I missed her so much I didn’t know just how much till that moment
We were never lovers, only ever friends
But very special friends very close friends though no more
We laughed a lot together, shared confidences
Best friends but no more than that,
Though I wanted more, so much more
But I didn’t want to lose what we had so I said nothing
I loved her so much, but she was not free for me to love
And Linda was not free to love me even if she wanted
So I contented myself with our special friendship
My unrequited love remained so
If that was all then better that than nothing
I was happy to love her unconditionally
Then circumstances changed, my father died
I had to move away and I didn’t see her again, until now
Now she was in front of me, my angel, larger than life
Smiling, blushing, laughing and so lovely
I stood up and smiled at her again
She threw herself at me and she hugged me so tight
I smelled her hair as I held her and was intoxicated by her scent
All the old feelings flooded back over whelming me
Yet could it be my love was not unrequited
We sat down on the lumpy seats in the rattly carriage
And were completely alone
We sat looking at each other not wanting to lose sight of one another
In case the spell were broken
She removed a glove and put her hand on mine
As if testing it was not a dream then she slipped her hand into mine
Her delicate fingers so small in my grasp
For the remainder of the journey we reveled in each other’s company
We caught up with the lost months filled in the gaps
Still oblivious to our companions
It was as if we had never been apart
Then the train shook to a halt as all too soon we had arrived
Our fellow travelers rushed off to their Christmases
Reluctantly we left our seats and disembarked arm in arm
Then hand in hand we walked slowly along the platform
Still talking and laughing and then out onto the street
Where the shops were now closing and the town was relatively quiet
From one pub Noddy Holder screamed “it’s Christmas” to the world
Only the pubs and restaurants seemed to hold any attraction to most
But we joined a small group gathered round the Salvation Army band
And joined in with the carol singing in the town square
Before strolling towards the taxi stand
As the snow again fell onto Linda’s soft curls
We took our place in the queue of travelers eager to be home
I wanted to be nowhere else but with her
Smiling she turned to face me and kissed me gently on the lips
Such a warm sensitive and tender kiss
When our lips parted she smiled at me coyly
And flushed a deep shade of pink
Then I kissed a snowflake off her nose
And cupped her flushed cheek in my palm
Then I slid my fingers beneath her hair
Caressing the soft downy hair on her nape
And pulled her sweet lips to mine and returned her kiss
Her arms enveloped me holding me so close, so tightly
Not wanting to let go, not wanting to lose what we had found
Not wanting to lose me again
We stood locked in our embrace as the snow fell softly on the scene
She pulled away for a moment then buried her face in my neck
And spoke “I’ve missed you so much, I’ve missed your love for me”
I had waited so long for this moment waited so long to here those words
To hear my love returned then we kissed again
Cabs arrived and departed through the slush
The queue around us just kept moving as if unaware of our love
After a while we moved from the queue sat on a bench and talked
My love was not unrequited she felt the same for me
She had always done so yet still she was not free
She was torn between the two of us
Torn between the comfortable familiarity for a good man
A loyal and dependable man, safety
And the passion she felt for a soul mate
It wasn’t fair on him he hadn’t done anything wrong
So our love had to be a forbidden one
Best friends no more, I wanted more, so much more
And could not content myself with a special friendship
Now I knew my love was not unrequited
There was no going back, now Pandora’s Box had been opened
But at least now I knew she loved me
With the same depth as I loved her
We walked back to the taxi rank and kissed again in the snow
All too soon she got into a taxi
And through the winter wonderland departed taking my love with her
With her palm pressed against the glass she craned her neck to keep sight of me
Through the snow spattered window until the very last moment
Till the cab had gone out of sight
She was gone from my arms, gone from my view, gone from my life
But a Christmas happening had changed my life forever
A brief encounter, fleeting, here and then gone
Her scent still in my nostrils, the taste of joy on my lips
My soul mate gone forever, yet forever in my memory, forever in my heart
I would never see her again and moved away in the New Year
Making a life elsewhere but I never forgot her
And when on a winter’s night I hear the “Sally army” play
Or when the snow falls during Christmas time
Or I feel a snowflake on my skin
I feel her small hand in mine and then she is once again in my arms
And I smell her soft brown hair and the taste of her is on my lips
I hear her say “I love you” and she is mine forever

I WATCHED A SNOW FLAKE MELT

Chestnuts roasting in the fire
The smell of cinnamon in the air
I watched a snow flake melt
On her beautiful auburn hair
As we held hands in the soft light
Of the Christmas candle glow
And I kissed my first love
Beneath a sprig of mistletoe


SNOWMAN BLUES

Out of the snowy lawn
The snowman grew
Wearing a hat and scarf
The way that you do

With pebbles for eyes
Pressed into the snow
A smiley twig mouth
And a large carrot nose

He’s a magnificent site
The snowman that grew
But he’s just snow and ice
And no substitute for you

I wish you were here
To chase the blues away
I wish you’d come back
To me for Christmas day


OH MY CHRISTMAS ANGEL

Oh my Christmas Angel
Won’t you here my plea
Oh Christmas Angel
Spend Christmas with me

Oh my Christmas Angel
Surely heaven sent
Oh Christmas Angel
Be my Christmas present

Oh my Christmas Angel
Wont you here my plea
Let me un-wrap you
Beneath the Christmas tree

Oh my Christmas Angel
Oh please hear me do?
Oh Christmas angel
Let me make a devil out of you


CHRISTMAS WITHOUT HARRY

It was early when the children woke up
With their squeals of joy and delight
They hadn’t woken me though
I’d been awake half the night

Christmas held no joy for me this year
I was not looking forward to the day
And I always loved Christmas
This year I didn’t want to play

It was the first Christmas since I lost Harry
And each moment was a fresh agony
Everything we used to do together
Now had to be done by me

When you are the perfect partnership
It’s so hard when you lose one of the team
He was the cream cheese on my bagel,
I was the coffee to his cream


Its six months since he was taken from me
But the wound has barely healed
It takes just the slightest remembrance
And a fresh scar is then revealed

The children have all adjusted well
I’m so proud of the way they’ve coped
They’ve gotten on with their lives
And not sat around and moped

I’ve lain awake most of the night
Reliving Christmases gone by
I laughed at all the happy memories
And then the laughter turned to cries

It was going to be a difficult day to bear
And I would be glad when it was done
But I didn’t want to be a Grinch
And pour water on the children’s fun


Having Christmas without Harry
Was like having an undecorated tree
He was my best friend and soul mate
He was just everything to me

So for the kid’s sake I had to grin and bear it
Put on a brave face, smiled through the pain
I thought it would never end but end it did
And it won’t be that hard again

COMPLETE CHRISTMAS

I wrapped the presents from me to you,
Only a few more things now left to do
I must hang up the bunch of mistletoe
Pour the wine and turn the lights down low
And when we cuddle up together on the seat
My Christmas really will be complete


I’M THINKING OF YOU

I’m thinking of you
As I sit here feeling blue
I miss you every day
While you are away
But duty called you
And of course I knew
You would have to go
Away to fight the foe
So I’m thinking of you
As I sit here feeling blue
Alone on Christmas day
While you are far away


CHRISTMAS IS THE HARDEST TIME

Christmas is the hardest time
When in the bosom of kith and kin
Amidst the exited chatter
And rustle of discarded paper
Punctuated by the joyous laughter of children
And over exited grown ups
I made all the right noises
As I wore my painful smile
I opened my presents when prompted
“Oh isn’t that lovely” I cooed
“That’s just what I wanted” I lied
But what I actually wanted
Was to be somewhere else
Where there was no need of false delight
Or insincere thankful exclamations
Anywhere else but there
They are well meaning souls
Who thought to help me,
By including my in their joyous celebrations
But they don’t understand my grief
Or the empty ache of a shattered heart
Each innocent Christmas ritual cut me like a knife
The familiar songs, once loved, now hurt
And each merry Christmas was a fresh cut
Losing you, my partner in life
Was like having a conjoined twin cut away
And among that happy crowd
My loneliness was most keenly felt
When all the excitement died away
I sat in silent contemplation
When sweet memories of happier days
Flooded into my mind to torture me
I hide it from the crowd
Keeping the pain and sorrow within
But so intertwined were our lives
I am left incomplete
I am in torment every day for the want of you
But Christmas is the hardest time


CHRISTMAS FOLLY

Merriment abounds
And music fills the air
And in the cosy room
I’d hoped to see you there

Friends and loved ones
Surround me, old and new
I wished that one of them
Might have been you

Outside its cold
On this Christmas Eve
When the party's over
I won’t want to leave

But I will head home
Trudging through the snow
And in my loneliness
I’ll wonder how I let you go


OH MY PRETTY LITTLE ELFIN FACED GIRL (PART ONE)

Oh my pretty little elfin faced girl
In green woolly tights and pixie shoes
I’ve admired you from a distance
Where your smile melts away my blues

I watched you bloom in the spring
And bask in the warm summer glow
Then dressed in russet colours of autumn
And all the year I’ve felt my love grow

Now winter is here and Christmas is near
Oh how I long to kiss your sweet lips so
Oh my pretty little elfin faced girl
I pray I meet you beneath the mistletoe


OH MY PRETTY LITTLE ELFIN FACED GIRL (PART TWO)

Oh my pretty little elfin faced girl
In green woolly tights and pixie shoes
Please notice me beneath the mistletoe
And kiss away my Christmas blues

Oh my pretty little elfin faced girl
I wish you would grant my Christmas wish
But it appears that I wish in vain
For you don’t even know that I exist

So I stand alone with my Christmas punch
Looking out at the fresh fallen snow
When I see your elfin face smile at me
And you’re holding a sprig of mistletoe


THE LITTLE CHRISTINGLE GIRL

Oh sweet little Christingle girl
Your daddy is so very far away
“Bring my daddy safely home”
These are the words you pray

Oh sweet little Christingle girl
Daddy is away at the war
“Bring my daddy safely home
Bring him safely to our door”

Oh sweet little Christingle girl
How she misses daddy far away
How sad she is, he won’t be home
To be with them on Christmas day

At Sunday school she made a christingle
She took an orange to represent the world.
And to symbolize the blood Christ shed
She took the red ribbon from her curls


Then she decorated four tooth picks
With fruits and sweets and marshmallows
These she placed in the four corners
To represented all the earthly souls

Then finally in the centre of the orange
She stood a single candle of purest white
And when lit, the candle represented
The world filled with Christ’s loving light

The sweet little Christingle girl
Took it home with her that day
And stood it in the window
So daddy would find his way

And the sweet little Christingle girl
With her daddy so very far away
Knew that when he did come home
That would be their Christmas day


ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS # 4

All I want for Christmas
Is the special girl I love
All I want for Christmas
Is my angel from above

She need not be wrapped
And tied up with a bow
I’ll take her as she is
Smiling face aglow

Any other Christmas gift
Is valueless to me
I just want my angel
Beneath the Christmas tree

So on Christmas day
As we stand beside the tree
I will take her in my arms
And kiss her tenderly


THE VERY FIRST CHRISTMAS

Putting up the decorations
And trimming the Christmas tree
Writing all the cards
This year from you and me

Your presents are wrapped
Only bows and tags to do
Until this moment I didn’t know
Just how much I loved you

So I will have a happy Christmas
With the love of my life
The very first Christmas
Since we became man and wife


I WROTE A LETTER TO SANTA

I wrote a letter to Santa
Making my request
I told him what I wanted
Stating what was best

I didn’t ask for jewels
I didn’t ask for jewellery
I didn’t ask for gold
I didn’t ask for luxuries

I asked him for a gift
I consider the greatest prise
I asked him for the look of love
To be present in your eyes

I asked him for your heart
So to make me live
I asked him for your love
But theyre not his give


I wrote a letter to Santa
Making my request
I told him that I love you
I’m sure he’ll do what’s best


CHRISTMAS WISH

I’m not looking forward to Christmas
Not since we lost Mum this year
I’m not looking forward to a Christmas
Devoid of any Christmas cheer

Dads doing his best to lift our spirits
All though inside he’s really hurting too
He wants to make it a special time
And do the things like Mum used to do

So we decked the house with garlands
And trimmed the Christmas tree
We hung the Christmas cards on strings
So that everyone could see

Then with all the decorations up
My Dad went round us one by one
To ask us what gift we wanted
And he promised his best would be done


My sister Jules wants new clothes
Kenny wants music of any kind
The twins they want an X-Box
And the baby really doesn’t mind

Then Dad asked me “what do you want son?
What gift would stop you feeling glum”?
I said “I don’t want a present Dad
All I wish for Christmas is my Mum”


GIVE ME A KISS FOR CHRISTMAS

Give me a kiss for Christmas
For my love for you is strong
Give me a kiss for Christmas
I’ve been waiting oh so long

Give me a kiss for Christmas
On this special holy night
Give me a kiss for Christmas
Let me fill you with delight

Give me a kiss for Christmas
That is my only Christmas wish
I promise it will be much more
Than just another Christmas kiss


CHRISTMAS CAROLE

My feelings and emotions,
Long since repressed,
Stirred from their slumber
Feelings I thought had long passed
Were awakened like a sleeping giant
Reappearing like long lost friends
Out of the blue and so unexpected
And Carole was the reason
We met by chance
A week or so before Christmas
In a crowded book shop
Amidst the throng of Christmas shoppers
We simultaneously emerged at the checkout
Both clutching a copy of the same book
The dickens classic
“A Christmas Carol”
Spotting each others proposed purchases
We both smiled
And as far as we could see
We were the only people smiling
Surrounded as we were
By a multitude of the disgruntled
I found myself suggesting coffee
And was pleasantly surprised to here her accept
Following that first chance meeting
We quickly became inseparable
We would sit and talk for hours
About everything and nothing
As we’d sit by the cosy fireside
We would share long walks in the country
And afternoons watching old movies
It soon became obvious
We had both found that elusive something
That had been just out of reach
Just over the next hill
We had found our soul mates
Now we share everything
She was the Christmas gift
I had been waiting for all my life
My very own Christmas cracker
My very own Christmas Carole
CHRISTMAS EVE

We sit beside the hearth,
Just Evelyn and I
Logs crackling in the grate
Flames are burning bright

Just the two of us
Alone in the fire side glow
Sitting in cosy comfort
Warm from head to toe

It was a year ago we met
On a very different night
When I first saw her face
In the soft glow of candle light

It was last Christmas Eve
When I first saw her
It was at midnight mass
And she was singing in the choir


She will be singing Carols
Again this Christmas Eve
We will have to stir ourselves
It’s almost time to leave

But before we leave the cosy scene
I have something to ask
But I’m a little bit scared
As I set about my task

This year has been so special
With her sharing my life
That I want Evelyn to marry me
I want her to be my wife

So as we sit beside the hearth,
Just Evelyn and I
Logs crackling in the grate
Flames burning bright


I pray that when I ask her
I get the response I dare not believe
And she will answered yes
And be MY Christmas Eve


FIONA

I first met Fiona at a Christmas party
A beautiful woman in a young girl’s body
Fiona was far more mature than her years
And she chose me that night
Despite a host of more suitable suitors
And we danced into the night
Her firm body pressed against mine
Her intoxicating scent enveloping me
Arms clinging tightly to me
Her breath against my neck
In full view of envious eyes
And later in passionate embrace
Just the two of us in the darkness
As I kissed her goodnight


CHRISTMAS CANOODLE

She is the object of my desire
Hers is the name I sit and doodle
Oh how I long to kiss those lips
As Sweet as apple strudel
I would give every thing I own
The whole kit and caboodle
To spend one minute in her arms
And share a Christmas canoodle

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Publication Date: 10-18-2010

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