okay, that was pretty good. i like the plotline, or what ive gotten so far, but i do havea few recommndations to make to make reading easier.
one: paper background. defears is right. colored paper is harder to read so i recommend changing the background to parchment or white plain paper.
two: grammar, spelling and punctuation. the areas listed before need some serious work. I had a hard time keeping up. I also suggest you hit... Show more
okay, that was pretty good. i like the plotline, or what ive gotten so far, but i do havea few recommndations to make to make reading easier.
one: paper background. defears is right. colored paper is harder to read so i recommend changing the background to parchment or white plain paper.
two: grammar, spelling and punctuation. the areas listed before need some serious work. I had a hard time keeping up. I also suggest you hit ENTER and bold the titles of the chapter or when you did the flashback and return to the present. it just helps the readers know whats going on. you should also put the titles in the center of the top line of the page for chapters or after a few ENTER hits for the flashbacks. again, makes it easier for the readers.
but other than that, it went very well and i love it! i had fun reading this, short as it is, because you described everything so well. i felt like i was actually Nessie. oh, and another thing: capitalization. all names get Caps. you did pretty good with that, but you should go back to it cause you missed at least two Nessie's.
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