I like the attention-grabbing fight scene in the beginning. It's a good story but does need some editing. A good way to do this is to print your work and then go over it line by line. You find a lot of errors this way. I notice you call Brian "Brain" in the first few pages too. Keep up the good work, Scarlet is a no bullshit kind of gal and it shows.
You should add vampire romance into the novel. It makes it strange and territorial.