The Old Man On The Train

By:
The Old Man On The Train
Part One: A girl is riding the train to work and her reading is interrupted when
an old man sits down across from her.

This is a new style I'm trying out. I'm not sure how I feel about it. I might still give the girl and the old man names also...

Keywords: 
life, family
Posts and Comments
Important Post
tj.gonzales

Let me know when you have added more....Sounds wonderful so far.....

1 Comment
This comment was deleted.
Important Post
Deleted User

Can't wait for part II

1 Comment
RebeckDawn

I hope I get around to it someday soon!

Important Post
tj.gonzales

Okay now I want to ride a train with my Howard the pencil, eating a bowl of very vanilla ice cream....Your old man is how I try to be. Have you been stalking me. Or maybe you did watch your dad, after all.

1 Comment
RebeckDawn

He is based loosely on my dad, however, my dad isn't that old yet :)

Important Post
gooduklady

This is the first story I have read of yours and I am very impressed. You caught my attention from the start and held it all the way through. I enjoy character studies and this was excellent. Your writing is quite superior to most. I shall look forward to reading more of this.

1 Comment
RebeckDawn

Thanks Val - I appreciate the kind words - There is a little of myself in this story, which is something I like to steer clear of at all costs in my other writing. I'm hoping to make the second part from the perspective of the old man - I also love character studies :)

Important Post
Deleted User

I say go with the new style. Well, at least finish this story. It's an enjoyable, sad read and your words painted her emotions so realistically. I liked it.

3 Comments
RebeckDawn

Thanks Tanya - I think maybe I have several styles contained within my brain, so I think I'll stick with it for this particular story - although I mainly prefer writing something with humorous undertones :)

Backwood writer

I read this and like Valerie says you got the gift , I did not know you write stories , if I was you I would think on this and see what I could up with for the rest of the story... as I read it was as if I was seeing threw the young girl mind, very very GOOD Rebecca, Your friend Stanley McQueen

RebeckDawn

Thank you very much Stanley!

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